Image courtesy of Hashem Abrishami

In previous articles, I have discussed just how deeply unemployment can affect a person’s self confidence.  And let’s face it, if you don’t feel good, you probably don’t look good.  You see, another downside of unemployment is that it can do damage to your good looks.

I’m certain many of you, as you read this, are shaking your heads or snickering while thinking, “I’ve got plenty more to worry about than what I look like right now.”  And you could be right, but you also might be wrong.  So keep reading.

At first, upon receiving the proverbial axe, the pink slip, you might, that following Monday morning, revel in the fact that you don’t have to wake up at 5:30am to take a shower, do your hair and put on a suit!!!  But several months down the long and winding road of unemployment, several months into wearing the same sweats or baggy jeans, over sized tee shirts and flip flops, you just feel like… well, like crap.  (You’re not looking so hot either. You know it, too.  You haven’t been to the gym or had your hair cut in months.)  And this is only in addition to how bad you feel mentally.

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While Wall Street claims that the recession has run its’ course, the jobless rate continues to hover at more than 10 percent and millions of people are experiencing prolonged unemployment.  In fact, in a recent report put out by Rutgers University entitled “No End in Sight: The Agony of Prolonged Unemployment,” experts state that economic improvements have had little to no positive effects on those still searching for work.  Eight in ten people who lost their job in the recession have yet to find a new one, and those that have found work have been forced to take a pay cut, work without benefits or take a job they don’t like.

Unemployment itself is bad enough and prolonged unemployment, described as those who have been searching for more than 6 months, is quite simply put… a nightmare of the very worst kind.  People have lost their homes, sold valuable possession to make ends meet, borrowed money from friends, dipped into their retirement funds, overlooked medical care and the list goes on and on.

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Image courtesy of Andy Warhol

My father is my hero.  The greatest man I know.  Honestly.  As I have matured through the years, I realize this more every day.  And I am more and more grateful for him every day.

He is a quiet and reserved man… a hard worker, and very successful in most facets of his life.  He spent his entire 45 year career at one company, starting out as an intern making 75 cents an hour to spending the last several years as CEO.  Surely he has weathered several economic recessions, witnessing and even overseeing his fair share of lay-offs, salary cuts and disgruntled employees.  He was fiercely dedicated to his work, and sacrificed a lot of time with his family to fulfill his responsibilities and accomplish his career goals.  He traveled often and spent endless hours at the office.  He was never a 9-5, 40 hours a week, employee.  More like 60-70 hours.

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According to those who follow the cycle of the moon, the solar eclipse that took place on January 15 is actually the day we should all be making New Year resolutions.  Whether it be January 1^st or the 15^th, we all tend to feel pressure to ‘resolve’ ourselves to do something when January rolls around: lose weight, workout, spend less, make amends.  Ultimately, when we revisit New Year’s Eve on that same year, we look back and realize we have fallen short, or even worse, haven’t accomplished any of these resolutions.   And if we haven’t had enough champagne to dull the nagging sense of failure, we are left feeling a little defeated, maybe lazy or worse, without real direction in our lives.

Why do we torture ourselves like this?

And what exactly is a ‘resolution’ anyway?  A resolution is a firm decision to do something. “ I resolve to lose 20lbs. this year.”  “I will stop smoking this year.”  “I am going to run a marathon this year.”  These are all very firm, and certainly noble decisions, but sometimes life itself gets in the way, and our decisions become our burdens simply making us feel guilty for not being able to achieve them.  What if you have spent the entire year trying to quit, but just can’t seem to put the cigarette down, or what if you’re constantly on the road for work, eating out all the time and away from the gym making it impossible to lose the weight?  Why put yourself in a specific box… why commit yourself to the possibility of failure?  Furthermore, and more importantly, why make one decision on one day that you are committed to accomplishing in one year?

A firm decision sets an expectation and more often than not, an expectation is just a resentment in the making.

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Image courtesy of Roy Lichtenstein

With the economy being as tough as it is, and so many people struggling to find work, including many who will read this, it’s very easy to fall into a dark hole of depression and despair.  How will I find another job… when will I find another job?  How will I pay the bills, feed my kids, afford the rent? When will this economy improve… will it EVER improve? As we spend hour upon hour on Craigslist and other sites searching for jobs, sending our resumes into a black hole called the internet, these are the questions that crowd our minds.

Then, of course, there is the interview process.  Our hopes held high with that first phone call: “We were looking over your resume and really like what we see…” only to be shattered later with the second or third call (or better yet, a very impersonal email): “After going through the interview process, we have decided to go with another candidate whose skill set best fits the qualifications of the position.  We wish you the best of luck in your on-going search for employment.”

It’s almost worse than getting laid-off.  Rejection is never easy.  Uncertainty never comfortable.  Unemployment never fun.  Or is it?  Could it be?  If we looked at it from a different perspective, is it possible to find an upside in all of this?

Maybe so.

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