Day 16: You’re Making Yourself Fat, Not Happy: Here’s How to Dump Your Artificial Lover

Written by Lori Taylor - 14 Comments
Categories: 90 days

Do you know what’s best about a salty bowl of chips, queso and a yummy margarita?

They never tell you no, they won’t leave you and, honestly, they don’t care if you’re fat.

But what do THEY do for YOU?

Do you rise the next morning patting yourself on the back, celebrating your great decision to signal the waitress for the 3rd time you are running low on chips?  I doubt it.  And if you do, this post probably isn’t for you.  But, if you’ve ever eaten any food and thought, “This is better than sex,” I’m talking directly to you.

If you want to love yourself more than you love your next French fry, start treating your physical self the way you would treat a Ferrari.  Your body is a gift, no matter how big or how small, and it’s yours to have for as long as you take care of it.

No matter what you do, please stop the dieting.  It’s madness.  If you want to look like the models in the magazines, Photoshop yourself thin and buy a skinny mirror!  If you want to get real and stop emotionally eating now, try a stop, drop and roll technique to break up with your imaginary lover…permanently!

Stop Being Afraid Of Being Hungry

Did you know most people don’t let themselves get hungry?  A dietician once told me she believed people eat because they are afraid of being hungry.  It certainly made sense to me.  I’m afraid of low blood sugar, of feeling dizzy, of not being in control of what my next meal might be, and when or how I might get it.

When people feels fear, they naturally turn toward comfort to feel better.  Experts call this “emotional eating” or finding “comfort food.”  Instead of focusing on the lack of food, why don’t you tell yourself it’s awesome being hungry, and look hunger in the eye and say, “Bring it on!”

And, if that doesn’t work?  Keep it simple. By eating every two or three hours, you avoid hunger hitting you over the head with a snack attack, with lies lack-of-energy lies scaring you straight to Chipsville for a comfort fix.

Cut up tons of vegetables and fruit before you get hungry, put them in individual bags and place them in your refrigerator. (An incredible sweet snack to try—apples sprinkled with Stevia and cinnamon. Yummy!) Simply having healthy snacks handy will immediately reduce food’s control over your mood.

Drop Your Focus on Feelings During Meals or Snacks

To challenge your cravings, focus on what you truly feel.  Do you eat when you are happy or sad?  Or both?  Do you grab a bag of chips when boredom strikes?

Once you identify the feeling, look for it to reappear.  When it does, you must choose something else to satisfy it, even if for only 5 minutes. Call a friend or set up a buddy system.  Listen to music or read a magazine.  Under no circumstances should you eat your way through your mood ever again.

Yes, I understand this is going to be hard.  A big bowl of ice cream topped with hot fudge, or a gooey piece of cheese pizza is hard not to love. And, it’s a lot sexier than a bowl of broccoli, right?  But, isn’t that the point?  Gas isn’t sexy.  It stinks, and it’s a pain filling your gas tank with, but you wouldn’t grab a glass of coke, pour it in the tank and expect to get very far would you?

Roll With It

You had a tough day at work, your mom stopped by, or you saw your ex last night on an Eharmony TV ad. You ran to the store grabbed cheese, crackers, wine, Salami, Oreos, Twinkies and any other childhood friends you can muster.

It happens—roll with it!

The first step to successfully dumping your artificial lover permanently is to be aware. Even if you can’t help yourself in that moment, being aware of what happened instead of feeling as if you have no control over the situation means you are moving in the right direction.  Whatever you do, don’t let your good buddies Guilt and Regret get to chatting.

Fight hard and focus to find your long-lost lover Gratitude so he can tell you how magnificent you are.  Listen as he tells you how proud he is of you for starting the process of learning to love yourself more than you love living for your next bowl of popcorn.

Most of all, remember living a purposeful life is about living day to day, setting your goals to do a little better than you did yesterday, and accepting yourself in every moment of life.  You might not always like your choices, but accept them and tell your artificial lover to hit the road!

 

The FREE PickTheBrain “90 Days to a Better You” eCourse was built to do exactly that!

Click here to get started NOW.

( It only takes 20 seconds of courage to do something amazing. It’s your time! See you on the inside. )

 

Lori Taylor is a direct marketing specialist and personal development writer. Follow her on Twitter.

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No registration is necessary for the free webinar, but please sign up on the Self-Confidence Course wait list to receive an email later in the week with log-in details. (This does not commit you to taking the course but is a way for us to contact you with the log-in and password.)

