Lack of confidence, shyness and getting paranoid over the slightest thing.
Are you suffering from any of the above?
You look ahead in your life and just cower at the thought of challenges coming up, as if you already know you’re going to fail.
When you meet new people you make a complete fool of yourself, sputtering nonsense from your mouth.
When a friend stops talking to you for a day or two, your mind goes crazy with thoughts that perhaps you did something wrong.
Is this your life?
Caring about what others think getting you down
The problem with most people is that they care too much about what others think.
It’s a very common psychological issue among us.
More often than not, when most think about what others think of them, it’s always on the negative side. We tend to worry about others’ opinions and pre-judgement as if we’re doing something wrong.
Thinking about what others think brings you down as you start to focus your energy on others and not yourself.
We can’t help it
And this is a very uncontrollable issue.
It’s literally in our subconscious.
We’re only human and we just want to be happy. We want to be well-liked by those around us and not create any unnecessary problems.
Not all of us have such great self-mastery that we can be completely in our own world.
Furthermore, there is this conflict in the mind when it comes to caring about what others think, that is, what may actually happen to us when we don’t care about what others think.
Society has a lot of rules to follow in order to survive, so how can we not care about what others think?
Real care for yourself and mind lies right in the middle
There is an intricate play when it comes to caring about what others think.
Simply out: You should both care and not care about it.
When you should not care:
Is caring about what others thinks taking control of your life?
If your thoughts are going awry and getting out of control, then it’s time to step back and really reflect on why you’re doing this. I am talking about getting paranoid in your head, where you care so much about what others think you’re literally making things up!
Stop caring when it’s pulling you down. There’s no reason to.
Stop caring when your full potential and capability cannot be reached.
Why let the words or looks from others affect you?
There’s no reason why you cannot be yourself and hit your highest self just because of others.
You’re you. So be it.
But the reason why you need to care:
Is that we still play by the world’s rules.
You need to understand the concept of face value. Not caring about what others think is good for you, but it’s also very important to understand what you’re portraying to the world.
People are judgemental, face it.
You do not want to come across as extremely deviant or even rebellious.
That may sound discouraging and even contradictory, but let’s take it to a more practical level.
Ask yourself: Can you really handle the additional stress of say, quitting your high-paying job to follow your dream? Can you take the sudden drop in income and what others’ have to say?
Would you walk into a friend’s house and start making condescending remarks of the interior?
No, that’d be rude.
So you see, we’re the guests.
Remember, we live in this world still. So give yourself the extra trouble.
Balance is the key
Caring about what others think is a playful issue.
As much as you want think about it and even control it, you still do it anyway.
It’s best to have the right balance in your mind.
Know when to care, and know when to not care.
This’d definitely allow you to have an easier life as you go along, but yet slowly pave the way to self-realization and achieving your full potential.
Just for Pick the Brain readers
I’ve put together an email course for people who’ve trouble blocking the noise out. You know, when you’re constantly thinking about what others think.
This course was specially made by me for you. Not many people have gotten the chance to see it yet, so I’m hoping to spread it around, starting with you guys.
Head over to Alden Tan, drop in your email address and I’ll send this course over to you.
-Find out how to gain the confidence to do what you love.
-Learn how to talk to others and be yourself.
-A comprehensive list of things you can tell yourself, to be yourself!
This email course is only available through this link to Alden-Tan. Thanks for giving it a chance!
Photo credit: “Frustrated Girl‘ by Big Stock