{"id":34313,"date":"2015-07-26T21:37:51","date_gmt":"2015-07-27T05:37:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/?p=34313"},"modified":"2015-07-28T20:29:37","modified_gmt":"2015-07-29T04:29:37","slug":"four-ways-clean-act-become-better-person","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pickthebrain.com\/blog\/four-ways-clean-act-become-better-person\/","title":{"rendered":"Four Ways to Clean up Your Act and Become a Better Person"},"content":{"rendered":"
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<\/p>\n

Counting your change as you exit the local supermarket, you discover that the cashier accidentally handed you back a ten dollar bill instead of a five. \u00a0You pause, debating whether to go back and correct the error or pocket your modest windfall.<\/p>\n

What you do next may depend on how fresh the fruit smelled in the produce section. \u00a0If the tomatoes were over-ripe enough to emit an unpleasant odor, that might be all it takes to set your moral compass spinning.<\/p>\n

In a series of social science experiments, researchers observed <\/a>how exposure to disgusting smells or images can influence our attitudes and behavior: \u00a0the same self-protective reflex that makes us back away from an assault upon our senses can also make us recoil from offensive behavior. \u00a0Needless to say, rotten tomatoes have nothing to do with personal character; but once our feelings of disgust have been activated toward repugnant pictures or noxious odors we are more likely to feel aversion toward objectionable conduct and become increasingly repelled by unethical behavior.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s the good news. \u00a0What\u2019s really ironic, however, is that the same stimuli that make us less tolerant of improper actions by others make us more likely to engage in those same kinds of actions ourselves.<\/p>\n

After determining the benefits of self-protective response, the researchers then observed that individuals exposed to disgusting sensory input became more likely to lie, cheat, and steal. \u00a0On the one hand, the impulse for self-preservation urges us to distance ourselves from dubious people; on the other hand, that same impulse simultaneously prods us to seek advantage over others by engaging in dubious behavior ourselves.<\/p>\n

The silver lining is that the problem suggests its own solution. \u00a0Going one step further, researchers discovered that when the subjects exposed to disgusting stimuli were then asked to evaluate cleaning products or to wash their hands, their level of ethical behavior returned to previous levels. \u00a0Even the thought <\/em>of cleanliness impelled people to clean up their act.<\/p>\n

The research shows how precarious a tightrope we have to walk if we want to live moral and ethical lives. \u00a0If we are accepting of everything, we lose our moral compass and leave ourselves vulnerable to unscrupulous people. \u00a0If we turn up our noses too much — either literally or figuratively — we risk turning into the unscrupulous people we disdain.<\/p>\n

Here are four\u00a0strategies for negotiating the perilous course that lies before us.<\/p>\n

Look on the bright side. \u00a0<\/strong>Internal and external cleanliness are indeed next to Godliness. \u00a0As King David says in Psalms, it is one with clean hands and a pure heart who rises to the level of holiness. \u00a0By looking for the best in others and focussing on what is good in our lives and in our world, we naturally become more conscious of how to remain in a state of moral cleanliness.<\/p>\n

People don\u2019t complain because they\u2019re unhappy; they\u2019re unhappy because they complain. \u00a0When we devote too much attention to all that\u2019s wrong, our sour attitude infects our entire worldview, turning us into cynics and scoffers who see the worst in everything. \u00a0No one likes to be around chronic complainers, so pity the chronic complainer who always has to be around himself.<\/p>\n

Rather than fixating on the 1{54c12dad2cc2b53ae830e39915b1a3e70288dbcbbeb8bbf8395437c5dc3c512c} that\u2019s wrong, exalt in the 99{54c12dad2cc2b53ae830e39915b1a3e70288dbcbbeb8bbf8395437c5dc3c512c} that\u2019s right. \u00a0By exuding a pleasant \u201cfragrance,\u201d you\u2019ll be a happier person, and you\u2019ll make those around you happier as well.<\/p>\n

Rethink tolerance<\/strong>. \u00a0The ideal of \u201ctolerance\u201d has been elevated to a level of religious doctrine. \u00a0But too much tolerance puts us in danger of forgetting Edmund Burke\u2019s eternal truism that the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing<\/em>. \u00a0If we aren\u2019t repulsed by immoral behavior, we won\u2019t take the precautions to protect ourselves from villains, much less stand against their villainy in the protection of others.<\/p>\n

Judge every person favorably<\/em>, declare the sages of the Talmud. \u00a0But that does not mean we should excuse or overlook wickedness. \u00a0Rather, it adjures us to try to interpret morally ambiguous actions in a favorable light, presume positive intent wherever possible, and look for reasons why another person might have strayed from the straight path. \u00a0By doing so, we raise our own awareness so that we might avoid the same pitfalls.<\/p>\n

Avoid toxicity<\/strong>. \u00a0There is true evil in the world. \u00a0But not everyone who disagrees with us is evil, just as not everyone who agrees with us is a saint. \u00a0Even when we\u2019re right, we should conduct ourselves with civility and respect towards others. \u00a0Not only does this protect us from the caustic fallout of negativity; it also increases the chances we can convince others to consider our point of view.<\/p>\n

But some people turn every disagreement into a personal crusade, indulging in shrill, ad hominem attacks rather than measured, cogent arguments. \u00a0We do ourselves a favor by putting distance between them and us, even when they\u2019re on our side.<\/p>\n

Keep you balance<\/strong>. \u00a0Life really is a tightrope walk. \u00a0The balanced path lies somewhere between optimism and realism, someplace between the bonds that tie us to others and the distance we need to remain our unique selves.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s easy to forget that our attitudes are our own, that others only control our responses when we allow them to have influence over us. \u00a0If we want to be upright, ethical, and happy people, we have to take great care how we relate to the unpleasant realities of the world around us: \u00a0we need to get close enough to know the difference between good and evil, but keep enough distance so that we don\u2019t get swept up in moral confusion and lose our way.<\/p>\n

As much as we might like to see life\u2019s choices as black and white, personal growth occurs in the gray areas. \u00a0We can successfully navigate the complex paths of life by sniffing out the scent of integrity and virtue.<\/p>\n

Rabbi Yonason Goldson<\/a>, a talmudic scholar and former hitchhiker, circumnavigator, and newspaper columnist, lives with his wife in St. Louis, Missouri, where he teaches, writes, and lectures. \u00a0\u00a0His new book Proverbial Beauty: \u00a0Secrets for Success and Happiness from the Wisdom of the Ages<\/a> is available on Amazon<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As much as we might like to see life\u2019s choices as black and white, personal growth occurs in the gray areas. 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