8 Moves to Make When You Want to Give Up

Written by Editor in Chief, Pick The Brain - 43 Comments
Categories: motivation

Hand holding cardsTaking the easy road is nice for a while, but for talented, motivated people it isn’t enough. To find satisfaction you’ll need to set ambitious goals, solve challenging problems, and develop strengths you may not know you have.

Although the hard road is more fulfilling, it isn’t all champagne and victory laps. There will be times when you feel beaten and depressed — times when quitting looks like the best option. There is no formula for dealing with hard times, but these 8 steps will help you understand your predicament and determine the best course of action.

1. Take a Break

One reason we get down ourselves is fatigue. When you’re tired everything is harder. Working your tail off for extended periods will wear you down if you aren’t careful. You’ll also get bored. Fatigue and boredom combine to cause burnout — one of the biggest reasons people quit. When faced with burnout, the best thing to do is take a break. Cut yourself off completely. Do absolutely nothing for a day or two. What’s the worst that could happen? By allowing yourself to recover you’ll be more productive in the long run.

2. Step Back

Sometimes we get so absorbed in our own sphere that we develop a distorted picture of reality. When you feel like giving up, there’s a good chance that a) things aren’t nearly as bad as they seem, and b) there’s a simple solution that you’re overlooking. When things seem bleak, distance yourself from the situation to gain an accurate perspective. What would someone without any emotional involvement do? Asking this question will help you make optimal decisions.

3. Do Your Research

The only constant in the universe is change, but when you’re plugging away with your head down it’s easy not to notice. People often make decisions based on outdated assumptions made months, or even years earlier. To develop a course of action, you’ll need to know where you stand. Stop to evaluate your position.

  • What do you have?
  • What do you want?
  • How has the market adjusted?
  • What opportunities still exist?
  • What new opportunities have arisen?

By taking stock of the current situation, you’ll discover if your urge to quit is a passing whim or the correct decision.

4. Consult an Expert

When your knowledge base is insufficient you should seek an expert opinion. This doesn’t mean you have to make contact with a world class expert, anyone who knows more than you will be able to help. Think of friends, family, and business associates. Have any of them been in your position before? The web can also be a great resource, just be careful who you trust. Check out relevant forums or email a reputable blogger. I’m consistently impressed with the effort people expend to help total strangers.

5. Re-evaluate Your Strategy

Once you’re well informed, apply that knowledge to revamping your strategy. If you feel like giving up, you might be doing something wrong. This is the time to pour over your efforts and determine what works.

  • What actions have lead to the greatest benefit?
  • What mistakes have been made?
  • What can be improved?

By answering these questions you’ll fine tune your strategy. The urge to give up is a blessing when it leads to analysis and constructive adjustments.

6. Change Course

Knowing what’s wrong and how you can fix it is a relief. Unlike an invisible monster hovering over you, an exposed problem can be directly assaulted. Once you’ve determined a change needs to be made, implement it full force. Don’t hesitate or dwell on past mistakes. Trust your own judgment and deal with new issues as they arise.

7. Push Through the Dip

In some cases you might feel like giving up even though you’re doing all the right things. This is called “the dip” — the plateau that separates the average from the best in the world. Knowing what to do when you hit the dip is so important, Seth Godin wrote a book on it. In you’ve hit the dip and you can honestly say that going forward is the best decision, lower your shoulder and plow ahead until you reach the other side. It might not be pleasant but the rewards are tremendous. If you make it.

8. Quit

We don’t have thoughts and emotions for nothing. Sometimes quitting is the best decision. Maybe you didn’t know what you were getting into. Maybe your priorities have changed. Maybe you’d be better doing something else. If you know deep down that quitting is the right move, do it. Don’t hesitate because of previously invested effort. That’s a sunk cost. If you ignore your better judgment and continue you’ll waste more time and energy.

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  • http://garmahis.com Michael Garmahis

    I printed this great tips and will have a look at them every time I meet with difficulties. Thank you!

  • http://www.newstasis.com Patrick

    I like your article and I don’t think the importance of tip 8 can be overstated. Each experience changes and move us further away from the person we were when we made the decision to commit to something. The fantastic new job in a different city may lose its shine after a few months when we get good at it and it offers us little in the way of satisfaction and fulfillment. If you’ve taken the time to consider your options (the first 7 steps) and still feel or know that it’s wrong for you, you quit and free up your future.

  • http://www.shinewithgrace.com Shine With Grace

    Can’t agree more, esp. on pt. 1. Sometimes we just push ourselves too hard and the time we release us from the task, to take a shower, to fetch a cup of tea, the energy’s back and inspiration is floating again.

  • http://www.mattmccormick.ca Matt

    In addition to “The Dip” which I haven’t read I would recommend “Mastery” by George Leonard. He points out that one should enjoy the plateau and that it is a natural occurence of life. There is no avoiding it.

  • http://www.pickthebrain.com John Wesley

    That’s interesting, Matt. I’ve never thought of the plateau as something to look forward too!

  • http://www.potterzot.com/blog Own Your Own Decisions

    I’d say that the first two of these are my biggest problem. I tend to dive in a work maniacally, and then burn out and quit or have to walk away for a long time. It’s good for me to remember to take breaks.

