{"id":4860,"date":"2011-02-06T08:37:48","date_gmt":"2011-02-06T16:37:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/?p=4860"},"modified":"2013-10-01T08:32:21","modified_gmt":"2013-10-01T16:32:21","slug":"how-to-win-any-argument-and-get-what-you-really-want","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/how-to-win-any-argument-and-get-what-you-really-want\/","title":{"rendered":"Day 54: How to Win Any Argument (And Get What You Really Want)"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px;\" class=\"sharethis-inline-share-buttons\" ><\/div><div>\n<div>\n<p><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">The fabric of your relationships is fragile. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">The words you use either sew the stitches tighter together, or loosen the seams until the fraying threads can barely hold themselves together.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">The wrong words can rip people apart and make them wonder if they ever had anything in common at all, the right ones can draw people closer and make them wonder how they ever lived apart. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Your words are potent; used well, they can prove your argument, make others look up to you, and help you get what you want most from life. Used in anger or malice, they can cause more long term damage than a physical beating. <!--more--><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Even the blackest bruises one day fade; a scarred soul is torn forever. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Being able to control the language you use, regardless of setting, is a guaranteed way to become a more powerful, more confident you; a you who will be closer to those you love and able to pull more from life\u2019s magic hat. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Use these three tips to make sure you\u2019re using the right words to help create a better, more confident you. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\"><strong>Always Show Respect<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">When you are confident in your ideas, your language and tone should reflect it. Never barrel over another person when they are speaking, just to make yourself heard. By taking the time and patience to state your case well, you can demonstrate a quiet authority over most situations. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Using your words well isn\u2019t about getting your way, it\u2019s about making your case in a way that is difficult to argue with that will leave the people around you nodding in respect or questioning their own position. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Calmly listen to everything the other person is saying. Validate their perspective by highlighting any points you agree with first, then you can intelligently and respectfully rebut their position. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">By listening first, you will always be able to make a clearer, more cogent argument. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Always show the same respect you would expect to be given to you and you will be on the winning end of most arguments without even trying, especially if the other person is the one flying off the handle. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\"><strong>Understand Your Power<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Words can be a cool caress or a stinging slap. Never allow your anger in a moment to dictate the direction of your dialogue. Of course your mood will influence your tone, but choosing your words with care will get you more from most situations than simply barking like a dog with the first words that fly into your mind. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Words have individual value, and selecting the right sequence can affect your entire exchange. Never use hurtful language, when articulate and explanatory language will do. Use the right sequence of sentences to steer the conversation in the best possible direction. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">The person who controls the conversation, controls the outcome. Speak softly and think about your words before you say them, and you will be more likely to get what you want. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\"><strong>Be Sincere<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Say what you mean and mean what you say. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">There is never any point in empty sentences. If you apologize, mean it. Otherwise keep your mouth closed. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Sincerity breeds credibility. If you\u2019re known for your honesty, people will be more interested in hearing you speak. If you are known for a general lack of sincerity, your words will have the value of Monopoly money. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Too much exaggeration, a dismissive tone, or lack of eye contact are all sour notes in the tune of sincerity. Demonstrating true sincerity means you are interested in what others are saying, validating of their ideas and in control of your language. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: small;\">Once you understand the value of your words and have practice using them, you will be able to capture the more confident you that you\u2019ve always wanted to be. <\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The FREE PickTheBrain &#8220;90 Days to a Better You&#8221; eCourse was built to give you more confidence than you ever thought possible. You get one confidence boosting email a day, a motivational quote, and a photo to inspire you &#8211; all for Free<\/p>\n<p>Join us today&#8230;<\/p>\n<form action=\"https:\/\/revmedia.infusionsoft.com\/AddForms\/processFormSecure.jsp\" method=\"POST\"><input id=\"infusion_xid\" type=\"hidden\" name=\"infusion_xid\" value=\"6106f4017338d0145273ecf19266b5fa\" \/> <input id=\"infusion_type\" type=\"hidden\" name=\"infusion_type\" value=\"CustomFormWeb\" \/> <input id=\"infusion_name\" type=\"hidden\" name=\"infusion_name\" value=\"PTB: 90 Days to a Better You\" \/> <input class=\"default-input\" id=\"Contact0Email\" onclick=\"this.value='';\" type=\"text\" name=\"Contact0Email\" size=\"15\" value=\"Email Address\" \/> <input class=\"button np inf-button\" id=\"Submit\" type=\"submit\" name=\"Submit\" value=\"Boost My Confidence\" \/><\/form>\n<\/div>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Arial;\"><span style=\"font-size: large;\"><em><em>Sean Platt is an author of\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/fourseasonsbook.com\/\">books about life<\/a>, <\/em><a href=\"http:\/\/ghostwriterdad.com\/\"><em>professional ghostwriter<\/em><\/a><em>, and\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/writerdad.com\">awesome dad<\/a><\/em><em>. Life\u2019s better when you <\/em><a href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/seanplatt\"><em>follow him on Twitter.<\/em><\/a><br \/>\n<\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The wrong words can rip people apart and make them wonder if they ever had anything in common at all, the right ones can draw people closer and make them wonder how they ever lived apart.  <a href=\"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/how-to-win-any-argument-and-get-what-you-really-want\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12163,"featured_media":4876,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[754],"tags":[984,4646,4653,983,745,982,223,66,4651,4629],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v19.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Day 54: How to Win Any Argument (And Get What You Really Want) - Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Your words are potent; used well, they can prove your argument, make others look up to you, and help you get what you want most from life. 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