productivity tips

Stuck? 9 Ways to Move Your Life Forward

Feeling stuck is a very disempowering state of mind. You want something, but something else outside of your control is making you feel powerless.

You feel like a victim to your circumstances.

As one of my life coaches suggests, to get unstuck, you’ll want to step outside of your current frame of mind, shift your thinking, and gain a new perspective. You won’t feel stuck once you reclaim ownership over the situation.

Here are the 9 ways to get unstuck and move your life forward.

 

Pinpoint Why You Feel Stuck

Get clear on where you’re stuck and why you feel this way. Do you feel stuck in your job? Why? Are you stuck in your social life or in a relationship? See how well you can identify more exactly where you are stuck and what’s happening for you in this area that you feel stuck in. See if you can explore it in a deeper way. Just this simple step can bring a lot more clarity on the situation.

 

Hire a Life Coach

A life coach specializes in helping you to move forward. Oftentimes when we are stuck, we have a blindspot. By definition, we can’t see our blindspot no matter how much work we do, until someone else shows it to us. A life coach is the perfect person to help you pinpoint what is keeping you stuck. You’ll get an outsider’s perspective on what you’re not seeing. A life coach is an expert on finding new ways to move your life forward.

 

Journal

Spend at least 15 minutes journaling about it. Write down: why you feel stuck, what opportunities are available to you to move forward, what hasn’t been working, what new ideas you might try, and so forth. Ask yourself some pointed questions. You might be surprised at what comes up.

 

Meditate

Spend at least 10 minutes really meditating on it. Let the issue you’re feeling stuck on sit in the background of your meditation, while new ideas and new perspectives enter the foreground of your mind. Hold the sense of “stuckness” loosely in your mind (without being attached to it), and become conscious of new ways you might view the situation.

 

Ask People Close to You

Again, when you feel stuck, oftentimes you just need a new perspective or a shift in your thinking. And this can be difficult to do alone. If you can’t afford a life coach, ask your best friend what they think. Talk to your sibling or a family member, see what your closest co-workers think, ask God (if that’s someone you talk to).

 

Do Some Research

Like many things, you can just Google it. Consider how specifically or generally you want to search for whatever it is that you’re feeling stuck on. Maybe you need to find new strategies and new tactics to reach your goals. Maybe you’ll find an article where the author was in a very similar situation, or you might come across a forum discussion about the specific area that you’re feeling stuck in.

 

Brainstorm

Start brainstorming new ways that you can get you what you want. For example, if your goal is to have a very popular blog but you’re struggling to gain traction, start brainstorming some new ways that you can increase your blog’s popularity. Make a list of every idea that comes to mind without judging it, even if it’s the worst idea ever. After your “brain dump”, you can go back and revise your list. Let some fresh ideas come to you.

 

Talk to Your Most Successful Friend or Acquaintance

Ask him or her what they think of your situation and what they would do if they were in it. Be open to feedback and get some input. You might be surprised to hear their view of your position and how they would move forward in it.

 

Try Something New

Einstein defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. The message? Try doing something new, even if it’s small. Getting unstuck is all about taking some baby steps to start moving forward again towards what you want. So take the first step.

 

Where Are You Feeling Stuck in Your Life?

Leave a comment below and let me know.

And I’ll gladly help you out.

 

Tom Casano is the founder of Life Coach Spotter.  Find your true path in life and reach your goals four times faster than you ever would on your own.  Find Your True Path and Reach Your Goals

  • http://www.selfication.com/ Patrik Edblad

    Great advice, Tom. For the most part just making a decision, getting out of our heads and taking action is where the gold is. We tend to heavily overestimate how much a decision really matters and get stuck pondering for way too long.
    If you feel stuck just make your best guess, get moving and correct along the way. Life will pretty much never turn out as expected anyway so it doesn’t matter how you start as long as you get moving.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      I love your point Patrik!

      So you’re saying when we get stuck, it’s because we’re hesitating to make a decision. And if we just make a decision — even if it’s not the perfect one — then we’ll be moving forward and no longer be stuck.

      What if someone’s feeling “stuck” in their life, and their not “going” or getting what they want, not because they’re not making a decision, but because it feels like something’s holding them back?

      • Anon.

        As Og Mandino said:

        “Your only limitations are those you set up in your mind, or permit others to set up for you.”

        I’d suggest there really is no “stuck”. There are only decisions, decisions to act, re-act, or be inactive.

