21 Habits of Happy People

Written by Cindy Holbrook - 103 Comments
Categories: self improvement

happy people

“Happiness is a habit – cultivate it.” ~ Elbert Hubbard

Happiness is one aspiration all people share. No one wants to be sad and depressed.

We’ve all seen people who are always happy – even amidst agonizing life trials. I’m not saying happy people don’t feel grief, sorrow or sadness; they just don’t let it overtake their life. The following are 21 things happy people make a habit of doing:

1. Appreciate Life

Be thankful that you woke up alive each morning. Develop a childlike sense of wonder towards life. Focus on the beauty of every living thing. Make the most of each day. Don’t take anything for granted. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

2. Choose Friends Wisely

Surround yourself with happy, positive people who share your values and goals. Friends that have the same ethics as you will encourage you to achieve your dreams. They help you to feel good about yourself. They are there to lend a helping hand when needed.

3. Be Considerate

Accept others for who they are as well as where they are in life. Respect them for who they are. Touch them with a kind and generous spirit. Help when you are able, without trying to change the other person. Try to brighten the day of everyone you come into contact with.

4. Learn Continuously

Keep up to date with the latest news regarding your career and hobbies. Try new and daring things that has sparked your interest – such as dancing, skiing, surfing or sky-diving.

5. Creative Problem Solving

Don’t wallow in self-pity. As soon as you face a challenge get busy finding a solution. Don’t let the set backs affect your mood, instead see each new obstacle you face as an opportunity to make a positive change. Learn to trust your gut instincts – it’s almost always right.

6. Do What They Love

Some statistics show that 80% of people dislike their jobs! No wonder there’s so many unhappy people running around. We spend a great deal of our life working. Choose a career that you enjoy – the extra money of a job you detest isn’t worth it. Make time to enjoy your hobbies and pursue special interests.

7. Enjoy Life

Take the time to see the beauty around you. There’s more to life than work. Take time to smell the roses, watch a sunset or sunrise with a loved one, take a walk along the seashore, hike in the woods etc. Learn to live in the present moment and cherish it. Don’t live in the past or the future.

laugh.jpg

8. Laugh

Don’t take yourself – or life to seriously. You can find humor in just about any situation. Laugh at yourself – no one’s perfect. When appropriate laugh and make light of the circumstances. (Naturally there are times that you should be serious as it would be improper to laugh.)

9. Forgive

Holding a grudge will hurt no one but you. Forgive others for your own peace of mind. When you make a mistake – own up to it – learn from it – and FORGIVE yourself.

10. Gratitude

Develop an attitude of gratitude. Count your blessings; All of them – even the things that seem trivial. Be grateful for your home, your work and most importantly your family and friends. Take the time to tell them that you are happy they are in your life.

11. Invest in Relationships

Always make sure your loved ones know you love them even in times of conflict. Nurture and grow your relationships with your family and friends by making the time to spend with them. Don’t break your promises to them. Be supportive.

12. Keep Their Word

Honesty is the best policy. Every action and decision you make should be based on honesty. Be honest with yourself and with your loved ones.

bliss.jpg

13. Meditate

Meditation gives your very active brain a rest. When it’s rested you will have more energy and function at a higher level. Types of meditation include yoga, hypnosis, relaxation tapes, affirmations, visualization or just sitting in complete silence. Find something you enjoy and make the time to practice daily.

14. Mind Their Own Business

Concentrate on creating your life the way you want it. Take care of you and your family. Don’t get overly concerned with what other people are doing or saying. Don’t get caught up with gossip or name calling. Don’t judge. Everyone has a right to live their own life the way they want to – including you.

15. Optimism

See the glass as half full. Find the positive side of any given situation. It’s there – even though it may be hard to find. Know that everything happens for a reason, even though you may never know what the reason is. Steer clear of negative thoughts. If a negative thought creeps in – replace it with a positive thought.

16. Love Unconditionally

Accept others for who they are. You don’t put limitations on your love. Even though you may not always like the actions of your loved ones – you continue to love them.

