{"id":4599,"date":"2011-02-18T13:00:09","date_gmt":"2011-02-18T21:00:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/?p=4599"},"modified":"2013-09-04T13:16:20","modified_gmt":"2013-09-04T21:16:20","slug":"your-life-will-stop-sucking-when-you-do","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/your-life-will-stop-sucking-when-you-do\/","title":{"rendered":"Day 42: Your Life Will Stop Sucking When You Do"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>

<\/a><\/p>\n

Do you ever have days where it feels as though the whole world\u2019s against you?<\/p>\n

Is it getting to the point where it seems you\u2019ll never have an ultimate relationship or career, much less an amazing life?<\/p>\n

Does it seem as if you have a \u201ctype\u201d regarding relationships and you continue meeting people who don\u2019t get, love or respect you?<\/p>\n

You are not alone.<\/p>\n

Everyone has a bad day, or has experienced more than one crappy relationship.\u00a0 But if you find yourself in Ground Hog Day deja vu, with the same feeling surfacing no matter what situation you\u2019re in, you must look at the common denominator\u2014you.<\/p>\n

If you want to gain control of your life and build the confidence you need, have the life you deserve by getting YOU out of YOUR way.<\/p>\n

Your Perception Is Your Reality<\/p>\n

When drama flares up and problems arise, do you blame someone or something, or do you gravitate toward solutions?\u00a0 You might find yourself doing a bit of both depending on the situation.\u00a0 In either case, your reaction is tied to your perception of what happened.<\/p>\n

Too often, you might find yourself blaming a person or circumstance for the aggravation. The reality is, no matter what the trigger, familiars often equal a pattern. To build your confidence and take control of your life, it\u2019s mission critical to recognize how your central processing unit programmed from early childhood actual works.<\/p>\n

Are You A Mac or A PC?<\/p>\n

Your internal CPU is built in the language of your beliefs and experiences, which by default determine the contextual filters you apply to situations. Just like data management programs such as Word, Excel or PowerPoint, you process data to apply meaning to every situation.<\/p>\n

You build confidence in your ability to process information when you see situations from multiple perspectives. Focusing on changing everything but the internal meaning and importance you place on the issue will not serve you.<\/p>\n

It doesn\u2019t matter at all WHY it\u2019s happening or who is doing it\u2014the lesson is in how you process it. \u00a0Focus on changing how you feel about what happened; not on ensuring what happened never happens again.<\/p>\n

Suffering Is Not In The Fact, It\u2019s In The Perception Of The Fact<\/p>\n

Imagine you ask your best friend to dinner and she declines because she says she\u2019s too tired.\u00a0 That weekend, you go to the mall by yourself and you see your best friend laughing it up with another person.\u00a0 Devastated, you go home feeling left out and rejected, even plotting how you might end the friendship.\u00a0 Two days later, she casually mentions that her sister who she hasn\u2019t seen in years dropped in unexpectedly and dragged her out to dinner on Friday night.\u00a0 Instantly you feel your gloom lift, you realize she\u2019s not a two-faced liar who needs to sleep with one eye open, and the dark cloud hanging over your head evaporates.<\/p>\n

Did the facts change?\u00a0 Or did your perception change?<\/p>\n

Once you understand you are not a victim of situations and can control the meaning or importance you place on them, you will be well on your way to becoming more confident every day.<\/p>\n

Be The Change You Want To See In The World<\/p>\n

If you become aware that you are the common denominator in every situation, you will be more focused on fine-tuning your filers, and less focused on changing the people pushing YOUR buttons.\u00a0 By limiting the amount of power you give to each of these buttons, you will become immune to other people trying to move their issues and perceptions into something YOU need to solve.<\/p>\n

Know who you are and own it. If you are sensitive and easily get your feelings hurt, curb those feelings by placing less meaning on what people think about you, and more with how you feel about yourself.\u00a0 See each confrontation as an opportunity to strengthen your resolve and maintain your frequency.\u00a0 If you wake up on top of the world, stay there by compartmentalizing how you feel and how they feel.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

This isn\u2019t going to be easy, but it\u2019s worth it.\u00a0 Try to inspire those around you by acknowledging and appreciating how they feel, but set boundaries by using statements such as\u2026<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry you are feeling as if you aren\u2019t important to me, but it\u2019s not true.\u00a0 Is there something I can say or do to make you feel better?\u201d<\/p>\n

And if you are triggered, be aware of your perception and focus on that, not what they actually did or said, by simply saying\u2026<\/p>\n

\u201cI realize this is my own stuff, but right now I feel unheard and unimportant; do you think we could start this conversation over?\u201d<\/p>\n

The best way for you to change your life, is for you to change the lens you use to view your world.\u00a0 Few people have a personal vendetta against other people, you included.\u00a0 So when your day starts to suck, see how you are contributing to it by getting to the root cause:\u00a0 your perception and your reaction.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The FREE PickTheBrain “90 Days to a Better You” eCourse was built to give you more confidence than you ever thought possible. You get one confidence boosting email a day, a motivational quote, and a photo to inspire you – all for Free<\/p>\n

Join us today…<\/p>\n

<\/form>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Lori Taylor is a direct marketing specialist <\/a><\/p>\n

and <\/a>personal development writer.<\/a><\/p>\n

Follow<\/a><\/p>\n

her on Twitter<\/a><\/p>\n

.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Is it getting to the point where it seems you\u2019ll never have an ultimate relationship or career, much less an amazing life?<\/p>\n

Does it seem as if you have a \u201ctype\u201d regarding relationships and you continue meeting people who don\u2019t get, love or respect you? Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12163,"featured_media":4652,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[754,6],"tags":[939,936,938,940,4651,4629],"yoast_head":"\nDay 42: Your Life Will Stop Sucking When You Do - Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"If you want to gain control of your life and build the confidence you need, have the life you deserve by getting YOU out of YOUR way.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/your-life-will-stop-sucking-when-you-do\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Day 42: Your Life Will Stop Sucking When You Do - 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