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  • http://www.myspace.com/keatonmorris Bucky

    whenever i crave junk food, i drink a bunch of water and then eat something really healthy. then i don’t feel like going to the snack machine anymore.

  • http://fingersandtoes.wordpress.com Sarah

    I love food. I think there’s a place for junk food, as long as it’s an occasional treat in the context of a healthy diet. But I don’t see why “comfort eating” and “healthy eating” have to be mutually exclusive. I don’t think there’s anything more comforting than a big bowl of soup, or some noodles with stir fried vegetables, or rice with mackerel, super fresh organic vegetables with hummous, a big bowl of porridge with honey for breakfast, the list goes on and on.

  • http://hanofharmony.com The Vizier

    Hi Lori,

    I believe that we should practice moderation when it comes to eating. I don’t think diets will work if you are not going to make it a part of your life on a permanent basis. Instead it would be more prudent to make small adjustments to your eating habits until you get used to smaller amounts of food or being a little hungry when it is not your meal times.

    Focusing on work or some other activity is a great way to keep your mind off food as well. I am not a foodie, in fact I would rather entertain myself with a book or a game. So I am not bothered in the least by a little hunger.

    I like how you suggest that we must be aware before we can deal with our eating habits. That is very true, unless you know what is happening, it is hard to take measures to deal with it. But after awareness must come a burning desire to change.

    Thank you for sharing this helpful post!

  • Michelle

    used to be an emotional eater but for sure learned to get something “healthy” out instead of that bag of chips. GREAT READ….

  • Shauna

    I eat when I am stressed and I get stressed a lot. Just going to work is stressful. I eat when I’m sad and depressed – I still haven’t gotten over my X – it has been 7 months now :( . I eat when I worry – and I’m always worried; about losing my job, not getting married, whether or not I should have a baby and when. I get hungry when I study (or just feel the need to chew). I get home from work late and get so hungry the later it gets I just have to eat ( at nights).

    Habits are really hard to break. But I figure a bit more planning is needed on my part. But vegetables and fruits are so expensive and hard to get where I live.

  • http://revmediamarkting.com Lori Taylor

    Thanks for the great feedback (no pun intended – lol). This is a touchy subject because we like to believe there are no quick fixes, but in my experience there are I just don’t choose to use them. I LOVE the comment about drinking 1 glass of water before eating. the body does interpret thirst as hunger. and I am guilty of not keeping myself hydrated which lowers the functionality of my body. I should just write a post on DRINK MORE WATER, because it WORKS. :) Thanks for that reminder.

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    [...] You’re Making Yourself Fat, not Happy: Here’s How To Dump Your Artificial Lover: The title says it all, Lori Taylor’s humorous post about how to take back control of your bad habits, nails it! [...]

  • http://www.JoyofQuotes.com Marta Davidovich Ockuly

    You hit the nail on the head for me. Food has been my lover. With that said – no logic, knowledge, balance, or ‘committing to moderation’ works. It’s all about dumping that false lover for true love. People who have not ‘been there’ have no idea. Resist judgement and ‘logical fixes’…they do not work when you are dealing with emotional (affective) issues. Period. We all have our own answers. Listening and acting from love rather than compulsion is key. Stopping to feel the hunger is huge. Having a false lover comes with fear of abandonment. Loss of what small pleasure you know you will find in his company. I joyfully embrance new ways of being with myself and honor you for your courage in sharing.

  • http://www.collinsforsuccess.com Collins

    Hi Lori,Thanks.

  • http://www.theunblogger.com Marnie

    I find relaxing to be a good deterrent to overeating. I haven’t mastered it yet, but it’s something I’m learning slowly each day.

  • jade

    Sometimes the food and getting fat is like a protection from future lovers. When you think mmm i shouldnt be eating this im full, the voice that says what does it matter no ones going to see me naked anyway over rides it. im still trying to learn it does matter, i see myself naked all the time it would be nicer to be proud of what i saw

  • http://flawlessconfidence.com Martin K.

    Snacks are bad for you and eating every two hours can make you feel more hungrier than eating two or three meals a day. I’m a big believer in intermittent fasting, which is probably one of the easiest ways to burn fat + it’s very healthy (prevents diabetes, probably increases one’s lifespan and boosts one’s immune system). Try it!