“Happiness is a habit – cultivate it.” ~ Elbert Hubbard
Happiness is one aspiration all people share. No one wants to be sad and depressed.
We’ve all seen people who are always happy – even amidst agonizing life trials. I’m not saying happy people don’t feel grief, sorrow or sadness; they just don’t let it overtake their life. The following are 21 things happy people make a habit of doing:
1. Appreciate Life
Be thankful that you woke up alive each morning. Develop a childlike sense of wonder towards life. Focus on the beauty of every living thing. Make the most of each day. Don’t take anything for granted. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
2. Choose Friends Wisely
Surround yourself with happy, positive people who share your values and goals. Friends that have the same ethics as you will encourage you to achieve your dreams. They help you to feel good about yourself. They are there to lend a helping hand when needed.
3. Be Considerate
Accept others for who they are as well as where they are in life. Respect them for who they are. Touch them with a kind and generous spirit. Help when you are able, without trying to change the other person. Try to brighten the day of everyone you come into contact with.
4. Learn Continuously
Keep up to date with the latest news regarding your career and hobbies. Try new and daring things that has sparked your interest – such as dancing, skiing, surfing or sky-diving.
5. Creative Problem Solving
Don’t wallow in self-pity. As soon as you face a challenge get busy finding a solution. Don’t let the set backs affect your mood, instead see each new obstacle you face as an opportunity to make a positive change. Learn to trust your gut instincts – it’s almost always right.
6. Do What They Love
Some statistics show that 80% of people dislike their jobs! No wonder there’s so many unhappy people running around. We spend a great deal of our life working. Choose a career that you enjoy – the extra money of a job you detest isn’t worth it. Make time to enjoy your hobbies and pursue special interests.
7. Enjoy Life
Take the time to see the beauty around you. There’s more to life than work. Take time to smell the roses, watch a sunset or sunrise with a loved one, take a walk along the seashore, hike in the woods etc. Learn to live in the present moment and cherish it. Don’t live in the past or the future.
8. Laugh
Don’t take yourself – or life to seriously. You can find humor in just about any situation. Laugh at yourself – no one’s perfect. When appropriate laugh and make light of the circumstances. (Naturally there are times that you should be serious as it would be improper to laugh.)
9. Forgive
Holding a grudge will hurt no one but you. Forgive others for your own peace of mind. When you make a mistake – own up to it – learn from it – and FORGIVE yourself.
10. Gratitude
Develop an attitude of gratitude. Count your blessings; All of them – even the things that seem trivial. Be grateful for your home, your work and most importantly your family and friends. Take the time to tell them that you are happy they are in your life.
11. Invest in Relationships
Always make sure your loved ones know you love them even in times of conflict. Nurture and grow your relationships with your family and friends by making the time to spend with them. Don’t break your promises to them. Be supportive.
12. Keep Their Word
Honesty is the best policy. Every action and decision you make should be based on honesty. Be honest with yourself and with your loved ones.
13. Meditate
Meditation gives your very active brain a rest. When it’s rested you will have more energy and function at a higher level. Types of meditation include yoga, hypnosis, relaxation tapes, affirmations, visualization or just sitting in complete silence. Find something you enjoy and make the time to practice daily.
14. Mind Their Own Business
Concentrate on creating your life the way you want it. Take care of you and your family. Don’t get overly concerned with what other people are doing or saying. Don’t get caught up with gossip or name calling. Don’t judge. Everyone has a right to live their own life the way they want to – including you.
15. Optimism
See the glass as half full. Find the positive side of any given situation. It’s there – even though it may be hard to find. Know that everything happens for a reason, even though you may never know what the reason is. Steer clear of negative thoughts. If a negative thought creeps in – replace it with a positive thought.
16. Love Unconditionally
Accept others for who they are. You don’t put limitations on your love. Even though you may not always like the actions of your loved ones – you continue to love them.
17. Persistence
Never give up. Face each new challenge with the attitude that it will bring you one step closer to your goal. You will never fail, as long as you never give up. Focus on what you want, learn the required skills, make a plan to succeed and take action. We are always happiest while pursuing something of value to us.
18. Be Proactive
Accept what can not be changed. Happy people don’t waste energy on circumstances beyond their control. Accept your limitations as a human being. Determine how you can take control by creating the outcome you desire – rather than waiting to respond.
19. Self Care
Take care of your mind, body and health. Get regular medical check ups. Eat healthy and work out. Get plenty of rest. Drink lots of water. Exercise your mind by continually energizing it with interesting and exciting challenges.
20. Self Confidence
Don’t try to be someone that you’re not. After all no one likes a phony. Determine who you are in the inside – your own personal likes and dislikes. Be confident in who you are. Do the best you can and don’t second guess yourself.
