happiness

5 Ways To Stay Happy No Matter What Happens

Most people have no control over their emotional well-being. They feel ecstatic when good stuff happens and depressed when things go wrong. Their lives are roller coaster rides: sometimes up, sometimes way down.

But what if you could be happy no matter what happens?

You’d stay calm when your car breaks down and your boss shouts at you. You’d stop feeling lonely when there’s no one to talk to on a rainy day. You’d never lose sleep over a relationship that isn’t working out.

If being in command of your emotional state sounds good, take charge of your life with these 5 easy tips.

1. Stop Chasing and Start Living

Many people feel they need something – more money, new clothes, better relationships – to make them happy. They think: “If only I had that other thing, I would be complete”. Instead of enjoying life, they chase a vague idea of happiness.

But even when you get everything that’s supposed to make you happy, life will have ups and downs. Today your car breaks down; tomorrow you pull your calf muscle. If you look hard enough, you’ll always find reasons to be miserable.

So stop chasing; start living. Wanting more is fine, but don’t forget to relax and enjoy life for what it is – in the present.

2. Assume Responsibility

We often blame other people, circumstances and even objects for our problems. “I’m this way because my dad didn’t love me enough”; “I hate my stupid car for breaking down all the time.”

But life is full of different people and situations: some are good and some are bad. Unless you assume responsibility for your life, you’ll always be at the mercy of those circumstances.

Instead of blaming others for what’s wrong in your life, focus on what you can do to make things better. Never sulk and try not to feel sorry for yourself too often. It’s your responsibility to make yourself happy: nobody else’s.

3. Stop Seeking Stimulation

We live in a world of endless stimulation. Between movies, video games and the internet, something exciting’s always going on. Sometimes, this makes us feel bored and restless when we run out of stuff to do.

If you want to be happy, overcome this addiction. Develop the ability to enjoy life in its entirety – even when the stimulation stops.

Appreciate the sky you see on your way to work each day. Cherish each moment you spend with the people you love. Savor every bite of food you get to eat. Enjoying every experience will give you many new reasons to be happy.

4. Take Action

Taking action is the logical consequence of assuming responsibility for your life (Point #2).

When you want to lose weight – start jogging. Someone’s being rude to you? Tell them to stop. If you’re unhappy with your job, start looking for a new one. Get behind the steering wheel of your own life!

This site has plenty of advice that will help you take action the smart way. Educate yourself and commit to find happiness no matter what it takes. With enough hard work and dedication, you really can create the life you want.

5. Expect Nothing

We expect others to treat us better than we treat them. We work out a few times and stress because we don’t instantly look like models. We want to live like rockstars, ignoring the fact that only a few people reach that level of success.

In short, we tend to have unreasonable expectations. The difference between what we feel entitled to and what we actually get is the source of much misery.

Accept life in its entirety; stop thinking in terms of what should be and accept what is. When you live without entitlement, every good thing becomes a wonderful surprise. Even better, expecting nothing means never being disappointed.

Conclusion

At the end of the day, bad things will happen to you. You will have highs, lows and lots of mediums in your life. You’re only human, just like everybody else.

But follow the 5 tips in this post and you’ll be well on your way to staying happy – no matter what happens.

 

Resource Box:

George P.H. helps people get more dates, find rock-solid confidence and turbocharge their lives with awesomeness at The Man-Up Blog. You can also tweet George anytime – he’d love to hear from you!

 

 

  • http://hackmymodernlifestyle.com/ Hack My Modern Lifestyle

    Excellent post. But there is another thing that you can do to be happy no matter where you are. That is learning to accept. More often than not, the reason why we are unhappy is because of the expectations that we have set for ourselves. Once you learn to accept whatever happens and “Do not expect anything”, you will then attend true happiness. Because there is no more expectations. 

    • Colinr

      Read point 5 again and you will see this is covered…..paragraph 3  “Accept life in its entirety” I’m not being critical, just thought you might have missed this valid point.

      • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

        Colin, very astute of you to point that out, you totally got me! 

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      Absolutely. Resistance is the biggest obstacle to happiness. I was trying to express that as the underlying message in all 5 points, and I’m glad you pointed it out :). 

  • http://www.2knowmyself.com/ Farouk

    that’s right
    everyone should read this post
    thanks for sharing 

  • Yaseen

    Superb George, Thank you for the post.

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      @1d54b087f8ad79151e4166e0940f40e5:disqus &@4c9cbb012bf5336d0011f2ad27c066d2:disqus  -  Thank you for reading! 

      • Ramya

        George How would i appreciate for your post and the wonderful conversation around by all … So far i have created 2 Emotions for the People around me … they stay happy around with me or they get envy for me being happy :) Either ways im proud.. I feel life has to move on… I know a technique which i feel like sharing may i would help.
        1. Close your Eyes
        2. Imagine that you walk in the Garden
        3. Seize the moments which are painful & hurting in your sideways
        4. You continue walking
        5. Change the seized moments to black & white
        6. Continue the walk
        7. Just Smile and walk
        8. Feel the happiness
        Remember you are always deserved to be happy :) Stay calm … Things will pass as you are moving on…..

  • http://beingjune.wordpress.com/ Julia

    This is a great list.  I tend to struggle with #4, in terms of sustaining said action.  But I’m working very hard to be content where I am, and it’s opening my eyes to the beauty of a simple life.  I have a long way to go, but it encourages me knowing that I’ve at least started the journey.  Everyone should read this post.

    • Colinr

      Well done Julia! As Lao tZu said, “Journey of 1000 miles begins under your feet” and yu have begun your journey! Let your feet take you to wonderful places! I too ahve a problem with action, but. like you , I admit it and this is the key ~recognize the prob and then it can be dealt with. Good wished to you!

      • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

        Lao Tzu had a lot of smart stuff to say; just used a quote of his in a post yesterday.

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      The reason many people give up is because they place extravagant demands on themselves and crumble under the pressure. Paradoxically, letting go of expectations makes it a lot easier to take sustainable action! 

  • http://manifestingyourtruelove.com/ Lorii Abela

    Another great post!. 
    Thank you for sharing these tips. And you were right about #5. Oftentimes we expect too much that leads us to disappointments. I believe we should stop if not minimize that though. 

  • http://www.healthyzine.net/the-myth-of-multitasking/ Jcrosskey@Healty Zine

    Great article! I think the most important step mentioned is to take action. Ultimately, we are most of what happens to us. While we can’t control the economy or other people, we can control how we feel about it and what we do about it. Someone broke into the house I was  moving out of the other day. It really upset me, partially because of the invasion of privacy but also because the owner is a close friend of mine. When I told my friend he sort shrugged it off and started boarding up the window. He didn’t stew about it, just took action. So much of life is attitude.

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      I love people who think and act like your friend, they’re inspiring. Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power Of Now” helped me move in that direction. Now I try to focus on the “now” and take action instead of being upset about the past, “what could have been,” etc. Check it out if you get the opportunity! 

  • http://www.DepantsingTheClones.com/ Gary Korisko

    Great post. “Stop Chasing” is my favorite, but keeping all of them in mind is great advice.

  • Yeshe Zhonnu

    Many of these things I’ve learned through Buddhism.  Very helpful insights especially about not chasing (cessation of clinging desire) and not expecting ( being able to live happily without a dose of “something’s missing”)

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      Hello, Yeshe Zhonnu. You’re right – I think all 5 principles can be traced to Buddhism. But in the end, most religions and philosophies take their students to the same place of calm and wisdom if studied right. 

  • Jlauro

    Very good…

  • Uday

    Nice post Indeed!!

