Years ago, I missed the bus. On purpose.
And even though I could do a quick sprint and catch the bus on time – I chose not to.
Because I could already picture the bus doors closing right in front of me. I could already picture everyone on the bus making fun of me for missing the bus.
So I chose the cool route – pretending that I was just casually strolling on the sidewalk. Super cool, right? (But of course, I had to wait 20 minutes in the cold to catch the next one.)
I lovingly call this my extreme case of what will others think of me worry.
Here are 12 signs you too might be caught in that what will they think worry web:
12. You find yourself trapped in life that sounded promising, but that doesn’t fulfill you. But you’re too afraid to make a change, because they might judge you (and you’d make a fool of yourself).
But the truth is – no matter how careful you are, you can not make everyone like you. Living a comment-proof life, always being careful not to ever upset anyone, is not possible.
And trying is just plain exhausting and draining. It’s a recipe for burning out, even though on the outside, you’re walking around with a big “I’m doing great!” smile.
It sounds counterintuitive, but the most effortless, nurturing way to build genuine connections and a life you love, is to be willing not to be liked by everyone.
You get to
- genuinely connect with people who get you, who love to talk about the same things, share the same interests or have different views that genuinely fascinate you,
- use your talents and strengths to create the work only you can create and be genuinely appreciated for it,
- do things that light you up, honoring your unique voice and flaunt your one-of-a-kind style, so you genuinely feel fulfilled.
So allow yourself to do your thing, regardless of what they might say.
And keep in mind that their “not liking you” is not a reflection of your value as a person. It’s just a reflection of their preferences, needs, expectations, ideas, beliefs.
By the way – on my way back home from work, I saw my bus just driving off (true story!). Technically, I had missed the bus again. But remembering that morning’s incident, I waved to the bus driver, thinking “What’s the worst that can happen? He says no, driving on with a bus full of strangers making fun of me. I’ll just catch the next bus and that’s that.”
And guess what – he opened the bus door and I jumped on. Now how cool is that?
An Bourmanne me
Grab her step-by-step worksheets and learn how to deal with criticism without taking it personally. Because life’s too short to keep worrying about what they’d think + forgetting about what you’re really longing for, right?