Need Some Great Advice? Ask Death

Death is a subject that few are comfortable with.  Yet, making death your best friend can enhance your life in ways you might not otherwise imagine.

One of the most effective practices recommended by traditional Toltec teachers, is called, “Using death as an adviser”. Deceased author of over ten books of Toltec wisdom, Carlos Castaneda said…

“Death is the only wise adviser that we have. Whenever you feel, as you always do, that everything is going wrong and you’re about to be annihilated, turn to your death and ask if that is so. Your death will tell you that you’re wrong; that nothing really matters outside its touch. Your death will tell you, ‘I haven’t touched you yet….In a world where death is the hunter, my friend, there is no time for regrets or doubts. There is only time for decisions.”

Decisions are the key.

Every moment of every day of your life, you are making decisions.  How many of those decisions are based on the fact that you are a being who is not only going to die, but could die at any moment?  For example…

If most people knew they were going to die tomorrow, or next week, or even in a year, they would probably focus on just a few things…

  • Spending time with their loved ones
  • Forgiving and seeking forgiveness
  • Taking actions that they feel would make the world a better place
  • Doing the things they most enjoy doing — DON’T IGNORE THIS ONE
  • Tying up loose ends
  • Careful planning to make every moment count

Can you imagine what your life would be like if you were living like this now?

We don’t do this though.  Instead we make decisions based on fear.  We tell ourselves we don’t have time to do those things — that we have to take care of what is “important”.  It’s a sad fact that oftentimes what we think is most important, is least important.

Don Juan Matus, Castaneda’s benefactor, said, “Your problem is that you think you have all the time in the world.”  He told him that because he never took death into account, he didn’t bother to take care of what was important — living as if he was going to live forever.

If you knew you would die tomorrow, would you spend your day off taking your daughter horseback riding as you promised, or would you let your boss talk you into getting some overtime?  Who would you feel more comfortable letting down?  Ohhhhh, but you say, “That would be irresponsible.  I could get fired, and then where would my daughter be?”

Well, I don’t know about your daughter, but I can suggest that you might do well to consider that your  job may not be the most harmonious one for you.

May I be so bold as to suggest that you may be wasting your time?

Ask your death what you are here to do.  You’ll be surprised to find out that people, including you, are most prosperous when they find and develop their own unique and special gift, or talent — their life mission.  You will discover that your life mission is also your passion.  In other words, you will love doing this more than any other work.  It’s what you were made for.

Here’s something you will hear me say over and over…

You And Your Path Are One

There’s no time for fear based decisions, and there’s no time to keep putting off dealing with the things you need to deal with.

I can’t count how many times I have delayed making a decision simply because I didn’t want to look at the issues I would have to examine first.  We all do that all the time.  We put things off because they are overwhelming, annoying,  or confusing.  We tell ourselves, “I will take care of that later”.

Want to know what all of those things hanging over your head like black clouds do to you?…

…They cause STRESS!

They also cause depression, anxiety, and low self esteem as you judge yourself for your ineffectiveness and inefficiency.

Want some good advice?…

  1. Take some time to sit down with your best adviser, your death, and ask what would be the best actions you can take in your life.   Keep this valuable friend always in the back of your mind to keep you from slipping  back into unawareness or complacency.
  2. Start working through these self esteem worksheets to discover and eliminate the self defeating beliefs that cause you to make fear based choices and decisions.

Have a nice journey,

Sky Abelar,  creator of the Self Esteem Guru website


Erin shows overscheduled, overwhelmed women how to do less so that they can achieve more. Traditional productivity books—written by men—barely touch the tangle of cultural pressures that women feel when facing down a to-do list. How to Get Sh*t Done will teach you how to zero in on the three areas of your life where you want to excel, and then it will show you how to off-load, outsource, or just stop giving a damn about the rest.

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