A lot of emphasis is put on the relationships we build with other people, but the only way to do that is to start a good relationship with ourselves.
Creating a healthy relationship with yourself is not about thinking you’re perfect and boosting your confidence 24/7. It’s more on being open to your flaws, owning up to your mistakes and eliminating your inhibitions. If you can’t even admit to yourself your own emotions and thoughts, then there’s a good chance that you can’t fully show who you are to others. Being open to yourself is a lot more important that being open to others.
It begins with self-acceptance. Though knowing we make mistakes and have flaws, too, acknowledging our own strengths and assets is crucial as well. But of course, all of this doesn’t happen overnight. There’s no clear-cut route to be more comfortable in our own skin, but there’s a process that every individual must go through.
1. Love what you do.
There’s a good chance that you’ll hate everyday when you’re stuck doing something that makes you unhappy. And when you hate what you’re doing, you somehow end up hating yourself. So instead of sulking and glaring at everything at work, decide to love what you’re doing or find something else that you can value. Life is too short to be stuck doing something that makes you hate life and the world. Find something you love and do it on a regular basis.
2. Embrace your flaws.
It’s okay to feel insecure that you don’t like your forehead or you can’t wear a skirt because of the big scar on your right leg. However, there’s no need to suffer in self-loathing because of it. And just because you don’t think it looks good doesn’t mean everyone else thinks so. You hair may be unruly 24/7, but it’s your hair and it makes you you. Truth be told, I love my overly bushy brown hair even though it looks ridiculous on most days because it makes me me. There will be days when looking at the mirror can be torture (another zit?!), but these flaws are normal and everyone has one. We can either be miserable because of our flaws, or embrace them because it’s a part of us. So I ask you this question, why choose to be miserable?
3. Keep on learning.
Lack of motivation makes one restless and uninspired. To avoid being in a rut, it’s best to keep moving, and more importantly, to keep learning. If possible, try to learn something new everyday. Join a class, learn a new life skill. Learn how to write a poem or how to knit a scarf. Cross out things off your bucket list. In every bit of learning, you do a bit of growing up.
4. Build healthy and lasting relationships.
There’s nothing wrong with being a social butterfly, but make sure that you invest more time on relationships that aren’t fleeting. When times are tough (and I tell you, it will), having a good relationship with family and friends will keep you afloat. Surrounding yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself is a great way to attract positivity into your life. Just make sure that you add brightness into their lives as well!
5. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
People make mistakes, and you don’t have to berate yourself every time you commit one. Mistakes happen so we can learn from it, not so we can bully ourselves into a corner. Don’t call yourself a failure just because you fail one time. Heck, even failing ten times or more doesn’t constitute a failure. View your mistakes and misgivings as simple life lessons that will lead to a better you. Let them be the building blocks of what make you a stronger individual.
6. Choose to be happy.
Be a firm believer that your happiness is entirely in your hands, because it is. Misfortunes happen, and we can do nothing about it. But instead of wallowing in self-pity or crying yourself to sleep every night for moths, be pro-active in choosing to be happy instead. But of course, to choose happiness isn’t just a mindset but a conscious and active decision to fill your life with activities and people that will make it easier for you to be happy.
7. Understand that you deserve to be loved.
Let people love you, because you deserve it and they deserve it, too. Open yourself to the possibility that you don’t need just yourself but also others to make life a little better. Independence is great, but learn that you can also depend on the people who are willing to give you a shoulder to cry on, a hand to guide you. Besides, there’s nothing wrong with letting more love into your life.
About the author:
Nicolette Morrison is a social media specialist and writer. She aspires to be a lifestyle editor of a national publication. For now, you can read her works at http://www.bestessays.com/. Connect with her on Twitter.