Two months into the run of the Broadway musical Hamilton in San Francisco, with the show at the peak of its success across America, I suffered a heart attack. I was the show’s music director—responsible for conducting and maintaining the production in a musical capacity—and I experienced the attack on my walk home after a performance. I was 43 years old.
At first, the stress of the job was the chosen culprit, but tests would later prove that years of dubious lifestyle choices associated with my maladaptive perfectionism were the real villain. Endless nights of debauchery, designed to quiet my bullying inner critic and low self-esteem, caused my right coronary artery to become 90% blocked. Two stents were placed to get me on the road to recovery, and sessions with a psychologist were prescribed.
Understanding that I urgently needed to find some balance with my perfectionistic demands for myself and others at Hamilton, my psychologist introduced me to self-compassion, a proven technique that moderates the link between perfectionism and depression and helps perfectionists manage their traits in healthier ways.
It proved to be a game changer. Here’s what I learned:
It’s not the demand for perfection that creates results.
Prior to my heart attack, my baseline expectation was complete perfection from myself and my colleagues. I didn’t care that each show was three hours long with 20,520 words sung at a dizzying pace of 144 words per minute. This was Hamilton, a show so important it was well on its way to becoming a permanent fixture in American popular culture. It had to be right. It had to be exact. It had to be perfect!
Of course, I’d always secretly understood that the chances of 35 cast members and 10 musicians getting absolutely everything right every night were slim. But that didn’t stop me from setting almost unreachable standards meant to inspire the very best from every performer, no matter the stress this approach may have caused.
This had always been my preferred method for creating the high standards I was respected for worldwide. I assumed it was the demand for perfection that raised everyone’s game. But my introduction to self-compassion inspired me to consider healthier choices—and challenge my beliefs and methods.
I soon realized that my moral leadership style was actually playing the leading role in achieving near-perfect results, not the demand for perfection itself. It was the collective call to be the best we could be at all times that inspired our greatness. This, coupled with the pride of being involved in such an important and beautiful musical, would help us create the product expected of us.
The experience is as important as the result.
For as long as I can remember, my focus has always been on the result of a task, not on the experience of getting to it. While this approach had its advantages, the journey to the result was often an unhappy and stressful one as I paid little attention to self-care.
Self-compassion prompted me to look at things differently, to consider whether focusing on the experience of achieving the result could not only produce the same outcome but also make it better by bringing some joy into the process. The results were startling.
Instead of relying on the successful completion of each song to feed my perfectionistic hunger, I began to lean on the global experience of each piece to denote success. I would analyze how a particular musical phrase felt, what the picture of the stage in front of me looked like in relation to the lyric, and what the orchestra sounded like as a unit. If I felt completely satisfied with the overall experience, I’d have achieved “perfection.”
As it turned out, the “perfect performance” happened more often using this new method! I became more relaxed during performances, which, in turn, helped me perform better and lead more effectively. I became more forgiving of mistakes because I could appreciate the journey to them, and I had a better understanding of why mistakes happened, which proved to be fantastic knowledge in my quest to prevent them.
I’ve since adopted this global approach in nearly every aspect of my work, encouraging those who work for me to do the same. The results are regularly better, and the experience is infinitely more enjoyable. It’s a win-win!
Understanding others’ expectations creates balance.
Middle management roles can be tricky for perfectionists, particularly in performance-based industries where superiors demand perfection (or as close to it as possible) on a daily basis. Finding a healthy balance in our work can be almost impossible unless we begin to break down and understand the expectations of ourselves, those we lead, and those we work for.
Some months after my heart attack, I drew up a list of these expectations. Predictably, the results showed that I felt perfection was the standard demanded by everyone. Yet, as before, my work on self-compassion encouraged me to question my conclusions.
I soon discovered that the only person really expecting perfection was me.
When considering my superiors, I realized that perfection may have been the set standard in each performance, but my boss was realistic enough to know that achieving it is quite different from demanding it. Providing I was completely dedicated to making the show the best it could possibly be each night, implementing his instructions as diligently as possible, he would be happy.
Similarly, I realized that the people I was leading didn’t demand the same level of perfection from me as I expected from myself. They all seemed to be better connected with the common humanity element of self-compassion: making mistakes is an accepted part of life.