  • http://pristineperception.com/ Suzanne

    Good post. We must stop focusing on what we consider bad and just walk through it. In my life I have found more good things than bad once I stopped being the victim. Another good thing is putting yourself in someone else’s shoes. Obviously if they are arrogant there is a reason. The choice is yours if you continue to be around them. If you have no choice because it’s your boss, you still have a choice. Try to understand him/her, or find a new job.

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      Couldn’t have said it any better! Especially about putting yourself in another person’s shoes. Helps put many things in perspective and stops you from judging people (thereby feeding into your ego). 

  • Sunny bubble

    Why should stop? 
    ‘Chasing dreams’ and  ’having expectations’  it’s a part of our life, and they are driving me to be a person as best as I can. If you never experience ‘sadness & disappointment’, how you will understand ‘happy’ and appreciate ‘the happy life you have’. I respect both the happy moments & the difficult experiences in my life. Try make them balance!

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      Hey, Sunny. Chasing dreams is definitely important. Sadness and disappointment, however, are optional. You can make an effort to reach your goals every day and still expect nothing, accepting life for what it is. I find it a better and easier way to live – but in the end, we all make our own choices. 

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      Hey, Sunny. Chasing dreams is definitely important. Sadness and disappointment, however, are optional. You can make an effort to reach your goals every day and still expect nothing, accepting life for what it is. I find it a better and easier way to live – but in the end, we all make our own choices. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/chris.blevins.902 Chris Blevins

    Yes..I can confirm that this works. Now and again I need to remind myself of one or more of the points mentioned.

  • Fivefullons

    Happiness is a choice. It is so wonderful! For no reason at all you can choose to be happy. The feeling is in your own mind, YOU choose to feel it and only you can make it happen. Its like a switch in your brain that you can turn on right now if you choose to. 
    This list is amazing and I believe and already try to do all these things and I believe they are steps to achieving peace and in such a state it is easier to feel happy.  

    What have you got to loose? try it for one minute and then if you don’t like it you can go back to feeling the way you did before. You don’t have to think of any particular thing to feel happy just decide to be happy.  Things are much easier when you are in control of your own mind. 

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      It’s true – happiness IS a choice, as is everything else in life. An earlier poster mentioned that sadness is a natural part of life, and I used to feel the same way – until I gave this way a try. Haven’t looked back since :). 

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      It’s true – happiness IS a choice, as is everything else in life. An earlier poster mentioned that sadness is a natural part of life, and I used to feel the same way – until I gave this way a try. Haven’t looked back since :). 

    • http://batman-news.com rynha

      who are you? I have read thousands of articles about happiness but never felt good at all. but reading ur article just made me happy n i m smiling. u r right. that was exactly what i wanted 2 read. God bless u. Tc

  • http://glynisj.com/ Glynis Jolly

    We must be on the same wavelength right now. I just published a post along the same lines as yours. I do think yours is written better than mine but then, I’m not a professional, just a hobbyist.

  • LYKA

    NICE

  • LYKA

    NICE

  • Abyooda

    that’s pretty logic :)
    but i think taking action is the key for happiness.

  • Karen

    I love this post! It reminds me of some of Russell Simmons’ work, which I read somewhat religiously lol #2, assuming responsibility is so important to me. Something didn’t work, well it isn’t directly because of my childhood experiences or a past relationship, or even what has happened to me today. These are all factors but don’t determine your destiny or your future, I absolutely hate when people don’t take responsibility for their contributions to “areas of improvement” and get stuck in a certain place. Tomorrow(or today) this is always a new chance to make things better, to improve yourself, and to just take action!

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      Russel Simmons’ repeated success in life isn’t accidental – I’m sure he cultivates positive traits and ways of thinking. I’m surprised anyone else follows him nowadays, though – I was sure I’m the only one! 

      Check out this quote by Tony Robbins, it fits really well with what you’re saying:
      The past does not equal the future. Because you may have failed a moment ago,all day today, or for the last six months, or for the last sixteen years, or for the last fifty years of your life doesn’t mean anything. All that matters is what are you going to do now?