    Thanks

  • http://www.pseudopower.com Carl of PseudoPower

    Love the post. I’m currently starting out as an entrepreneur. It started out all relaxed and easy, but it getting tougher. It’s not that I don’t like working, but it can be a drain on your body.

    I’m fascinated by the “Dip”. I’ll check Seth’s book out as well as Matt’s recommendation of “Mastery”.

    :)

  • http://www.onlinecashwithharveen.com Harveen

    #7 is the one im interested in, so I have to look into the book. It seems the ‘dip” is where I get stuck.

  • http://www.modern-worker.com Modern Worker

    Stepping back, definitely the most important

  • http://1000milejourney.com Xin

    Interesting post. I agree with some of the points, though others seem not as important to me.

    I am starting out as an Internet Entrepreneur. Spent 7 months in China hustling it out. Create http://www.findtoddlergroups.co.uk and a PPC tool using Ruby on Rails. All this has tired me out, combined with no real income as of yet, I’m feeling down.

    Reading you post has lifted my mood. I always knew I am this close to achieving it. All the noise and negative vibe from friends & family has affected me more than it should have. I should push ahead and get over the dip, to ripe my tremendous financial reward.

    I have also realised I need to keep up with positive habits. Jogging, meditation, reflection. Combine with this some instance of a social life, I’ll have what I need to plough ahead.

    I feel passionate about all this. I will blog it later on today.

  • tom bar

    If you’re ever in a situation where quiting looks to be your best option don’t follow any of these guidelines except the last one — quit.

    Anything else is you failing yourself.

    If you’re smart you’ll step into another position picked up before quiting elsewhere.

    Here’s the biggest secret nobody ever really slapped you in the face with enough times for you to really come to grips with it — DO NOT ACCUMULATE DEBT! It’s the greatest secret to happiness because it keeps your options always open. You’ll never be dependent on a miserable job to meet your financial obligations because your obligations can be met for a fraction of your current salary.

  • http://www.healthbolt.net Sara

    Great post, John! What has helped me at times is to remember that we need time to process (a fun way of saying “chill and do nothing!”) – all input and output for too long a stretch is depleting. Saw that on a great positivity blog a while back but don’t remember whose – or maybe it was a thread here! ;)

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  • http://redirect.alexa.com/redirect?davedragon.rilysi.com Dave Dragon

    tom bar said: “Here’s the biggest secret nobody ever really slapped you in the face with enough times for you to really come to grips with it — DO NOT ACCUMULATE DEBT! It’s the greatest secret to happiness because it keeps your options always open. You’ll never be dependent on a miserable job to meet your financial obligations because your obligations can be met for a fraction of your current salary.”

    I couldn’t agree more with these statements!
    Debt removes options at the time when you really need them.

    -Dave Dragon
    [url=http://davedragon.rilysi.com]Ride it like you stole it[/url]

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  • Dhananjay

    Very useful tips and I am so happy to find these at a right time. Though I am not intending to quit but still I would like to learn the art of handling the depression and build the power of sub concious mind to overcome on stressful situations.
    THank you very much.

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  • ragy mansour

    this will help me so much,i think u must be tired 2 know this grat parts of human body

  • Drew

    I get tired easily which is caused by my lack of respect for my body. I sleep late and enjoy too much internet. I feel like I am stealing from myself, if that’s even possible.

  • Drew

    Thanks.

  • Charmo

    interesting concept tombar, as i have let the finances slip i am contemplating getting back to an office job (which i dont particularly like) to get on top of things. Best advice: dont let the finances slip.

    Unless i get my big break soon looks like i will be going down this avenue :(

  • http://www.alternative-spiritual-healing.com ryan

    Great tips never giving up is one of the best tips around. That is why it is one of the best tips of the best free e-book “23 Steps to Spiritual Health.”

    You can download more tips for free here…

    http://www.alternative-spiritual-healing.com/free-self-help-ebooks.html

  • me

    I like the quiting thing it gives me permission to commit suicide

  • Brent

    :-) I gave up reading this half way through :-) Just teasing. Good suggestions.

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  • Danielle

    Great article,

    I found all of these to be helpful and found they help put a lot into
    perspective for me. I hope that others find them as helpful, I know I did!

  • Nancygiver

    Thanks for clearing my brain.  It’s just hard when you’re doing all the right things and stuff gets in your way – it feels to me that the  laws of nature are not on my side.  I guess it’s just emotional…

  • Vaggelispal

    bullshits

  • Ag5

    Thank you so much for this I have been really depressed lately because I lost my job.  I ‘ve been dealing with so many issues and I didn’t know what to do.  thank you so much.

  • Ag5

    Thank you so much for this I have been really depressed lately because I lost my job.  I ‘ve been dealing with so many issues and I didn’t know what to do.  thank you so much.

  • Jimmy Yorke

    Great post. i love it.

  • Jimmy Yorke

    Great post. i love it.

  • Jazz

    Great post!

  • http://www.simplycanvasart.co.uk/ canvas art prints

    I give up!

  • ihearttyson

    can you quit on life?

  • http://Worldstarhiphop.com/ Mariah keel

    Yes, and many people has…