These discoveries led me to understand that a better balance at work would only be achieved if I offered myself the same kindness and forgiveness I gave freely to others. This takes time, and I still struggle with it today, but I’m getting there!
These are all great examples of how self-compassion helped me get on a healthier road with my perfectionism and still achieve great results as a leader. Self-compassion’s power is immense. If you embrace it in the workplace and inspire your employees to do the same, you and your business will thrive!
* * *
JULIAN REEVE is a former music director of the Broadway musical Hamilton turned perfectionism contributor, speaker, and author of Captain Perfection & the Secret of Self-Compassion: A Self-Help Book for the Young Perfectionist. Visit www.julianreeve.com for more information on self-compassion and other perfectionism solutions.
Erin shows overscheduled, overwhelmed women how to do less so that they can achieve more. Traditional productivity books—written by men—barely touch the tangle of cultural pressures that women feel when facing down a to-do list. How to Get Sh*t Done will teach you how to zero in on the three areas of your life where you want to excel, and then it will show you how to off-load, outsource, or just stop giving a damn about the rest.
car stickers Australia, car stickers,horse float decals, 4wd decals
“Learn More Interesting Blogs
Visit: https://secureteatime.com/blog“
Web design
Graphic Designer
Website Design
Web designer
Website development
SEO
Google ranking
Press release
Social media Marketing
Digital marketing
I love your blog and writing style, So helpful thanks!
There are many websites for you to find the ones you need to visit, but you should visit this website. I think you won’t be disappointed.
First, you need to understand that gambling sites for CSGO do not revolve around cash, but around skins. Therefore, you are asked by all CSGO crash game sites to make a deposit using skins, which are then converted into coins. Coins are a specific currency that you put bets on the crash game CSGO. This is the type of gambling in which the main factors are luck and flow. CSGO can crash
There are numerous sites for you to discover the ones you need to visit, however you should visit this site. Your site is very Good
To begin with, you need to comprehend that betting destinations for CSGO don’t rotate around money, yet around skins. Hence, you are asked by all CSGO crash game locales to set aside an installment utilizing skins, which are then changed over into coins. Coins are a particular cash that you put wagers on the accident game CSGO. This is the sort of betting where the principle factors are karma and stream. CSGO can crash
All in all, most find cambodian wife Cambodia women mail order brides for their families. This good fact lets singles know about priority things in marriage life. Cambodian brides love their family and appreciate any family values. If you decided to make a great and strong family with the best Cambodian girls for marriage, then contact the most reliable matrimonial services. The professionals in the marriage field will find you the most outstanding family women.
Quantum est une agence de création de sites internet de premier plan en France qui transforme les entreprises grâce à des sites Web innovants, une stratégie de marque et un contenu convaincant, dans le but d’augmenter les performances et l’exposition de nos clients. Notre équipe de conception interne est spécialisée dans l’ensemble des services de création de sites internet, SEO et SEM aux campagnes de médias sociaux, conceptions adaptatives et réactives, re-branding et création d’identités visuelles. Notre objectif est de raconter votre histoire à travers le prisme de l’inspiration en traduisant numériquement la vision de votre marque tout en créant un lien émotionnel avec le consommateur.
pretty helpful stuff, overall I believe this is well worth a bookmark, thanks https://www-totosi-tehotpro.jouwweb.nl/
Prajituri si torturi Cofetarie Zalau
mulch decorativ
clinica osteopatie cluj
statii grafice
bitcoin exchange
taxi gatwick
Thank you for sharing you can download Among Us completely free here https://amonguscombo.com/
SERVICE AT THE AIRPORT. To or from Canada or airports, travel in comfort and style.
pearson airport limo toronto
Billy Bishop Airport Taxi
1 (800) 449 7461
Looking for a reliable Airport limo & Taxi service from/to billy Bishop Airport toronto, you are at the right site. We offer flat rate black car service
Pearson Airport Limo Toronto offers Flat Rate Airport Limousine to & from Toronto Airport any where in southern ontario and New York State. Our professional guarantee – to Provide you with the most reputable VIP travel experience in Southern Ontario. Experienced in Airport Limo & Toronto Limousine Service.