17. Persistence

Never give up. Face each new challenge with the attitude that it will bring you one step closer to your goal. You will never fail, as long as you never give up. Focus on what you want, learn the required skills, make a plan to succeed and take action. We are always happiest while pursuing something of value to us.

18. Be Proactive

Accept what can not be changed. Happy people don’t waste energy on circumstances beyond their control. Accept your limitations as a human being. Determine how you can take control by creating the outcome you desire – rather than waiting to respond.

19. Self Care

Take care of your mind, body and health. Get regular medical check ups. Eat healthy and work out. Get plenty of rest. Drink lots of water. Exercise your mind by continually energizing it with interesting and exciting challenges.

20. Self Confidence

Don’t try to be someone that you’re not. After all no one likes a phony. Determine who you are in the inside – your own personal likes and dislikes. Be confident in who you are. Do the best you can and don’t second guess yourself.

21. Take Responsibility

Happy people know and understand that they are 100% responsible for their life. They take responsibility for their moods, attitude, thoughts, feelings, actions and words. They are the first to admit when they’ve made a mistake.

Begin today by taking responsibility for your happiness. Work on developing these habits as you own. The more you incorporate the above habits into your daily lifestyle – the happier you will be.

Most of all: BE TRUE TO YOURSELF.

Cindy Holbrook manages a blog that focuses on Overcoming Life’s Obstacles. She pulls from her personal experiences as well as through her 15+ years working in social services. Pick up your free e-book “Your Guide to Happiness” when you visit CindySense.com.

Images by Hamed Masoumi, A4gpa and ePi Longo.

  • Gabriel

    Great post Cindy, hopefully I can try to develop as many of these habits as I can. Life is really wonderful, and I guess the best way to go through it is to be true to yourself and once in a while, to stop and smell the roses.

  • http://www.yinvsyang.com Pete

    Great post indeed. Very invigorating to read through all of the things that make me happy in life. I love the pics as well.

    http://yinvsyang.com/

  • Pol

    Good, positive post. I agree with most of this except the bit about friends. How can we choose the friends who are there for us and make us feel best and avoid those who drain us? What is the effect on a workplace or small community when we all choose not to be friends with that one person who drains everyone? What is the effect on them? Quite frankly, depressed people are often no fun to be with and can be unsupportive when they are wrapped up in their own problems. I have a couple of friends who drain me at times. I could not abandon them. They are probably the friends who I mean most to.

  • http://writerdad.com Writer Dad

    4,6,13

    I’m a really happy guy, and these are the three most important for me. I need to be learning something new, consistently; doing what I love, especially in regard to how I make my living; and I have to have a little silence in each of my days.

  • http://www.pickthebrain.com Peter

    Cindy,

    Thanks for this article. It’s good to start the new week off on a happy and positive note :)

  • http://shanelyang.com/blogs/articles/ Shanel Yang

    Fantastic post, Cindy! Love this list and will refer to it often. I’d like to share my own that was a guest post at Dumb Little Man called “25 Statements to Happiness.” These 25 statements gave me the clues to what it was I was missing in my life (how I thought about things) at a time when I was abjectly unhappy. Here’s the link: http://www.dumblittleman.com/2008/04/25-statements-to-happiness.html

  • http://effortlessabundance.com Michael Miles

    Wonderful observations. I think being proactive is the most important one – happy people realize that happiness is a choice.

  • http://www.cindysense.com Overcoming Lifes Obstacles

    Pol,

    Thanks for the comment. I understand what you are saying. And I would never say to abandon your friends when they are having a hard time.

    I’m saying it’s best to choose to not associate with negative people that bring you down. People who tell you you will never achieve your dreams, people that tell you that the things you enjoy are stupid .. etc

    We can not always choose who we work with – but we can choose how often and when to associate with them. We don’t have to have breaks with them – or associate with them after work.

    Your questions could really take up an entire post – I’ll have to get to work on that!

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  • http://www.levnow.com/blog Tabs

    I am happy, I look at the list and think okay, here are a few more things I can do to keep the mojo running.

