If You’re Doing This, You’re Lying to Yourself About Being Happy

You’re saying you’re happy in your relationship, or marriage. You’re only saying it though. You feel comfortable. You got married. You bought a house. You even have kids. You say that you’re in love.

But you’re not happy because you don’t dare to face the truth. You know the love is already gone. You know the excitement has dried out. You’ve been doing what was expected of you.

If you want to be happy in love, then follow your heart. Have the courage to break away from a comfortable relationship. And do not rush into anything just because of circumstances. Your heart knows best.

You’re saying you’re happy with your job. You’ve studied hard and graduated with flying colors. You proceeded to get a job for stability and money.

But you’re not happy because the job is draining you. You’re no longer challenged. Everything in front of you are things you do not love or care for. And what’s more, your colleagues and boss are toxic.

If you want to be happy with the work you do, then start something on your own today, or find a job that truly fits you. If not, take it slow, but start now. Remember that you’re not your job. Your identity is not your job. What your colleagues or boss say to put you down are never true. Leave all work in the office, and go home everyday to lead your life.

You’re saying you’re happy with your family. They are after all, your family. They’re your mom, dad, brother and sister.

But you’re not happy because you deep down, you know your family isn’t good for you. Your family is toxic. They’re abusive.

Unfortunately in life, some people are not capable of love, even if you can call them your mom or dad. The sooner you realize this, the better. You need to step away.

You’re saying you’re happy with the friends around you. You get to call them friends alright. Some of them, you’ve known for many years since young.

But you’re not happy because they’re toxic. They’re annoying. They’re manipulative. They make use of you. They put you down all the time.

If you want to be happy, you need to surround yourself with positive relationships. You need to stand up for yourself and make sure your friends inspire you only. Also, note that people change. That is something you have to get over. You need to let go of friendships that were born years ago. If it’s not positive anymore, just move on.

You’re saying you’re happy from staying in one place all the time. It’s safe. It’s comfortable and you’ve everything you need at home.

But you’re not happy because you’re bored. And deep down you feel it. You feel that sense of regret and that your time is being wasted.

Truly, life is too short for a world this big. If you want to be happy, start opening your mind and expending your horizons. Go travel! Absorb different cultures and meet different people. It’s a guarantee that you’ll always come home to be more grateful for your life.

You’re saying you’re happy when deep down you know that you’re not. Not at all.

You’ve got problems, but you have never faced them head on.

You’ve issues, but you have never resolved them because you’re afraid.

You’ve dreams, but you have never went after them because you’ve been making up excuses.

You’re not happy with the person in the mirror, but you lie to him or her anyway.

Maybe it’s time for a change eh?

You deserve it.

Just for Pick The Brain readers

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Alden Tan is a passionate breakdancer and writer. He writes about honest and real self-improvement without the bullshit. Get his free book already!


Erin shows overscheduled, overwhelmed women how to do less so that they can achieve more. Traditional productivity books—written by men—barely touch the tangle of cultural pressures that women feel when facing down a to-do list. How to Get Sh*t Done will teach you how to zero in on the three areas of your life where you want to excel, and then it will show you how to off-load, outsource, or just stop giving a damn about the rest.

8 Responses to If You’re Doing This, You’re Lying to Yourself About Being Happy

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  3. AleksShamles says:

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