I turn 30 in a couple of months. And I lead a very different lifestyle from where I am.
Most friends my age are employed, working hard at their jobs for stability, happily settled down with someone or already married. Some of them have kids even.
I, on the other hand, am struggling as a writer, still a Bboy (breakdancer) and have actually recently gotten out of a serious relationship.
And not surprisingly, I get questioned, critiqued even by a lot of people. They wonder how I can lead such a lifestyle and why is it I’m not doing what everyone else is doing at such an “old” age.”
How do I do it? It’s easy.
1) I hang out with like-minded folks who inspire me
Some of them include people who range from ages 30 to 35. They still do what they love. One of them is a writer and another is a performer who teaches yoga in the day. They still know how to have fun too, so much so I even wonder where their craziness and zest for life come from.
Thus, it’s only simple logic: If I were to hang out with 30 year old people who are all getting married, I’d probably feel the pressure to do the same.
Since I don’t, I don’t.
So if you want to feel like your own person who lives by his desires and dreams, then get yourself consistently inspired with the right people around you. The people you’re with can make a huge difference in your happiness and outlook on life.
2) I’m sadly, uninspired by all the marriages around me
Maybe it’s just me, but most of the people I know who are hitched here are in marriages that are in shambles.
The sacredness of holy matrimony is spoiled as I know of couples who are cheating on each other or are in open regret as they tell me they feel like they got married too young or to the wrong person altogether.
As such, the idea that marriage is the milestone of adulthood and a base for a happy life ahead is bullshit to me. I don’t buy into it at all.
That is why I’m happy. I’m taking my time and I know that is okay.
3) I know deep down in my soul what is important to me
When I was 20, my dad died. He lost his long battle to ALS (Lou Gehrig’s disease.)
On the day that it happened, everything I ever felt was important became extremely insignificant in a split second. They include money, work, bills, anger towards people and myself, what others thought about me and other everyday worries.
Thus, I’ve since developed this belief that everything around me can turn insignificant instantly should such another major event occur in my life.
That’s not to say I’m paranoid though.
Chasing the things you think you need, or want in life will always only be just that, a chase. These things are very small in the grand scheme of things in life. If you stop to smell the roses and notice your surroundings from time to time, you can then start to realize how happy you get to be despite the age attached to you.
4) I’ve traveled and immersed myself in different cultures
And I plan to do more of it.
This is something you get from traveling and not simply vacationing. You get to meet different people and absorb different cultures.
What you believe in now is mostly derived from your surroundings and how you were brought up. It can be entirely opposite from other people from another part of the world.
What you think is a big deal, is not so for others. What you really want in life could be deemed nothing at all. What you take for granted today could me reasons why others out there would KILL just to want to be in your shoes for one day.
So don’t be too obsessed by the idea of feeling old because of age. Sometimes, it’s largely a matter of social expectations. Get out there and take in the world. You’ll learn that life is more than just about growing old.
5) I do what I want everyday as much as I can
I write everyday. I create ideas. I practice Bboying up to 15 hours a week.
These are all things I do out of my own will. No one else tells me to.
You’ve probably heard of it before: Do what you love and you won’t work a day in your life.
Let me extend that: Do what you love and nothing else around you matters.
And everyone can get in on this, young or old. It’s never too late to start.
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Alden Tan keeps it real at his blog and writes about motivation in unconventional ways. His two main passions are Bboying and writing. Check out his free report, 12 Things Happy People Don’t Give a F**k About!