Yeah great blog people should always take care of physical and mind balance and should take a break from time to time from their monotus lifestyle.
Sex Bayern hat mich schließlich überzeugt und ist meine Lieblings-Dating-App geworden. Ursprünglich konzentrierte sich die App auf gemeinsame Verbindungen und gemeinsame Freunde
에볼루션코리아
077vrJpNM’`!
에볼루션카지노
219LjiDtu!}_
에볼루션바카라
845IkVACM’.!
에볼루션룰렛
267qsiNUk]”\
에볼루션블랙잭178NTgtPU#%*
As the lockdown restrictions were eased and certain sports and exercises were allowed again, I got out walking and kayaking, whereas Stacey got back on the golf course at every opportunity, where she is very accomplished (playing off a handicap of 5). She played 2 or 3 times a week with her friend Amy, who roped her into entering a mixed completion. Stacey eagerly told me about the comp coming up in 6 months and that she would be playing with Gary and Tony. Tony was new to me, an average player and someone making the numbers up. Gary I knew from way back, an excellent golfer and a bit of a ladies man. Despite knowing this, I didn’t say anything, I’m not the jealous type and have never had cause to be. Of the 2-3 rounds a week, Stacey and Amy played, Gary and Tony joined them, but again as they were playing as a 4, I didn’t worry unduly.
thank you for the article, it is very helpful, continue to improve your performance to make it more advanced
thank you for the article, it is very helpful, continue to improve your performance to make it more advanced
thank you for the article, it is very helpful, continue to improve your performance to make it more advanced
Saxenda is normally utilized for ongoing weight reduction or the board. Individuals of various age gatherings, including patients, utilized this medication with a low-calorie diet and expanded active work. To purchase Saxenda on the web, you ought to have a proper remedy.
Elite Toronto Airport Limo & Car provides best airport transportation service and luxury executive chauffeur services in Toronto. High Quality, Flat Rate & Easy Online Booking.
강남카지노바강남카지노빠,서울카지노,강남카지노
Such a Fabulous content to see on your site. I am generally a content reader, that’s why i would like to appreciate your effort. You did pretty well as i got a lot of fabulous information from your article.
It’s not identified how this medication aids individuals to lose excess weight. It may work by lowering your hunger, increasing the quantity of Vitality utilized by The body, or by affecting certain aspects of the Mind.
In addition, extending the use could also fuel the likelihood of establishing psychological dependence. So, ensure you vacation resort to it for any interval that best complements your overall health.
To provde the idea of Adipex Price, below we’re sharing the price of Adipex in a few primary stores, check them below:
The dosage and length of cure are according to your health care affliction and reaction to treatment method. Your health practitioner will regulate the dose to locate the best dose in your case. Focus on the threats and benefits, and the duration of phentermine procedure, with all your doctor.
Great post! i appreciate it.. thanks for sharing!
You can also visit my page ini here: top77
Great post! i appreciate it.. thanks for sharing!
You can also visit my page ini here: party77
Great post! i appreciate it.. thanks for sharing!
You can also visit my page ini here: top77
I know this website presents quality depending content and extra stuff, is there any other web page which presents these kinds of data in quality?
Nice articles, thanks for sharing! it’s means a lot?
you can meet me here too: leo77
amazing post on you..
check my page you can get some money lets Click : rio77
Thx a lot
Thank you great post!!
check my page you can get some money lets Click : HIT7
Font Changer
Font Changer I hope you guys know about font generators or changers. If not let’s know font changer is a website tool and app available online to change your text to cool fonts.
These font generators have already been added and developed font styles mostly which are highly used and well known. And it‘ll be a fantastic way to create the best and cool text without a single penny. Here we also have the best font generator suggestions for you guys.
https://fontgeneratorfancy.com/font-changer/
EVERCROSS EVO8E
EVO83 is the one electric scooter with the option of adjustable height, so one can easily adjust the size of this electric scooter. This feature is really beneficial for the taller ones. So overall, it’s a unique and rare feature you‘ll find in electric scooters. This function sure adds more value and customer appeal to this one.
https://best-electricskateboard.com/evercross-evo8e-electric-scooter/
I have a good web, you can open it, click the link : DOT77
Awesome POST i Like it!!!
check my page you can get some money lets Click : ANJAY77
Thx a lot
Your article was very good.Register now,don’t be late!!