  • sanjayhypnoticlaws

    Great post – another thing to consider is your physiology, posture,  body language and how you are carrying yourself.  I notice this with kids a lot (all the way up to teenagers) that if you just get them to adjust their posture – stand up straight, smile, look up more than you look down.  Amazing things happen!

  • sanjayhypnoticlaws

    Great post – another thing to consider is your physiology, posture,  body language and how you are carrying yourself.  I notice this with kids a lot (all the way up to teenagers) that if you just get them to adjust their posture – stand up straight, smile, look up more than you look down.  Amazing things happen!

  • http://www.100goldenkeys.com/ Mia Pratt

    Good points. I would like to add that if we can overcome some of this material desire and take more time to cultivate friendships and providing value for other people which we can get something for in return, our happiness will be genuine and not a fleeting mood.

  • http://twitter.com/PDMusicComposer Paul Doolan

    Yep, love this article. Reminds me of a documentary I once saw which included a brief meeting with a Sami resident deep in the arctic, who made the comment “Think less, feel more”. Love it. 

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      I envy your travels; also, funny how the simplest phrases can be the most profound. 

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  • Cewashington

    Practical advice….

  • Dee

    I came across this post today linked from NAIDW, National Assoc. of Injured and Disabled Workers, where I had just posted about how bad things are for me and my family right now.  I’ve been so depressed.  As I read this article, I thought, can I do these 5 things to change my life?  After all, it’s my mind, right? I can’t control anything that has happened but can I change my focus using these as a guideline?   I will print this and re-read it when feeling this way and see if the power of the mind can rule my broken body (which just means I’m disabled).  Thank you for the inspiration. :)

    • http://twitter.com/george_tmub George P.H.

      Dee, thank YOU for the inspiration. It means a lot to me that my post helped you, even if only a little. 

  • http://www.motivation.net.au/ Motivating

    This is helpful information for me. I am happy
    to find your distinguished way of writing
    the post. I will be happy to see you writing on “5 Ways To Stay Happy No Matter What Happens”. Now
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  • http://personal-growthnow.com/happiness-faith-and-hope/ Lct1947

    I love number 1.  That is simply why so many of us waste so much valuable time.  We want more, not taking care of the moment and what we already have.  It is such foolishness that leads only to that state of always wanting more!  Wonderful post.  Thank you for sharing.

  • http://personal-growthnow.com/happiness-faith-and-hope/ Lct1947

    I love number 1.  That is simply why so many of us waste so much valuable time.  We want more, not taking care of the moment and what we already have.  It is such foolishness that leads only to that state of always wanting more!  Wonderful post.  Thank you for sharing.

  • http://selfexceed.com/ Dennis

     Great advice George, these are things that I need to work on instead of chasing happiness.

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  • LovieMoon

    Thank you so much for writing this post!!
    Breathe, Release, Accept & Enjoy!

  • Ant

    Wow great points. 5 mins of reading gave me a whole new outlook on life. Thank you I really needed that. Enjoy life for what it is and not for what I think it should be. Thank you thank you thank you

  • Ppaudz

    I also say that if I had one more thing I would be happy. But if I really do think about it I already have everything that I want. When you just think about everything that you have and you learn to be grateful for it you will find yourself to be looking at everything differently. You find more pleasure in the little things, for example, I live in a dorm room with 6 girls and it could get pretty hectic so when I have that quiet minute alone doing nothing im so grateful for it and thats not something that could be bought its just finding sincere appreciation for everything. 

  • ahsan hussain

    Totally clear delivery of the post idea. I like your work.
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  • http://www.facebook.com/lugalia.joseph Lugalia Joseph

    The reason why most people are unhappy is because they have not learnt how to just be. They spend a lot of time doing and looking for what to have and in the process they get dislocated from who they are. That is what unhappiness is all about. Walking besides oneself. Once you connect with who you are you will be happy no matter what.

