how to be liked

How To Be Liked By Everyone

You feel awkward when around people. You don’t know what to say and you can’t help but think what others are thinking about you.

As much as you want to be friendly to those around you, you end up becoming “that guy” (or girl), the socially awkward one who ends up standing on the outskirts of the crowd.

And you’re wondering if others are talking behind your back or thinking how weird you are… never to be invited to gatherings again.

Does this sound like you?

As easy as it may seem for some, not everyone is able to socialize and make friends. You’d think as we age, it may get easier, but for some it’s a real problem.  They just plain don’t know what to do or how to act around unfamiliar people.

For some, it might not even be about self-confidence.  They simply lack the knowledge in the practical steps they must take in order to feel comfortable in an unfamiliar setting.

Of course, there are those who are insecure.  Even the old motto, “Be yourself” doesn’t work for them because they simply lack sef-confidence.

I’ve had my own share of insecurities and the experience of feeling like an outcast.  When I was young, I was proud of being weird, and just plain clueless!

Still today, I may not be the most popular guy, but I’m pretty confident being who I am and I am fine in any social setting.

Here’s a little guide I came up with, in both practical ways to meeting people and bolstering up your confidence:

 

1. Know that you can’t please everyone in life

First all, it’s important to know that you can’t please everyone.

In fact, try to do so won’t help you much in any way.

Don’t lower your standards or ignore your values just to seem more personable or friendly.

In the end, it’s not worth it.

First, just relax and meet people and see if there’s chemistry. If there isn’t, move on.

2. Sometimes you just have to go with the flow

As diificult as this may seems for some…Maybe this is a somewhat counter-productive piece of advice, but sometimes, you just got to go with the flow of the group even if you disagree with something.

The reason  is that nobody likes a wet blanket. By disagreeing with something or wanting things your way, you may come across as selfish.

Everyone definitely has their own set of values and likes, but sometimes, to fit in, you got to let loose a little.

3. Don’t try too hard.

When you try too hard, people can tell.

When that happens, people will lose respect for you and probably start to find you annoying.

Again, this is where you relax and simply try to see if there’s chemistry with whoever you meet. If there isn’t, stop.

It’s okay. Go meet someone else. You guys don’t have to be the best of friends anyway.

4. Be willing to apologize

When you’re wrong, be a man and admit it.

Humble yourself, and apologize.

People will lose respect for you if you don’t do a thing about it all when you’re obviously in the wrong.

Not only would people respect you for trying to right a wrong, they would like you for your willingnss to show you’re flawed.

5. Above all else, it boils down to your manners

Something basic, yet surprisingly a lot of people lack.

It’s manners.

Have your “Please” and “Thank you” ready and you’d do fine.

It’s this foundation in meeting people that people can relate to and remember you for. And this is absolutely true in life.

Why? Because Nobody likes a rude person.

Just five little tips.

They can go all the way when applied correctly, for both your mind and your actions. In life, you definitely meet a lot of people, so you got to be flexible, but it’s these basics I feel would help in the long run.

Head over to Alden Tan, drop in your email address and I’ll send this course over to you.

-Find out how to gain the confidence to do what you love.

-Learn how to talk to others and be yourself.

-A comprehensive list of things you can tell yourself, to be yourself!

This email course is only available through this link to Alden-Tan. Thanks for giving it a chance!

Photo credit: ‘Friendship‘ by Big Stock

  • Katie

    I learnt the very first tip of accepting that I
    cannot please everyone around me and since then, things have been comparatively easy. Most of
    us try to remain calm and silent and ignore comments that provoke us to start
    an argument but forget that we are upsetting ourselves and lowering our self
    esteem in the process. Once we get into this habit of taking everything with a
    pinch of salt, we find it very difficult to change this overnight and it
    becomes the reason for out constant irritability and frustration. So, it’s
    better to realize who we are and speak our mind whenever the situation demands.
    http://www.prisqua.com/

    • http://www.facebook.com/Bboyalden Alden Tan

      Nicely said Katie. It’s something I could learn from myself. I tend to take a lot of things personally, hence making me angered by little things.

      Pinch of salt it is! 

  • http://www.shapedaily.com/best-walks-runs-and-marathons-that-benefit-breast-cancer-fundraising/ Christine@ShapeDaily

    This article was great!! I couldn’t stop reading. One key
    thing that you said was: Be willing to apologize. I remember a time when I did
    something that I shouldn’t have done to a friend and I apologized for what I
    did and there was also a time when he did something and he also apologized. We
    forgave each other and we moved on from that point. Today, one year later from
    forgiving one another we are still close as can be even with him being miles
    and miles away due to the military. That’s key….to be willing to admit your
    mistakes and move on. Had we not, who knows if we would have been able to keep
    such a strong bond where we are able to talk every other week.

    • http://www.facebook.com/Bboyalden Alden Tan

      Glad you liked it Christine!

      That’s awesome. The way I’ve seen it, when someone doesn’t own up to apologize, it just gives fuel for everyone else to be annoyed and start talking about him or her. 

  • Bogdi213

    The first tip has to be my favorite. And the do not try to hard!

    • http://www.facebook.com/Bboyalden Alden Tan

      Indeed. Why should we ever try too hard? It just comes off as annoying. 

  • http://changebasics.blogspot.in/ Jaky Astik

    I only know two rules of social awesomeness – Do something you love and be the best at doing it. People will like you for being the best. Not everyone is meant to like you, so get yourself an iPod and when that happens, plug them in and forget them off. 

    • http://www.facebook.com/Bboyalden Alden Tan

      Nicely said Jaky! The iPod bit was awesome! 

  • http://www.facebook.com/max.anderson.313 Don Anderson

    Hi,
    I just started my own blog, would be great if some of you guys could give me feedback!

    http://motivationselfdevelopment.blogspot.de/