{"id":7002,"date":"2011-07-28T00:54:11","date_gmt":"2011-07-28T08:54:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/?p=7002"},"modified":"2013-09-12T07:45:56","modified_gmt":"2013-09-12T15:45:56","slug":"why-you-should-never-attach-your-identity-to-what-you-do","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/why-you-should-never-attach-your-identity-to-what-you-do\/","title":{"rendered":"Why You Should Never Attach Your Identity To What You Do"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>

<\/a><\/p>\n

Males especially are particularly vulnerable when it comes to this subject matter.<\/p>\n

It has a lot to do with our male ego.<\/p>\n

What\u2019s the first thing that males ask each other when they meet?<\/p>\n

\u2018So what do you do?\u2019<\/p>\n

We then begin to respond with the job, the business, the project or whatever else we \u2018do\u2019 \u2013 and this is what defines us. Or that\u2019s what we think.<\/p>\n

We may just as well ask\u2026 \u2018So what do you make? (in dollars that is) \u00a0as if that is what also defines us.<\/p>\n

Personally, I would rather know \u2018who you are\u2019 than \u2018what you do\u2019.<\/p>\n

Why?<\/p>\n

In My Mid Twenties I Went Into Business<\/strong><\/p>\n

In my mid twenties I went into business with a relative of mine and found myself in the position of a director of a multi-media company.<\/p>\n

However, as the years passed I discovered that the direction my relative was taking the company (who happened to be 6 years older than me) was a direction that I could no longer support.<\/p>\n

So I resigned.<\/p>\n

The problem I then faced though stemmed from the fact that I had allowed my identity to become intimately and inextricably entwined with that business. It was who I was, and I had poured so much of my heart, my soul, my finances, my all into its creation \u2013 that when the business was removed from my life I suddenly lost my personal identity.<\/p>\n

I Became Violent<\/strong><\/p>\n

I became depressed, angry and even (I am ashamed to write) violent. Not against those whom I felt had betrayed both my family and I \u2013 but I actually became violent against the very ones I loved \u2013 my wife and my young children.<\/p>\n

I was so frustrated with my circumstances that I became an eruptive volcano that could explode unpredictably at any moment.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t know who I was. I didn\u2019t know what to do, who to go to, and how to re-forge a new identity.<\/p>\n

When people asked me what I did I couldn\u2019t give an answer, and it just made me angrier.<\/p>\n

My life had been derailed, detoured, and at that point I was convinced that it had been utterly destroyed.<\/p>\n

At the height of my anger I found myself raging around my house while my wife and three young children (they are now young adults) took refuge in our bedroom – all huddled together on our bed.<\/p>\n

My Wake Up Call<\/strong><\/p>\n

When I entered the room, there were the four people whom I deeply loved hugging each other for protection, their eyes filled with fear.<\/p>\n

I stopped in my tracks.<\/p>\n

I immediately left the scene, stormed outside and gave myself a stern talking to \u2013 \u2018Peter, if you keep going the way you\u2019re going, you\u2019re going to lose everything – even those who love you so deeply\u2019.<\/p>\n

I then returned to my family transformed \u2013 sought their forgiveness, and peace finally reigned within our household.<\/p>\n

Never again have I attached my self-worth or my identity to what I do \u2013 and the things (or people rather) whom I am most proud of are my beautiful wife of more than 28 years and my three children.<\/p>\n

Business, fame, wealth come and go, but family is forever.<\/p>\n

You & I Are Defined By Who We Are \u2013 Not What We Do<\/strong><\/p>\n

So whenever I meet someone for the very first time I never ask the question, \u2018So what do you do?\u2019<\/p>\n

I ask this: \u2018So how do you keep yourself busy each week?\u2019<\/p>\n

Personally, I am not impressed or unimpressed by what people do or even by what people make. I would rather get to know who you are \u2013 for it is who you are that I wish to inspire to be the best you possible.<\/p>\n

You are a worthy human being \u2013 no matter what season you find yourself in.<\/p>\n

Whether you have a job, are between careers, own a business or are owned by a business, are a bankrupt, or find yourself in a place where you are still trying to work out what you\u2019re going to do when you grow up \u2013 remember this one thing: what you do makes no difference.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s who you are, and also know this \u2013 that you are loved, respected, worthy and talented. \u00a0You are brilliant, one-of-a-kind, magnificent, and bursting with potential.<\/p>\n

Your best days are before you because you are unique, and you are YOU.<\/p>\n

So let me ask you one question though: how have you overcome your own personal identity crisis?<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Motivational Memo:<\/strong> Be proud of who you are, for you are not defined by what you do.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Peter G. James Sinclair is the author of the Personal Success Blueprint, a free report you can download instantly to learn how you can unlock the secret to your own personal success. You can access the report from here – <\/em>http:\/\/www.selfdevelopmentmastermind.com<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n

Related Posts:
\n<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

3 Proven Ways To Once & For All Defeat Procrastination<\/a><\/p>\n

The 4 Positive Price Points of Leadership<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What\u2019s the first thing that males ask each other when they meet?<\/p>\n

\u2018So what do you do?\u2019<\/p>\n

We then begin to respond with the job, the business, the project or whatever else we \u2018do\u2019 \u2013 and this is what defines us. Or that\u2019s what we think.<\/p>\n

We may just as well ask\u2026 \u2018So what do you make? (in dollars that is) as if that is what also defines us. Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12163,"featured_media":7012,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[205,6],"tags":[1008,4653,1551,1549,1550,215,66,4651,4629],"yoast_head":"\nWhy You Should Never Attach Your Identity To What You Do - Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"how have you overcome your own personal identity crisis?\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/why-you-should-never-attach-your-identity-to-what-you-do\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Why You Should Never Attach Your Identity To What You Do - 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