happiness

The One Question That Will Lead You To Happiness

My least favorite word in the English language is the word “discern” for one reason and one reason only — it’s so difficult to accomplish!

In our lives, we’re asked to discern what is best for ourselves and our friends and family all the time, but the right paths are difficult to identify, let alone choose.

How are we supposed to know the right path at every single moment? Achieving magic-eight-ball levels of clarity and vision would be awesome, but highly unlikely.

According to the dictionary, to discern is “to perceive or recognize”, which strikes me as fascinating in this context. It means that when we discern what is right for us, we are recognizing something we’ve always known deep inside.

Our instinct is stronger than we ever thought possible.

There’s a guiding light that can help you discern most everything in your life without fault. As with most great answers in life, it starts with a question.

When you need to make a decision in your life (big or small), ask yourself the following question:

Is this liberating or is this limiting?

I promise that you will know the answer, every single time. Whether you are deciding if you want to sign up for a gym or you are on the brink of taking a new job, this question will help you to get to know your own relationship to your new path.

The answer will make you accountable to the fact that you know yourself better than you thought. It will make you responsible for your happiness, and it will show you how to achieve it. It’s a high stakes question, and I challenge you to use it as a guide when things get fuzzy.

When you make choices that help us feel liberated and light, there are various benefits in many aspects of your life. Here are my favorites:

  1. Putting enthusiasm and passion into your projects becomes easy.
    Distinguishing between what projects feel liberating and what methods of accomplishing them feel liberating too will lead you to a day-to-day plan that rejuvenates you instead of draining you. Respecting your body’s energy levels and what feels best at each moment will result in more energetic work.
  2. A newfound peace and calm descend over tasks and relationships.
    When life feels liberating, every step feels lighter. In a world full of lightness and joy, there is less room for anxiety, anger, or frustration.
  3. Being grateful for others and their successes means dropping envy and jealousy off to the side.
    Gratitude is an amazing gift, and so is losing the burden of comparison. When you lead your life to be more liberating to you and only you, there is a separation between what is best for others and what is best for you personally. Respecting that each person’s path is different will help you find joy in other people’s success, instead of comparing their path to yours.
  4. Hard work is welcome, but feeling overwhelmed is not.
    Feeling liberated by your choices in life does not mean that there is no hard work involved. There will be many times when big projects and big relationships will feel both liberating and strenuous — that’s okay. Writing a book or building a business aren’t easy tasks, but they can definitely feel liberating to the right person.

In my life, choosing paths that make me feel light and liberated give me a sensation of returning home, of doing what I was always meant to be doing. I recommend you try it sometime. At every fork in the road, ask yourself, “Is this liberating or is this limiting?”

The hard part isn’t the answer — it’s remembering to ask yourself the question!

Your gut instinct will guide you further than you ever knew, if you just let it have a say.

* * *

Bio: Based out of Managua, Nicaragua Marcella Chamorro just released a book on authenticity in marketing, titled To Be or Like to Be. Follow her blog for tips and thoughts on life/joy hacks & creativity.

 

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  • http://www.motivation.net.au/quotes/inspirational-quotes Inspirational Quotes

    Thanks for this share mate. I have looking for
    this info for quite some time now and I am glad to come across your post.

     

    • http://www.marcellachamorro.com/ Marcella Chamorro

      Glad you’ve enjoyed it!

  • Kazznextdoor

    You are spot on with your question. It really simplifies decision making. Luv it !

  • http://www.facebook.com/michael.platania.5 Michael Platania

    Brilliant!  I’ve been a long believer that if we are not getting the right answers in life it means we are not asking the right questions.  I have not heard of the liberating or limiting question, but will now use this in my life (and may write about it tomorrow on my blog!). Thanks. 

  • http://www.discoveryourpeace.com/ Eri

    Very true!  Our instinct/listening to our body won’t steer us wrong.  Also important to his equation is the courage to challenge the status quo.

    • http://www.marcellachamorro.com/ Marcella Chamorro

      So right. I’m a strong believer in developing the resistance to take steps on our own, even if they are in disaccord with the rest…

  • http://www.easyfinancialtips.com/ Jcrosskey@EasyFinancialTips

    That is a powerful question and straight to the point. We tend get caught up in the analysis of what’s right and what’s wrong for us to the point we don’t take action. Instead action is often taken on us. This cuts to the chase and if you answer it honestly and without influence from others, will guide you in the right direction. Thank you!

    • http://www.marcellachamorro.com/ Marcella Chamorro

      You are so welcome. Frustrating to think the answers have always been right inside us, huh? I take solace in the fact that I can now act and make decisions based on this kind of question in the future. Hope it helps you, too!

  • http://yippeeindex.com/ Elizabeth Crook

    I really love this line: “Our instinct is stronger than we ever thought possible.”

    An uplifting read, perfect for a Friday!

    • http://www.marcellachamorro.com/ Marcella Chamorro

      Glad it was uplifting to you. I’m honored you used such a positive word to describe something I wrote! Cheers

  • http://www.thoughtful-self-improvement.com/Overcome_Shyness.html Natalie

    What a great question to ask yourself! I never thought of it that way.

    Thank You for this post. While reading it in my messy office with my messy desk, I looked around and asked myself if this mess was liberating or limiting? Of course it’s limiting! Then I asked if the act of cleaning it would be limiting or liberating. I was looking for an excuse, but it came up that the act would be liberating. Now I feel motivated to do something about it.

    • http://www.marcellachamorro.com/ Marcella Chamorro

      I’m so glad my article helped you in such an immediate way — as I hope it continues to be helpful in the future. PS. You are motivating me to start cleaning up some of my own spaces, too! Thanks ;)

  • Lian

    May I ask for your opinion, please?

    What if … I felt Limiting, because my wife is pregnant?

  • Drolsmoel

    An interesting quote (see below) I read a few months ago also helped me in making decisions, it’s about asking yourself ‘Why not?’ instead of ‘Why?’.”The word ‘why’ can be a powerful thing when used the
    right way, but too many people use that word to talk themselves out of
    trying new things. Let go of your fears, expand your knowledge, and
    don’t be afraid of new situations. Ask yourself ‘Why Not’
    People
    use the word ‘why’ to stay in their comfortable bubbles of things that
    they already know about. Asking ‘why not’ is about expanding your
    horizons and not having limits. After living a lifestyle of ‘why not’
    you’ll have a greater understanding for when it is appropriate to just
    go with the flow or stop and ask ‘why’ “

    • http://www.marcellachamorro.com/ Marcella Chamorro

      I love that concept! Thanks so much for sharing!

  • http://twitter.com/RangiRangiMag RangiRangi

    If you want to be happy, be.  ~Leo Tolstoy – i strongly agree that !

  • Pranavsiimc

    really beautiful article. liberating it is!!!

    • http://www.marcellachamorro.com/ Marcella Chamorro

      Thanks so much! Glad you found it beautiful.

  • http://imnoaverage.com/ Leo@ImNoAverage.com

    love this line: Gratitude is an amazing gift, and so is losing the burden of comparison.   In this competitive world it’s hard not to compare ourselves to others and envy is the enemy. In the end, we all have our own battles to win and paths to find. 

    Nice article Marcella :)

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