There are times in life wherein confusion reigns. Even if you already plotted your future and already set yourself on course to achieve your dreams, you’ll always have doubts. You’ll end up asking questions like:
Am I doing things right?
Is this what I really want?
Will my degree give me a stable job?
Being a worrywart about your future isn’t automatically a bad thing – it shows maturity and that you’re finally serious with your life. Regardless if you’re in the late stages of high school, college or building your career foundation, it may seem that you’re wandering aimlessly or going with the flow, not knowing where the current will take you.
Here are life experiences, suggestions and tips which will help you find a path you can truly focus on:
Ensure That Your Goals are Practical – and Reachable
People aim to be change makers, trendsetters, entertainers, or healers.
The notion of doing “whatever makes you happy” isn’t perfect. In order to succeed in life, you need a particular set of skills which can be used in the “real world”.
Will your chosen degree or career path put food on the table or pay your student loans?
There’s no way to determine this for sure, but there are people who regret choosing their degree, mainly because they end up “liking”something else in the future. As for college students, some end up switching degrees or majors every semester, putting them in a quagmire of confusion and delaying their progress.
When you’re in this stage, take seat and think. It’s never too late to change your goals. Bear in mind that what you want to become is not always the best for you. Take these into consideration and you’ll find the right path to tread in.
If You Don’t Like It, Love Your Effort
People end up working on jobs they don’t like – may it be they chose the wrong degree or they don’t have any choice but to walk on that path in order to earn.
If you’re one of these people, take a break. This is quite tricky: you are already treading on a certain path, but your thoughts are conflicted and you don’t being there in the first place. For example, you’re aiming to become a cruise ship chef, but ended up creating slide presentations for your corporate higher-ups.
Sure, this scenario is mentally draining and can take a lot out of you everyday, but the most important thing here is to love your labor. Even if you don’t like your job, you have to “love” the effort you put into doing it.
Compare it to studying: nobody likes hitting the books for six hours a day, but it’s important if you want to ace an exam or pass a subject. You need to do it, so you might as well do it in an ingenious or fun way – like joining a study group or a class.
Work or study smarter, not harder. Also remember: praise from your higher ups for a job well-done (and getting a paycheck at the end of the month) is an amazing reward.
Compromising with Parent Pressure
Parents sometimes urge their children to take a particular degree in college, which is never right. In this case, children will end up fulfilling their parents’ dreams, not their own. This in turn renders children to be confused, as this leads them to two paths: choosing what they want (with consequences) to make themselves happy or choosing what they don’t want and making their parents happy.
However, parents are smart enough to know what’s best for their kids, and they would want their money (if they’re paying for college) to end up giving their children a stable future.
I once had a conversation with my doctor concerning her eldest daughter. She’s a ballerina – and a successful one at that, considering she’s been in huge shows in the national theater in my country. She wanted to take a degree related to the arts, but her doctor dad would have none of it.
Regardless, he supported her all throughout, and ended up paying for her ballet shoes and her trips to and from the capital. In the end, they reached a compromise: she agreed to take up medicine, as long as her dad won’t stop her from doing ballet.
Another story includes a man who wanted to be a hairdresser. His parents were against it at first, but ultimately relented when he swore to finish his education degree. He still became a hairdresser, but with sterling credentials.
It’s important to reach a compromise with your parents. Mutual understanding goes a long way, and it will help both parties find the right direction.
Try, Be Rejected and Fail
Failure isn’t an obstacle: it’s a gift. It allows you to open your eyes and see the real world, know what you need to improve on, and what you’re capable of. You’ve never succeeded if you never failed in your life.
Bear in mind that the obstacles in life isn’t failure itself, but how you deal with it. People fail to move forward, rendering them blind, confused, and wandering around like a bottle in the middle of the ocean. They mope, get depressed, and take it as if they’ve got nothing to live for. Remember, the goal isn’t the reward: the journey is.
Failure breeds perseverance, and perseverance breeds success! Try different things, fail, learn, and ultimately succeed.
Mikhail Blacer is a sports junkie and the current sports editor of Scoopfed, an online magazine. He also works part time as a peer counselor in his locality. Strike up a conversation with him through his e-mail (email@example.com) and via Twitter.