    Thanks for the list,

    -Tabs

  • http://financialphilosopher.typepad.com/thefinancialphilosopher/ The Financial Philosopher

    I have found that people who would say they are “happy” are not in a temporary “state of being” but in a perpetual “trait of being,” which is called contentment.

    This is an inspirational list and I will not take away from it; however, I have observed that people who are content do not need external inspiration, such as a list of ways to be happy, to be “happy.”

  • http://www.cindysense.com Overcoming Lifes Obstacles

    Thanks for all your comments!

    Gabriel – I agree the best philosophy is to be true to yourself.

    Pete – Glad you enjoyed the article.

    Pol – I agree with you, and your comments could actually lead to a whole new post! (Better get busy writing it. )

    I agree that depressed people aren’t fun to be with. I had a pretty bad bout of depression in the early 90s and just wrote an article about Overcoming Depression on CindySense. It is important for you to be there for them – but you also need to take care of yourself, and don’t let them bring you down with them. We all go through times in our life where we are so overwhelmed that we do drain those that we are closed to.

    I’m talking about choosing not to spend time with people who demean your dreams and goals; People who are constantly negative and in general like to bring everyone down around them. People who never give you anything – but demand everything in return. If you work with a person like this, you don’t’ need to have breaks with them – or go out of your way to spend time with them. Why would you want to?

    Writer Dad – I love learning too! Thanks for the feedback.

    Peter – We should begin every day and every week on a positive note 

    Shanel – Thanks for sharing that link!

    Michael – Being proactive gives us the edge on what goes on in our life.

    Tabs – There’s always thing we can do to keep the mojo running 

    Financial Philosopher – Thanks for your viewpoint. I agree with you. Unfortunately not too many people ever actually achieve the contentment you are speaking about.

  • http://www.kathmandau.blogspot.com/ CG Walters

    Excellent list of tools for a more joyous life, Cindy. Thank you.
    Would you mind if I reference your article in my upcoming “Celebrate What’s Right”carnival
    http://kathmandau.blogspot.com/2008/08/call-for-submissions-celebration.html ? This is just the type of positive perspective that I am trying to put together.

    Many blessings to you and your dear ones,
    CG

  • http://www.balancedexistence.com Stephen

    I especially liked point 14. Mind their own business and 21. Take Responsibility. So very many people lack the maturity to take responsibility for themselves. The conclusion of psychological studies is that many of us do not progress developmentally beyond the age of 11. Those who can’t take responsibility for themselves are still blaming everything on their big sister to try to get out of trouble.

    Good article.

  • http://www.cindysense.com Overcoming Lifes Obstacles

    GG – I’m glad you enjoyed the post. I have no problem with you refrencing my article. You may want to subscribe to my newsletter on CindySense to get my Free e-book “your Guide to Happiness”. It adds to this article.

    Stephen – So true, if people would mind their own business and take responsibility for them selves, the world would be a brighter place. And hey “What’s wrong with blaming my BIG sister – I like blaming her.” :-) – Just kidding, my big sister has really taught me a lot about life!

  • http://www.attractionmindmap.com Evelyn Lim

    Tip#21 is the best!! Once we decide to take responsibility for our own lives, we start to do things that will influence how we feel each day rather than blaming everything and everyone else!

  • http://www.varsityblah.com/about Eugene (Editor, Varsity Blah)

    “Happiness is not achieved by the conscious pursuit of happiness; it is generally the by-product of other activities.” – Aldous Huxley

  • http://www.somedaysyndrome.com Alex Fayle

    Nice quick read, Cindy – and a good reminder as to why I feel I have a happy life. I practice all of those – and when I’m not happy, something’s slipped.

  • http://www.zencollegelife.com Ibrahim | ZenCollegeLife.com

    Great post. These types of articles make me happy to be alive. Thanks a lot!

  • http://withopenheart.blogspot.com Open Heart

    I would say that probably if you manage to do what you love (6), that is the biggest step towards a life of happiness and fulfilment – it just makes it easier for all the rest to fall into place.

