self improvement

4 Life Lessons From Realizing a Loved Will Go Soon

For the past week I’ve been going to the hospital everyday.

My grandfather is there. And he’s not doing well. In fact, the rest of us in the family are prepared for the inevitable. He too, is simply waiting. In fact, he was asking some of us grand kids when we were going to get married, to which he would continue on to say, “I will not be around then.”

It’s a really surreal feeling.

As much we expect it, it’s still extremely unexpected. That’s life. All of us are realizing that someone we grew up with will be gone soon.

The surreal brings a lot of life lessons…

1) Health first, family second. Everything else can wait

This is something we always forget. In the rush to live by the rules of life, we’re constantly distracted by work, money, career, pleasing others etc.

We take it for granted that we’d be always be healthy and that it wouldn’t happen to us.

But just as how life is real, death is also real.

There’s nothing funny about failing health. Indeed, we all have a time limit since we have to grow old. And hopefully, your family will be there by your side when your time is up.

So please don’t take any of this for granted. They may not seem important to you everyday, but eventually, they will be the most important in your life.

2) When it’s your time to go, it’s time to go. So have a good run

Without going to deep here,  I personally believe that both life and death are mysteries. No one can ever perfectly solve them.

Yet, not all lives are equal, in length at least. When it’s your time to go, it’s time to go. Otherwise, why is it a soldier can go to war and come back in one piece while an innocent person can die suddenly from say, a tree falling on him? (true story of a friend’s brother of mine.)

But I don’t think life is about trying to solve those mysteries. It’s about living a life of no regrets. You’d want to live according to your own terms so that you can look back and never ask, “What if?”

You’ve got to have a good run at life.

So live according to your own terms. Don’t live by the rules thrown at you. Don’t live to meet the expectations of others. Have a good run.

3) Sometimes, you’re just not as strong as you think you are

Since visiting the Intensive Care Unit so many times this week, I’ve come to develop a respect for the people who in there.

The nurses, doctors and even the receptionists. They’re strong people who deal with the sick, the dying and yep, death.

I don’t think I can last long in there. Just watching sick and old people on their beds made me really uncomfortable, so much so I always question the morbid nature of people and life itself.

Many people think that it’s always about living life to the fullest. I say too, it’s about recognizing everything that exists in life and not shoving things under the rug.

Truly, things like this wake you up in life. So be reminded that there’s always more to live in your life.

4) You see the deeper and real side of people 

Frankly, sometimes my mom annoys me. But seeing her try to take care of her own dad in the hospital really got to me.

My other little cousin, who also annoys me sometimes really showed his emotional side. He’d cry whenever we saw our grandpa.

I think in life we’re all wearing masks. These masks come in the form of jobs, the cars we drive, our moods and even the clothes we wear. But when the important things in life happen, our deeper side surfaces.

Perhaps we’d all be happier if we can see each other’s deep side. Otherwise more than not, we’re just always too busy, in a rush and making ourselves extra sensitive and petty.

If the important things in life are inevitable, we ought to be more true to ourselves. We ought to be nicer to one another know that each of us has our own story.

The world will be a better place that way.

In the mean time, have a good run. Hope you liked this article.

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Alden Tan keeps it real at his blog and writes about motivation in unconventional ways. His two main passions are Bboying and writing. Check out his free report12 Things Happy People Don’t Give a F**k About!


Erin shows overscheduled, overwhelmed women how to do less so that they can achieve more. Traditional productivity books—written by men—barely touch the tangle of cultural pressures that women feel when facing down a to-do list. How to Get Sh*t Done will teach you how to zero in on the three areas of your life where you want to excel, and then it will show you how to off-load, outsource, or just stop giving a damn about the rest.

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