self improvement

5 Tips To Become More Light-Hearted

Are you too serious? Maybe you get offended easily or judge others on autopilot? Or perhaps you just feel that you could benefit from ‘lightening up” and taking a more cheerful approach to your life?

We can get bogged down, solemn and stuck in our unhelpful ways, trudging through each day carrying on our habits from the day before.

But I’m here to challenge you to intervene and make some changes. It’s for your own good.

Here are 5 easy tips to become more light-hearted.

1) Come from love

Love is open, generous and most importantly, non-judgmental. This means that in order to come from love, you need to accept people as they are.

Notice how you label others or disapprove of their choices. Doing this only serves to make you feel tense, frustrated or critical and trust me, if you’ve been judging others for a while, you deserve to feel better… and you can!

Use this reminder: I can’t change you, I accept you as you are. I choose to feel good.

2) If it will be funny later, let it be funny now

Something goes unexpectedly wrong, your plans get interrupted, someone lets you down or, worst of all, one of your tech devices stops working! Tragedy!
Have you ever had a complete meltdown when something like this happened only to laugh about it when you shared the story later?

If it’s funny later, it can be funny now. I promise.

When you feel yourself getting sucked into meltdown mode, imagine yourself telling this story to a good friend in a year’s time. Are you laughing about it? If so then allow yourself to channel that hilarity into the present moment. Let it be funny now!

3) Ask questions

There is much to be gained from showing a genuine interest in another person. Not only do you open yourself up to learn something new, but you give the gift of your attention. Probably the greatest gift you can ever offer to anyone.

If you find yourself stuck in the story of your own life, feeling miserable about your situation then it’s unlikely that complaining about it is going to make you feel any better or deepen your relationship with your loved ones.

Instead, ask them about their life. You will relax and they will feel validated and appreciated. Engaging with others without the need to be heard in return is a noble skill, the mastery of which will leave you feeling surprisingly fulfilled.

4) Bring positivity with you

It can be so easy to fall into the pattern of expecting people, events and circumstances to bring us joy, we often forget that we can bring it too.

Make it your goal to fill your own life and the lives of those around you up with positivity. I’m not talking about approaching events with the attitude of “This better be good,” and then allowing yourself to be disappointed if it’s not as good as you’d liked it to be.

Instead it’s about getting your “happy” on and then not allowing anyone or anything to take it from you. That is your choice to make. Nobody forces you to give it away.

Consider something that we all deal with from time to time, waiting. If you show up with a positive spirit then waiting probably won’t bother you. But, if you let the situation sap your good vibes, then you make space for frustration and blame that will not only leave you in a bad mood but also make you fairly unpleasant to be around.

5) Smile

It seems obvious but most people don’t do it as often as they’d like to think they do.

Imagine that all day tomorrow you’re going to be filming a close up movie of your face that you can watch back. Check in with yourself throughout the day and consider how many times you smiled in the last 30 minutes.

Was it enough for you?

Smiling not only does wonders for your own body, it invites people to smile with you. It shares something special and magical. Think of someone you love, a funny story or something that you are grateful for and let it beam out of you through your smile!


Naomi Goodlet

Naomi Goodlet is a Mindfulness Crusader, Spiritual Rebel and Anxiety Hacker. She advocates for empowerment, wellbeing and freedom through connection with true values and with the present moment. To connect with Naomi visit her website.


Erin shows overscheduled, overwhelmed women how to do less so that they can achieve more. Traditional productivity books—written by men—barely touch the tangle of cultural pressures that women feel when facing down a to-do list. How to Get Sh*t Done will teach you how to zero in on the three areas of your life where you want to excel, and then it will show you how to off-load, outsource, or just stop giving a damn about the rest.

4 Responses to 5 Tips To Become More Light-Hearted

  1. Curious George says:

    What if they choose not to answer your questions? I feel like they only do the basics on a superficial level, which is okay with kids esp. when still getting to know them, but with adults a different story.

    Maybe because I’m new at work and not a cultural fit? I’ve only been there for a month, but at the same time, I don’t want to force anyone into conversation and make it not genuine, but more scripted. You know with the cliques in place.

    What do you suggest I do?

    I’ve tried everything from figuring out their love language to showing that I care, but they only seem to want to talk unless they have a problem or about work. Maybe they are private people unless around close friends? Or is this me worrying too much about what people say, do, and think when I feel like my effort isn’t being returned.

    I’m told I’m not being giving or open. I don’t know how much more giving and open I can be without not being myself.

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  3. Eliza says:

    Hi Curious George ,

    Sometimes that’s how good friendships or relationships begin. Sometimes it takes that initial uncomfortable small talk to break down peoples walls and barriers. I believe no conversation is ever wasted. I don’t see it as superficial as that implies that your intent is fake and purely self-seeking. But if you are genuinely interested in building connections at work then there is a level of effort that is initially required for some. Don’t rule out a partnership with someone just because you don’t click in the first or couple of instances. You never know what can happen in the future. Persevere, but also acknowledge your own boundaries and try your best not to cross them just to befriend someone who isn’t invested in you.

    Trust in your ability, and trust that their are people at your workplace who would like to be friends with you too. Or at least people who will make great buddies in the end.


  4. Underwood says:

    I try so hard to be happy and joyous, but I always return to being snarky and acting like no one can touch me……. So much happens at my house that it is so hard to be happy…. and I have lost possible relationships and even friends…. I know it sounds silly but I have forgotten how to be happy. I do have depression and I put up walls to keep people from seeing my pain in life and I am scared to be vulnerable. I need help, I don’t know how to be a happy person.


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