NEO77
lucky for the zodiac LEO, because today is your lucky day. please see your luck,
do not miss. Warm regards!! LEO77
let’s see what’s in here, hopefully it can provide a solution and make you happy. see now : JAGOJP
this is awesome, very helpful website.
see also my website page, there are many interesting things in it HIT77 thank you.
cool blog, very helpful. See also my website: JAGOJP I hope we can help each other, thank you!!
Very helpful and useful website. see also my website: HIT77 a website that can make money with your luck. Thank You!!
WOAHH!!!
That is Amazingg, by the way guys
please.
check my page you can get some money lets Click : ASTRA77
Oh My God !!
Its Amazingg, by the way guys
please.
check my page, if you want to get some money lets Click : BOT77
cool.. interesting blog with a good way of writing, keep growing, never stop writing greetings of peace https://angelobc33c.bcbloggers.com/
Thank you great post!!
check my page you can get some money lets Click : PARTY77
Thx a lot
Great post! i appreciate it.. thanks for sharing!
You can also visit my page ini here: leo77
Nice Web,
but do you want to make money from home ?
Go to our website : BOT77
So you can get money
guys..i read your POST i like it.
you can check this Site
Click : SONIC77
thx a lot
a work must be appreciated, then an effort becomes one of our driving forces to achieve what we want,,
warm greetings from us and check what you want to know as your motivation:pom.live
There is a beauty site, come on, hurry up and visit. Click: BIO77
war138
good post thankyou for sharing +_+
Great post! i appreciate it.. thanks for sharing!
top77
Perfect web!!
But, do you want to make money?
= Let’s make extra money with us, side job from home
Recruitment here : Working
Job detail : Only need a phone and work from home
don’t miss this site, lots of prizes!! click : pin77
great site. see now!! click : PIN77
WOAHH, That was nice !!
by the way
please.
check my page you can get some money lets Click : FreeMoney
Great post! i appreciate it.. thanks for sharing!
You can also visit my page ini here: PIN77
This is the Great Post
Thanks for Sharing
i Like it so much
By The Way
Please Check my page to ini here thx a lot: BIO77
very good website, provides insight for its readers, must be appreciated. warm greetings from us and also visit our site: Happy-Indonesian-Independence-Day/17-August-1945 thank you very much everyone
Nice web!!
Hello Guys, do you want to have a money?
= Let’s make extra money with us, side job from home,
Recruitment here : Working
Job detail : Only need a phone and work from home guys
Awesome POST i Like it!!!
check my page you can get some money lets Click : PARTY77
Thx a lot
Awsome !!!
check my page and you will see what happens next . lets Click : HIT77
Thx a lot
Awsome !!!
check my page and you will see what happens next . lets Click : HIT77
Thx a lot
great idea, great article, keep writing and improving.
see also my profitable site https://thepsl8.com/unleashing-creativity-the-power-of-virtual-art-galleries-in-the-digital-age/
You can live in goodness, try to do it and get your luck today https://singawin.powerappsportals.com
great idea, great article, keep writing and improving.
see also my profitable site https://thepsl8.com/unleashing-creativity-the-power-of-virtual-art-galleries-in-the-digital-age/
let’s go to that link!! click : TOP77
Very Nice Excelent and Informative. Must Read it. Halifax Airport Taxi | Halifax Airport Cab Service
Permainan slot online yang saat ini populer dan banyak memberikan kemenangan besar adalah permainan slot di situs HOKIMULU. Selain itu situs HOKIMULU juga memberikan penawaran promo yang menarik untuk para member.
Saya pasti akan mengirimkan data ini kepadanya. Cukup yakin dia akan menjalani pemeriksaan yang sangat bagus. Terima kasih sudah berbagi! HOKIMULU menjadi yang paling terbaik dan tergacor 2024.
Hanya bersama dengan situs MASTERVIP138 kalian bisa merasakan kemenangan terbesar hingga mencapai ratusan juta rupiah dengan permainan yang terupdate dan di jamin aman 100%.