21. Take Responsibility
Happy people know and understand that they are 100% responsible for their life. They take responsibility for their moods, attitude, thoughts, feelings, actions and words. They are the first to admit when they’ve made a mistake.
Begin today by taking responsibility for your happiness. Work on developing these habits as you own. The more you incorporate the above habits into your daily lifestyle – the happier you will be.
Most of all: BE TRUE TO YOURSELF.
Cindy Holbrook manages a blog that focuses on Overcoming Life’s Obstacles. She pulls from her personal experiences as well as through her 15+ years working in social services. Pick up your free e-book “Your Guide to Happiness” when you visit CindySense.com.
Images by Hamed Masoumi, A4gpa and ePi Longo.
Great post Cindy, hopefully I can try to develop as many of these habits as I can. Life is really wonderful, and I guess the best way to go through it is to be true to yourself and once in a while, to stop and smell the roses.
Great post indeed. Very invigorating to read through all of the things that make me happy in life. I love the pics as well.
http://yinvsyang.com/
Good, positive post. I agree with most of this except the bit about friends. How can we choose the friends who are there for us and make us feel best and avoid those who drain us? What is the effect on a workplace or small community when we all choose not to be friends with that one person who drains everyone? What is the effect on them? Quite frankly, depressed people are often no fun to be with and can be unsupportive when they are wrapped up in their own problems. I have a couple of friends who drain me at times. I could not abandon them. They are probably the friends who I mean most to.
Pol,
Thanks for the comment. I understand what you are saying. And I would never say to abandon your friends when they are having a hard time.
I’m saying it’s best to choose to not associate with negative people that bring you down. People who tell you you will never achieve your dreams, people that tell you that the things you enjoy are stupid .. etc
We can not always choose who we work with – but we can choose how often and when to associate with them. We don’t have to have breaks with them – or associate with them after work.
Your questions could really take up an entire post – I’ll have to get to work on that!
4,6,13
I’m a really happy guy, and these are the three most important for me. I need to be learning something new, consistently; doing what I love, especially in regard to how I make my living; and I have to have a little silence in each of my days.
Cindy,
Thanks for this article. It’s good to start the new week off on a happy and positive note
Fantastic post, Cindy! Love this list and will refer to it often. I’d like to share my own that was a guest post at Dumb Little Man called “25 Statements to Happiness.” These 25 statements gave me the clues to what it was I was missing in my life (how I thought about things) at a time when I was abjectly unhappy. Here’s the link: http://www.dumblittleman.com/2008/04/25-statements-to-happiness.html
Wonderful observations. I think being proactive is the most important one – happy people realize that happiness is a choice.
[...] 最重要的是：做真实的自己。 Most of all: BE TRUE TO YOURSELF. 原文：21 Habits of Happy People – pickthebrain.com 译者：阿星（Morning [...]
I am happy, I look at the list and think okay, here are a few more things I can do to keep the mojo running.
Thanks for the list,
-Tabs
I have found that people who would say they are “happy” are not in a temporary “state of being” but in a perpetual “trait of being,” which is called contentment.
This is an inspirational list and I will not take away from it; however, I have observed that people who are content do not need external inspiration, such as a list of ways to be happy, to be “happy.”
Thanks for all your comments!
Gabriel – I agree the best philosophy is to be true to yourself.
Pete – Glad you enjoyed the article.
Pol – I agree with you, and your comments could actually lead to a whole new post! (Better get busy writing it. )
I agree that depressed people aren’t fun to be with. I had a pretty bad bout of depression in the early 90s and just wrote an article about Overcoming Depression on CindySense. It is important for you to be there for them – but you also need to take care of yourself, and don’t let them bring you down with them. We all go through times in our life where we are so overwhelmed that we do drain those that we are closed to.
I’m talking about choosing not to spend time with people who demean your dreams and goals; People who are constantly negative and in general like to bring everyone down around them. People who never give you anything – but demand everything in return. If you work with a person like this, you don’t’ need to have breaks with them – or go out of your way to spend time with them. Why would you want to?
Writer Dad – I love learning too! Thanks for the feedback.
Peter – We should begin every day and every week on a positive note
Shanel – Thanks for sharing that link!
Michael – Being proactive gives us the edge on what goes on in our life.
Tabs – There’s always thing we can do to keep the mojo running
Financial Philosopher – Thanks for your viewpoint. I agree with you. Unfortunately not too many people ever actually achieve the contentment you are speaking about.
Excellent list of tools for a more joyous life, Cindy. Thank you.
Would you mind if I reference your article in my upcoming “Celebrate What’s Right”carnival
http://kathmandau.blogspot.com/2008/08/call-for-submissions-celebration.html ? This is just the type of positive perspective that I am trying to put together.
