self confidence

How To Stop Doubting Yourself

Has there been a time where you had no sense of direction?

It always went like this for me: Whenever there is a new goal, I tend to be very optimistic about it. I always get energized and can’t wait to get things moving.

These goals of yours can be anything, like losing weight, saving up money, or perhaps wanting to become famous one day! These are all very exciting things to look forward to, and most of us will be eager to get the ball rolling.

Then along the way, you are suddenly hit by an unexpected wave of doubts.

Doubts that make you think that everything doesn’t matter anymore. Doubts that make you think that you took the wrong road. Doubts that make you want to give it all in. It’s almost too hard to say “I will keep on going” and instead, quit.

So the number on the weight scale isn’t moving. Your bank account doesn’t seem to be increasing. Trying to become famous is almost a joke. It seems as if everything is doubtful.

On a day to day basis, it can be hard to keep yourself motivated. It can be hard to hold your head high up. At the same time, we all need to keep on going. What we think or feel at this very moment doesn’t matter. What does matter is how we respond to it.

I will feel stress, but stress is another way of letting me know that I’m breathing; that I’m alive.

Without stress, we would never know what feels good. The main important thing is that you do not give up. Because once you give up, then no one can help you.

I run a personal development website. Ironic thing is that there are times where I will feel unmotivated about myself. Even the toughest knight has his weakest moment. Even though I run such website, it doesn’t mean that I am forbidden to ever feel doubtful from time to time.

Just because you’re expected to do something, it doesn’t mean that you will have second thoughts and regrets.

But do not let these second thoughts and regrets make you quit what you started. You and I both need to keep going.

Here are the following things that kept my mind positive again—even after being unsuccessful and having doubts.

Take A Break

Sometimes it is our mind that goes against us. I will find that my time spent alone, doing absolutely nothing, will help get me straighten out.

I think. I ponder. Sometimes I will wonder why this is meant to be. Then I realized why I wanted this; why I started it.

Many people often quit at something they began. There may be several reasons, such as time constraint or other’s opinions that influences their belief system. Either way, it is no excuse.

Whenever you find yourself having doubts, take a break. Give yourself time to think. Ask yourself what made you get into this goal. It will get you to realize why you started it in the first place.

Finding support

It’s not always easy coping things alone. I find my own support through friends and reading other inspirational websites.

Sometimes we all need to hear something that will get us moving again. We just need to reach out to others who understand us. For many years, I thought holding this feeling inside would be fine. It’s not.

The good news is that there is someone out there who understands you. There is someone out there who has gone through what you are going through. It’s all about relating to that person for support, and perhaps inspiration.

That stress needs to be let out, so don’t hold it in.

It Starts With Yourself

Remember that you run your own life. You are responsible for any plans and actions that you make. In between that, it’s your belief system that takes the planning and action to execute itself physically.

If you cannot learn to support your own belief system, then others can’t expect to support you.

As humans, we will face time where there is no sense of direction. There will be a time where we will all reach a low point in life. From a larger scale, it’s not what you feel during these moment that matters. It’s how you make out of it that determines the real result.

The next time you ever doubt yourself, remember that it is only temporary. Don’t make it into a permanent thing by acting on it unwisely. Give yourself time and support, because the decision that you make today will affect you forever. 

 ——–

Dennis Do is the founder of Self Exceed.com. He talks about anything relating to self improvement that comes from his personal experiences. His advice tends to help others while trying to display a sense of humor and seriousness. He can also be found on his YouTube channel and various social media.

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  • Vj

    You make so much sense ! Thank you. But I would like to ask you a related thing. What if the low strike again too early from the last one ? Where am I lacking ? Cause I find myself come out of my lows quickly, but they are like 3 lows in 10 days.

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

       Hi Vj, glad I can relate to you.

      It’s normal that you may find yourself down the slumps again. I do too as well. But what I’ve found that really helps me stay motivated longer was to follow those who have already achieved what I’m going for.

      It’s all about getting inspired. You have to train your mindset to keep getting back up no matter what.

  • http://www.upbeatbrain.com/ Dr. Mike

    I also find that there’s a balance on self-doubt. I agree that we all face it from time to time even on the most desirable paths. If that self-doubt, though, arises over and over, perhaps the path needs a little adjusting. When we pursue things that we really believe in, the self-doubt about the worth of projects should be far less frequent.

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

      Agreed Dr. Mike. I think if what we’re pursuing isn’t what we really wanted, then a little bit of a thought would help.

  • Hadeel

    Thanks a lot ! 
    I needed these words :)

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

       No problem! :)

  • http://www.everythingaboutmotivation.com/ Petra Botekova

    Great article, Dennis! All of us experience lack of motivation on our journey to success from time to time. But it´s still us who choose a response to our doubts. Giving yourself some time to think about why you started in the first place keeps you going when nothing else can. Thanks for sharing!

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

       I agree Petra!

      Sometimes a little break does the mind wonders. It’ll all start to come back to us on why we did it in the first place.

  • http://twitter.com/Mark_Bowness Mark Bowness

    Dennis, great post. Thank you for sharing. Whenever I give up the most important thing for me to remember is ‘perspective’, we live life once, only once. What do I want to be known for? Why am I here? What is my legacy? As soon as I start asking these questions I am re-ignited with complete and utter passion.

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

       I like that Mark. I often feel the same way too. I don’t care so much about me as I do about others.

      When I am gone from this world, I want to know one thing: Did I change any life, or was I ‘just’ another average Joe?

  • http://www.you-refined.com/ Giuliano

    Great post Dennis. All of the tips you mentioned would definitely be helpful in maintaining motivation levels when doubt rears its ugly head.

    I would also add to your already great list, your end goal. People come up with goals but really do not visualize themselves with the benefits of  the goal once they bear the fruits of their labor. If you are really passionate about what you want to become/accomplish, it provides that necessary nudge when the going gets tough.

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

      Thanks for your input Giuliano, my list is now perhaps better with yours added :)

      I definitely agree that it will tremendously help anyone who ‘believe’ it first before ‘seeing’ it happen. It has always helped me to see myself in my end goals while bearing hard labors.

  • Trollface

    trololololololol action trollcake is alive muhahah

  • http://www.rpsmiles.com/ Del Mar Dentist

    At some point, we tend to doubt ourselves especially when we feel like nothing is going right. But with faith and motivation, you will be able to get back on your feet again. 

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

       Exactly! It’s all about never giving up and going through failure.

  • http://www.suzanne-jones.com/ Suzanne Jones

    Another good point is to reflect on the times when you were achieving or doing what you wanted and get back in that state. All the feelings and motivation will come flooding back.

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

       Yes! I find that looking back on your accomplishment will get you motivated again :)

  • Rosan_golay

    Hi Dinnis Thank you very much for your Thoughts

    • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

      I’m just glad to relate it to everyone that I can :)