    Thank you Cindy, a very nice post.

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  • Gracielou

    Just wanted to say thanks for putting this list together, definitely grateful that i stumbled upon it and cant wait to start putting it into practice.

    cheers!! keep up the good work!

  • http://www.wedocreative.com Zee from WeDoCreative

    Really great job with this – would have taken me years to try & narrow it down and you’ve done a wonderful job.

  • http://jonthansblog.wordpress.com/ EL Numero Juan

    I think one other item to add to the list is humility.

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  • http://www.danadorfman.com/ Ruth

    These are all great habits to have. My favorite is #7 and living life in the moment. I recently came across a really cool book called The Pink Forest. In it Dana Dorfman expounds on her concept of momentology and how living in the moment and being aware of those moments really does make life fuller and more meaningful.

  • RaAr

    Given things are ok but happy comes from inside, outside circumtences hardly matters, just we have to think about positive in each thing. There may be many other habits which make us happy or the less than that above specified habit can also keep us happy. Don’t do bad or over things, be optimum in the things. Search the way in which you will be happy at present.

  • http://banjax.com darrylxxx

    Someone on twitter linked to this article and I read it with growing delight! I have an 18 year old son about to go to University later this month and I have been musing over what I could/should say to him (I know! I should have done that a LONG time ago! I have, to some extent, but this is a major moment for him and his parents so it felt like it needed something extra). I couldn’t have put it better so I just sent the link to him and hope we get a chance to discuss it! Thanks.

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    waw
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    i’m really amazed..
    i’m gonna do the things and i’m sure i’ll be one of the happiest people

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  • Johnny

    Thats all true and good however, conditions can change and unhappiness sets in, like you may know what you want and that would make you have a happy life, but you can’t get the money to get in that position that would allow you to have the time to be happy. See some of us have to work and work long hours to make enough money for the basic in live, but life changes and the basic get boring and being bored without money. I know I could be happier than I am if I had the funs to bring me to that position. Happiness is a when a person can do what makes that person happy or group.

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  • Fred

    #8 should be “too seriously” not “to seriously”.
    Oh I’m sooo negative!

  • http://www.meditation-techniques-guide.com Vijay Kumar Raisinghani

    Great post! A great compilation of the kind of attitude one must keep in order to lead a truly happy and blissful life. Happiness in all situations and the art of living is not something that one inherits from birth, but one has to learn and develop these qualities in his/her lifetime.

  • http://pickthebrain.com aka

    thnx

  • http://blog.self-improvement-saga.com Nea | Self Improvement Saga

    What a wonderful post. Happiness is definitely a choice that we make through our own approach to this beautiful thing called life.

  • Halle Bose

    What a great list!
    It’s true that happiness so often isn’t dependent on what we think it is.
    http://trifter.com/caribbean-latin-america/costa-rica/what-makes-a-country-happy/
    Happiness, is a skill that parents should teach their kids. Each person has to ensure their own happiness.

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    Great Message and Great List… everyone should read the 21 Habits everyday!

    I will be Tweeting this message to my Followers!

    Tweet you later!

    @SeekingMinds

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  • http://www.seetheperfection.com seetheperfection

    Great words to motivate, uplift and absorb.

    May I post the full 21 on my site please with full credit to yourself?

    Thanks,

    Bhav

  • http://smartalx.blogspot.com Alex

    Pretty self-centered approach, especially regarding #21. What about everyone else??? We live in a cooperative society. Everyone affects everyone else. So quite often you have little control over what happens to you.

    This advice is far too new-agey for me.

  • lol

    oh well this is so easy, all you have to do to be “happy” is not have any flaws. why didn’t i think of this before. thanks, whatever idiot wrote this article.

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  • http://www.personal-development-is-fun.com Meghashyam Chirravoori

    Gratitude, unconditional love and appreciation were the three things that touched me the most.

    If we can fill our lives with these 3 alone, I think life would automatically start becoming so so happy.

    Thank yo so much for sharing – because in reading these habits – I have in some way re-enforced and watered the seeds of these habits already present in me.