Many blessings to you and your dear ones,
CG
I especially liked point 14. Mind their own business and 21. Take Responsibility. So very many people lack the maturity to take responsibility for themselves. The conclusion of psychological studies is that many of us do not progress developmentally beyond the age of 11. Those who can’t take responsibility for themselves are still blaming everything on their big sister to try to get out of trouble.
Good article.
GG – I’m glad you enjoyed the post. I have no problem with you refrencing my article. You may want to subscribe to my newsletter on CindySense to get my Free e-book “your Guide to Happiness”. It adds to this article.
Stephen – So true, if people would mind their own business and take responsibility for them selves, the world would be a brighter place. And hey “What’s wrong with blaming my BIG sister – I like blaming her.”
– Just kidding, my big sister has really taught me a lot about life!
Tip#21 is the best!! Once we decide to take responsibility for our own lives, we start to do things that will influence how we feel each day rather than blaming everything and everyone else!
“Happiness is not achieved by the conscious pursuit of happiness; it is generally the by-product of other activities.” – Aldous Huxley
Nice quick read, Cindy – and a good reminder as to why I feel I have a happy life. I practice all of those – and when I’m not happy, something’s slipped.
Great post. These types of articles make me happy to be alive. Thanks a lot!
I would say that probably if you manage to do what you love (6), that is the biggest step towards a life of happiness and fulfilment – it just makes it easier for all the rest to fall into place.
Thank you Cindy, a very nice post.
[...] 21 habits of happy people [...]
Just wanted to say thanks for putting this list together, definitely grateful that i stumbled upon it and cant wait to start putting it into practice.
cheers!! keep up the good work!
Really great job with this – would have taken me years to try & narrow it down and you’ve done a wonderful job.
I think one other item to add to the list is humility.
[...] 21 Habits of Happy People [nw] :: Pick The Brain – while many of these suggestions would seem to be pretty common sense it is good to remind oneself of them once in awhile. [...]
These are all great habits to have. My favorite is #7 and living life in the moment. I recently came across a really cool book called The Pink Forest. In it Dana Dorfman expounds on her concept of momentology and how living in the moment and being aware of those moments really does make life fuller and more meaningful.
Given things are ok but happy comes from inside, outside circumtences hardly matters, just we have to think about positive in each thing. There may be many other habits which make us happy or the less than that above specified habit can also keep us happy. Don’t do bad or over things, be optimum in the things. Search the way in which you will be happy at present.
Someone on twitter linked to this article and I read it with growing delight! I have an 18 year old son about to go to University later this month and I have been musing over what I could/should say to him (I know! I should have done that a LONG time ago! I have, to some extent, but this is a major moment for him and his parents so it felt like it needed something extra). I couldn’t have put it better so I just sent the link to him and hope we get a chance to discuss it! Thanks.
waw
what a an article
i’m really amazed..
i’m gonna do the things and i’m sure i’ll be one of the happiest people
[...] 21 Habits Of Happy People [...]
Thats all true and good however, conditions can change and unhappiness sets in, like you may know what you want and that would make you have a happy life, but you can’t get the money to get in that position that would allow you to have the time to be happy. See some of us have to work and work long hours to make enough money for the basic in live, but life changes and the basic get boring and being bored without money. I know I could be happier than I am if I had the funs to bring me to that position. Happiness is a when a person can do what makes that person happy or group.
[...] José Calleja Esnal, Martes 7 de Octubre, 2008; 1:09 am Cindy Holbrook publica en su blog 21 hábitos de la gente feliz, vale la pena darse una vuelta por ahí Sin comentarios Publicado bajo: Mini-Posts, Sociedad [...]
[...] ¿Quieres ser feliz? Descubre las 21 cosas que suelen hacer las personas felices [...]
[...] daqui. Imagem: Cico. Nenhum Comentário até o momento Deixe um comentário Feed RSS dos [...]
[...] Holbrook presents 21 Habits of Happy People at PickTheBrain. We’ve all seen people who are always happy – even amidst agonizing life [...]
[...] hat auf “Pick The Brain” 21 Gewohnheiten glücklicher Menschen identifiziert: “21 Habits of Happy People“. Ihr geht es nicht um konkrete Handlungen, sondern eher um die Einstellung glücklicher [...]
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#8 should be “too seriously” not “to seriously”.
Oh I’m sooo negative!
Great post! A great compilation of the kind of attitude one must keep in order to lead a truly happy and blissful life. Happiness in all situations and the art of living is not something that one inherits from birth, but one has to learn and develop these qualities in his/her lifetime.
thnx
What a wonderful post. Happiness is definitely a choice that we make through our own approach to this beautiful thing called life.