Your flaws are actually your strengths
Take a moment to think about what makes you unique. What’s that one thing that makes you feel different from other people in your life? Don’t let yourself get away with believing you aren’t unique, because that’s never true. I’m not talking about something that makes you one-in-a-million unique — this isn’t a fairytale, this is real life. I mean, what makes you stand out from your friends or coworkers? It doesn’t have to be anything extreme, but I do believe it’s there, and if you get honest with yourself, you believe it too.
Maybe there’s a trait you’re not thrilled about. Maybe you’re quiet and a bit uncomfortable in large social groups. Sure, that can be a disadvantage in certain situations, but that’s only one side of the story. People who feel socially awkward are usually a bit too “in their head” to act normally without overthinking things. Thinking too much feels like a flaw in those situations, but having a lot going on in your head can be a huge advantage in other parts of life. You might make a really good writer, comedian or entrepreneur. You probably have a great analytical mind that lot of people don’t.
Embrace your uniqueness
It’s far too common that people shy away from what they’re good at because they see it as a flaw. Whatever your unique “flaw” is, there’s a path where you can make it work for you. For my whole life, I’ve talked too much. If there’s silence, I fill the void by rambling, and when I catch myself, I feel embarrassed for not being able to just “play it cool”. I get so excited and then it’s almost out of my control. Until I considered writing and starting a podcast, it felt like a major personality flaw, but now my non-stop brain chatter is being funnelled into something productive and (hopefully) helpful to some people. I only had to learn how to reframe my flaw to make it something I’m proud of, and you can do the same. This is 2018 — whatever you’re passionate about, you can build a life around it with enough time and persistence.
Fortunately, everyone likes different things, so something you love might be something others can’t stand, and that’s an opportunity. Some people love numbers and problem solving, and some hate those things, but love gardening and cooking. Embrace your uniqueness and let it drive you forward into a place of fulfillment.
Failure is still progress
Even if you try something and fail, you’ll be in a much better place. If you want it badly enough, you’ll get back up and keep learning. If you realize it’s actually not what you thought it would be, then you can rest your mind knowing that you gave it a shot. If you fail initially at something you genuinely love, you won’t feel like giving up. You might be discouraged, but if you care about it, you will accept that everyone has to start somewhere. You’ll get back up and try again until you break through that barrier, and you’ll thank yourself for doing it.
Think about the difference between someone born into wealth and someone born into modest surroundings. The wealthy person may never really need to work. They might be able to relax their whole life, while the other has to work hard for everything. The thing is, working hard in life is like exercise for your mind. It strengthens your muscles for gratitude and fulfillment. Have you ever gone to the gym or done something physically exhausting? When did you feel better, before or after? The wealthy person’s life might be “easier”, but easy is the wrong goal. Fulfillment is the right goal.
Confronting your fear
Fear inside you is an indication of a deeper desire, and it’s not going away unless you face it head on. Ignored fears only fade when they turn to regrets. When you break down what you’re afraid of, the worst case scenario is never as bad as you think. Your fears almost never match up with what you’re losing by listening to those fears. There’s so much to gain and so little to lose, so take that next step today, whatever that is for you.
Pat Kelly is a self improvement writer, entrepreneur and host of The Pat Kelly Podcast. He’s passionate about helping people find true happiness right now and in the future. You can listen and learn more at www.patkellypodcast.com
Erin shows overscheduled, overwhelmed women how to do less so that they can achieve more. Traditional productivity books—written by men—barely touch the tangle of cultural pressures that women feel when facing down a to-do list. How to Get Sh*t Done will teach you how to zero in on the three areas of your life where you want to excel, and then it will show you how to off-load, outsource, or just stop giving a damn about the rest.
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