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  • caliope

    you forgot narcissism.

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  • Olga

    I’m happy and every person can be happy when want! Be happy this big work every day, but this happy work:) Every person be happy, we live one time and have one happy:)

  • http://www.lifelonghappiness.com Ricky Powell

    I completely agree… lots of good tips here. Happiness is not just a habit, but a skill that always needs to be worked on and improved! We all have the ability to make the choice of happiness everyday! :)

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    How to be happy and inspired at work : http://www.taskwise.com/blog/2011/3/sources-of-inspiration

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    Great Article, I like to always start my day with an inspriational quote. Sometimes I go to http://www.markamoment.com to look at their daily saying so that I can think positively at the beginning of my day and week.

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    Delicious post! Thanks for the reminder!

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  • kathy

    Regarding #8: “Don’t take life too seriously–nobody gets out alive anyways”

  • http://twitter.com/Timesharepals J.W.White

    How True!

  • http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/how-to-change-your-thinking-by-using-self-affirmations/ How to Change Your Thinking by Using Self-Affirmations | PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement

    [...] The 21 Habits of Healthy People [...]

  • http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/6-reasons-why-you-should-love-stretching-your-comfort-zone/ 6 Reasons Why You Should Love Stretching Your Comfort Zone | PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement

    [...] [...]

  • http://trixialikesyou.wordpress.com/2011/10/11/21-habits-of-happy-people/ 21 Habits of Happy People « Pocket Full of Sunshine and Rainfall and Rainbows

    [...] Contributed by Cindy Holbrook [...]

  • http://www.combatjiujitsu.co.za/2011/10/21-habits-of-happy-people/ 21 Habits of Happy People | CJA: Combat Jiu-Jitsu Academy

    [...] READ THE REST OF THE ARTICLE HERE [...]

  • http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/how-to-stay-motivated-on-big-projects/ How to Stay Motivated on Big Projects | PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement

    [...] The 21 Habits of Healthy People [...]

  • http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/11-simple-ways-to-become-confident-like-a-rap-star/ 11 Simple Ways to Become Confident Like a Rap Star | PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement

    [...] The 21 Habits of Healthy People [...]

  • http://thenetworkgoddess.com/?p=373 Habits of Happy Networkers | The Network Goddess

    [...] positive, so I want to share some advice from Pick Your Brain blogger Cindy Holbrook, who wrote “The 21 Habits of Happy People” – except here, I’ll be translating her list into one that is appropriate for [...]

  • BenC

    Got an assignment on this for English freshman year today thanks alot ……  .___.

  • http://descargar-ares.org/ Juan | descargar ares

    very good blog and very good article will help me thank you for all greetings

  • Anonymous

    Wonderful post. Thanks! I’ll add a few to my growing list of highly effective habits of happy peeps :)

    Fiona @ http://www.BetterEdit.com

  • http://www.pearltrees.com/pj123/interesting/id3830805 Interesting by pj123 – Pearltrees

    [...] Eat healthy and work out. Get plenty of rest. Drink lots of water. Exercise your mind by continually energizing it with interesting and exciting challenges. 21 Habits of Happy People | PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement [...]

  • http://thenetworkgoddess.com/?p=535 Habits of Happy Networkers | The Network Goddess

    [...] own advice with number 7. And now to start our next seven tips, adapted from Cindy Holbrook’s “The 21 Habits of Happy People.” "Laugh" – My cousin, Keith Becker, (center) sharing a laugh with FBI agent Chadwick [...]

  • http://www.cairynorido.com/blog/work-life-balance-5-ways-on-how-i-do-it/ Work-Life Balance, 5 Ways on How I Do It | Cairyn Orido

    [...] plays a great role in a person’s productivity and self-motivation. If they’re very happy with their lives, are highly motivated with their work and very productive with it, it wouldn’t be weird for [...]

  • http://thenetworkgoddess.com/?p=539 Happy Networking | The Network Goddess

    [...] Many thanks to Cindy Holbrook for blogging about the 21 Habits of Happy People. [...]