dos and don'ts of happiness

The 5 Dos and Don’ts of Happiness

“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.” – Denis Waitley

Happiness is probably the most common desire we all have. And people try everything to reach it.

But, eventually, they realize it’s not a destination, you don’t need to possess anything in particular to get it. It’s your right, your choice.

Happiness is right here, right now. You just need to eliminate all the things standing in its way – negativism, expectations, worries about the future and regrets for the past, countless desires, judging, comparing, trying to control things, etc.

So here are 5 simple things happy people do (and the things they don’t do) that can change the way you see things and live your life:

1. Do: Live in the present moment.

This moment is the only place you can feel alive, make changes, create your future, learn and grow, enjoy and appreciate.
It’s also where happiness is. Not later, not in past memories, right here and right now.

Don’t: Dwell on the past or worry about what might happen tomorrow.

Both are pointless and harmful.
Thinking about what was and experiencing the pain all over again causes us suffering. So does constantly trying to predict the future, control it and change it so that it can meet our expectations of how things should be.

And that’s why we live in such disappointment and are not satisfied with our life.

2. Do: Let go.

Letting go means accepting, being alright with things and events, letting them be and moving on without carrying any burden to the next moment.

Only then will you embrace freedom, joy and contentment.

Don’t: Hold onto things.

We’re too attached to people, objects, bad habits, places and so on. We think about them too much, worry, want to be with that person, at that place, or else, constantly.

This way we can’t improve, can’t grow spiritually and succeed in life. Because there’s always this thing we come back to. And progress can’t be made if we stay at one place.

Letting go is the answer. Being free from attachment and experiencing the present moment is our desired state.

3. Do: Spend time with happy people.

Happiness can be spread and shared, and being surrounded by positive people, who appreciate everything they have, know how to enjoy life, are smiling all the time and have fun, is what will make you one of them.

Don’t: Be around the wrong people for too long.

Some are just toxic – I mean the negative ones, who always want to take and never give, who talk about other people and events with jealousy and hatred, instead of discussing ideas.

It is said that we are the average of the 3-5 people we spend most time with. And if you find happy individuals and surround yourself with them daily, you’ll become contented with life too.

4. Do: What you love.

Find your passion and follow it.
It’s one of the things that can give meaning to your life.

Don’t: Do things you hate.

The average person has a 9-5 job he can’t stand, works for someone else and is surrounded by co-workers he doesn’t like, doesn’t have time (or desire) to do things he enjoys or try new and exciting stuff.

There are no hobbies in his daily schedule, no time for rest.
Living like that leads to misery.

5. Do: Accept.

Acceptance is the act of seeing things as they are and being okay with that. It means accepting yourself for who you are, and the people around you , the turn of events, and everything else.

You need to realize that it’s the best it can be for that exact moment. It may get better, but until then you can only be present and make the best of what is.

Don’t: Change and control.

These are two of the things that often lead to progress, but rarely to happiness.

Our constant need to have control over all the stuff in our life and to change people, means we don’t like what is now. We put too much pressure in trying to ‘fix’ it, interfere in the natural flow of events. But this never works out and we end up being disappointed, upset and without hope.

If you start doing the dos and eliminate the don’ts, you’ll find happiness. And it will be a different kind of happiness – the one that brings ease, peace, appreciation and deep contentment.

So with which of the dos and don’ts do you think you should start?

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Lidiya K. is a writer and blogger in the fields of self-improvement, life hacking, human potential and minimalism. She’s the creator of Let’s Reach Success , where her mission is to motivate and inspire and think of creative and unusual ways to overcome fear, procrastination, insecurity, clutter, failure, overthinking, discontent and much more.