  • Vinay Chakawri

    I had this awesome feeling of happiness when I came from SKVR (Foundation for Art Rotterdam) right a short week after the play when we did a dance from it and since then I really don’t know how I feeled about life before that. I see everything from the bright side.

  • Felix

    Its good but how to recover family problems i think u dhould write about that i m frustrated and feeling like die alone

  • http://www.stopstressandanxiety.com/ Mulyadi Kurnia

    I practice a combination of the five tips mentioned, which I found to be very good. Specifically, for me, I learn to be more detached from the ups and downs of my life. Meaning to say that I try not to get too excited over good stuffs happening or get too depressed over bad things happening. By instilling more equanimity into my life, I find that my sense of well-being improves. Just to share.

  • Guest

    weed helps too.

  • Prachi Tyagi

    Amazingly executed in the portrait of words, i am a pessimist. often i get bothered and that too very easily, i just want a suggestion or a consultation. but i really wish to stay happy suggestions are welcome. i really want to live. Live what we call life.

  • Chandra sekhar

    Its an excellent description……thanbk u so much

  • tanu

    thnk u so much 4 dis post
    dis is sumthing wt i really wanted
    thnxx alot :)

  • munesh
  • san

    thank YOU!

  • http://milano.bbakeca.com/ BBakeca

    Great article! I love it!

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  • Maheshwar Salaria

    exactly to the point….very well explained…

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  • Zoey Susannah

    its amazing….thank you so much!!!
    you made my day @twitter-287769436:disqus

  • yennyee

    Pt.#5 Expectations are like wishing for things to happen to you. When you wish upon a star is expecting some one else is going to make it come true. That some one else is you.

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  • Hardeep singh

    Reading the above 5 things definitely will give moments happiness , but i don’t think that people those who are not happy have not thought about these things . I feel that when person is not happy he always have something to blame and definitely finds a reason of not being happy. But the point here is , is the reason found really is the actual reason for not being happy or there is something else? The problem with human being on the earth is that he never and can never understands the nature.

  • Hardeep singh

    There is always two sides of everything Day and night ,black and white , happiness and sadness , Birth and Death , Entry and Exit . The problem with human being is that he only accepts entry not exit . Human being only accepts Birth not death . There is always night first then a day . If there is no night then there is no value of day . If there are no sorrows then there is no value of happiness . We go for movie but we only like the movie and its a hit when there is everything in it , love , action , drama, comedy if its one way traffic only love and love then definitely its a flop. So life is also like a movie its only life when it has everything . So one should understand that if there is a day then definitely there will be night after that.

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  • Noctowl

    I already understand one thing that keeps me happy I’ve always seen worse

  • wy

    It is easier said than done. Every day it is a challenge.

  • Snehashree hota

    i really like this post and along with teaching ,it also was a source of fun, when i could read myself between the lines. it feels like the writer is also one among us in search of a happy way to life and he has it here very well put up… we meet many people everyday and what connects us with them is how we justify the world around in our terms.it is u who decides how u connect… perceive it with positivity and u shall end up rewarding urself… take care

  • mahlife

    I hv a question i didn’t knew where to ask so here it goes i earlier enjoyed life to its fullest but now i m not able to live it optimistically rather negative people around me hv started gaining my feature
    N one more thing people think i nvr hv trouble coz i smile at difficult situations so what could be the suggestions nd probable reasons

  • Purple

    nyc article.. :)

  • JD

    This post really helped me a lot. My family isn’t in the best situation at the moment and neither am I. I get depressed alpt but always keep it in. I’ve tried reading so many post on how to just stay happy and yours is the only one that really helped me, thank you

  • pauliewaulie

    I need some advice . My source of unhappiness is school, sometimes i lack motivarion, i feel like i am accomplishing nothing ,i struggle with grades. I strive for As yet i get less than Bs. Im too focused on making others happy that i forget the importance of mine and id like to know how i can make new friends males and females.

    • http://www.RebootAuthentic.com/ Gary Korisko

      “unsubscribe”