{"id":47548,"date":"2017-02-14T20:37:30","date_gmt":"2017-02-15T04:37:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/?p=47548"},"modified":"2017-05-27T08:46:18","modified_gmt":"2017-05-27T16:46:18","slug":"how-to-install-calmfidence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/how-to-install-calmfidence\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Install CALMfidence"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px;\" class=\"sharethis-inline-share-buttons\" ><\/div><p><\/p>\n<p>\u201cIf I am not for myself, then who will be for me? And if I am only for myself, then what am I? And if not now, when?\u201d<br \/>\n-Rabbi Hillel<br \/>\nWhen the alarm goes off, does it only add to the \u201calarm\u201d you felt when you went to sleep?<\/p>\n<p>Is your big internal clock ticking loudly with the usual suspects?<br \/>\n\u2022 Anxiety?<br \/>\n\u2022 Indecision?<br \/>\n\u2022 Self-Criticism?<br \/>\n\u2022 Sadness?<br \/>\n\u2022 Lack of perspective?<\/p>\n<p>Too many people don\u2019t wake up with the alarm, they\u2019re alarmed when they go to sleep.<\/p>\n<p>Imagine waking up, enjoying life, and going to sleep with\u2026CALMfidence.<\/p>\n<p>Get Yourself Ready\u2026Message Yourself<\/p>\n<p>What\u2019s CALMfidence? How do you get it? What\u2019s it look like?<\/p>\n<p>Hold on\u2026remember something.<\/p>\n<p>How?<\/p>\n<p>Message yourself.<\/p>\n<p>Messaging has two parts:<\/p>\n<p>1) Finding\/defining yourself<br \/>\n2) Telling someone<\/p>\n<p>For CALMfidence, \u201cown\u201d your happiest\/most loved self.<\/p>\n<p>You\u2019ve already done it, just guest-owned it for others.<\/p>\n<p>Do you 1) think of others first and wish the best for them always; 2) stand in for the strong part of them until they can pick themselves back up?<\/p>\n<p>Thanks for telling them 1) they count in the world; 2) they have everything they need inside to matter; and 3) they don\u2019t need anyone else\u2019s approval to feel good and be their best selves.<\/p>\n<p>Move from Guest Owner to Self-Owner<\/p>\n<p>Okay, so you\u2019ve been \u201cfor others\u201d.<\/p>\n<p>Now, be the first and last of Hillel\u2019s ideas.<\/p>\n<p>Self-love and self-accept.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes you\u2019ll do better than others, but resolve to do it now.<\/p>\n<p>Own Time<\/p>\n<p>You can own this mind- and spirit-set safely. How about closing your eyes and stroking your heart? It\u2019s a great and quite way to \u201cown\u201d CALMfidence.<br \/>\n\ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n<p>Close your eyes, image raising a child, or being the best possible friend or spouse possible.<\/p>\n<p>But own that ultimate compassion for yourself!<\/p>\n<p>Remember some wonderful time when everything was easy.<\/p>\n<p>You deserve it as much as those you\u2019ve helped. Accept your life-changing gift that you offer to the ones you hold dearest.<br \/>\nThat\u2019s the \u201cRoyal Road\u201d to CALMfidence.<\/p>\n<p>Here\u2019s what it looks like!<\/p>\n<p>CALMfidence Inventory<\/p>\n<p>-You\u2019re present, avoiding being one place with your body, but somewhere else with your mind.<\/p>\n<p>-You pay yourself first. That\u2019s much more that an economic statement. Every success isn\u2019t about impressing others, it\u2019s building up your own emotional bank account, your assets. Don\u2019t leave your success at the water\u2019s edge of your mind and spirit. Deposit it!<\/p>\n<p>-You know you can accomplish more by doing less and have more than enough time to do all required.<\/p>\n<p>-Your instincts are so good, you do NOTHING, rather than indulge inlazy and compulsive productivity.<\/p>\n<p>-You have enough space in mind and spirit to make unhurried choices every minute of every day to find not only the best action, but the best thought available.<\/p>\n<p>-You only compete with yourself.<\/p>\n<p>-Your mindset is always creating, a growth mindset.<\/p>\n<p>-You don\u2019t ignore negativity, but you observe it, you don\u2019t judge yourself.<\/p>\n<p>-You\u2019re self-compassionate without effort.<\/p>\n<p>-Because you\u2019re generous to yourself, you are effortlessly so to others.<\/p>\n<p>-Your aspirations are rooted in human being, not human doing.<\/p>\n<p>-You know where \u201cTrue North\u201d lies and assess everything on whether it will get you there.<\/p>\n<p>-You don\u2019t need external approval or attention to be their best self.<\/p>\n<p>Isn\u2019t this the message you want to send to the world, simply by being your happiest self?<\/p>\n<p>You\u2019ve Owned CALMfidence\u2026now use it!<\/p>\n<p>Next time you feel stressed, ask yourself, what would it take to be CALMfident? Practice so that you remember.<br \/>\nWhen in doubt, reset owning your most relaxed and poised self to get the effects above.<\/p>\n<p>1-Know that you\u2019ve had it before, so you\u2019ll get it again. Don\u2019t hesitate to simply STOP and REMEMBER a time of ultimate peace and confidence.<br \/>\nYou\u2019ve had one, no matter how seldom or long ago. Find it!<\/p>\n<p>2-Be patient, be present and kind to yourself, even in a negative time. DO NOT criticize yourself.<\/p>\n<p>3-Write down how you are feeling every day, be specific, both good days and bad.<\/p>\n<p>4-Record, at least in your mind, and, better yet, on paper or in some word file, everything you did that was positive on any given day, no matter how minor.<\/p>\n<p>5-Remember that there is only NOW. You only have to feel good NOW, not in a minute, not in an hour, not tomorrow, or next year, or in a decade.<br \/>\nJust NOW.<\/p>\n<p>CALMfidence potential was and is your birthright. You just have to rediscover it and refresh to keep finding it.<\/p>\n<p>After all, it\u2019s part of being kind to yourself\u2026always.<\/p>\n<p>As Hillel might say, the rest is commentary.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><em>Lars Nielsen writes full-spectrum communication, and now\u2019s your chance to sign up for his newsletter for his website, Make Message Matter. Go to <a href=\"http:\/\/makemessagematter.com\/\">http:\/\/makemessagematter.com\/<\/a> and, download his free guide to messaging, &#8220;How to Make YOUR Message Matter Cheat Sheet&#8221;.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Too many people don\u2019t wake up with the alarm, they\u2019re alarmed when they go to sleep.<br \/>\nImagine waking up, enjoying life, and going to sleep with\u2026CALMfidence. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/how-to-install-calmfidence\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11620,"featured_media":47611,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[205,32,6],"tags":[1743,5393,5811,4653,2060,66,207,4629],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v19.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Install CALMfidence<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Too many people don\u2019t wake up with the alarm, they\u2019re alarmed when they go to sleep. 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