        To blame “stuck” is to not acknowledge one’s response-ability.

        Thus far the only reason I can determine that I choose to be in-active (and feel “stuck”), is fear.

  • youssef djaf

    Precious advice .Hopefully, i hope your adivces will help to go forward . Because i feel that i ‘m stuck and people around me are moving . I firgure out what are my problems .The issue is i’m incapable of making any action,and i get frustrate easily . So i wish that your advices will be great help for me,and makingme take actions and move forward to fullfil my goals .thanks a lot

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      You’re welcome Youssef! :D

      Where do you struggle with taking action? When you say that you are “incapable of taking any action”, what do you mean by that?

      • youssef djaf

        i had a combination of issues startig with self eestem ,self confidence , fear to try new things and mostly the fear to fail ,which i know is normal … when i decide to take action i find myself stuck by obstacles put it by subconcsious …. i try to change that situtations by taking steps even if these are small … but after some times i find my self in the same circle .(sorry for my english i’m not a native speaker ) thanks a lot

        • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

          No prob Youssef. Dude, hit me up with an email or on Facebook. Get in touch with me and we’ll chat! :)

  • http://www.danerickson.net/ Dan Erickson

    I am literally stuck geographically as a single dad with a college teaching job. I can’t move without a court battle. So I spend my time moving other areas of my life forward: writing, blogging, and working on a new relationship.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Dan!

      Wow, interesting situation, to be geographically stuck. That’s really cool that you’re channeling your desire to move geographically into these other areas of your life. I admire that :)

      Just curious, how do you define “moving forward”?

      • http://www.danerickson.net/ Dan Erickson

        To continually increase my love of life, knowledge of the world, and awareness of people and things around me while holding onto my guiding Faith.

        • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

          I love that Dan. Thanks for sharing!

          Wondering if you’d also like to share what are the things that keep you from getting that? :)

          • http://www.danerickson.net/ Dan Erickson

            Nothing. I feel I am on that path daily. But there are those days when I feel I’m not reaching that level. A couple of things that might hold me back on those days would be: reacting instead of acting, wasting time on worthless things like mindless TV and Online entertainment, (but I don’t do that very often). So the first, reacting instead of acting, is the problem to watch the most.

          • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

            And how do you react less and act more? What do you do about that?

          • http://www.danerickson.net/ Dan Erickson

            Perception checking, deep breathing, walking.

          • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

            You’re awesome Dan!

          • iknowyourheart

            Sorry for suddenly interrupt you…Mr. Dan I think you need an adventure in your life… i suggest collect money and go for world tour… Maybe it’s your heart n mind say to…

          • http://www.danerickson.net/ Dan Erickson

            I’d love to go for a world tour, but I have am eight-year old daughter I’m responsible for.

          • Colleen Payne

            I would also like the answer to, “How do you react less and act more”. That would be one of life’s great lessons.

  • http://mesandeep.wordpress.com/ Sandeep Khanal

    I totally agree with the suggestions in the post. Getting out of the thing you are stuck in, isn’t a easy task because generally we get stuck on the mental tasks. And, refreshing yourself from the hard things in our life is hard.
    This article is indeed a pocket full of advice. Loved it! Right now, my life’s going great but if any obstacles comes along the way, I will ask for the help. :)

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Thanks for your kind words Sandeep. That means a lot to me. :) Keep in touch!

      When was a time in your life where you felt stuck?

      • http://mesandeep.wordpress.com/ Sandeep Khanal

        It was few weeks ago. During my final examination of 11th grade. My physics examination was totally screwed. And it felt like, all my hard work went in vain. But, i managed a way out. I let the past go and continued to move on. But, it was hard during that time. Really hard! You know, how we feel when our hard work doesn’t pays off.
        And, once again. Your article and blog is really good. :)

        • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

          Oh yes, I know that feeling Sandeep… It can be a mix of disappointment, sadness, frustration, discouragement, etc.

          Thanks again Sandeep!

          Keep being awesome. :)

  • Mary Slagel@Financial-Lessons

    I have always found that talking to friends and family as well as journaling and inner reflecting have helped me to discover where I feel stuck and how I can move past it.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Thanks for sharing Mary! :)

      What’s most effective about those different ways to discovering where you feel stuck and how to move past it?

      Why do they work so well for you? :)

      • Mary Slagel@Financial-Lessons

        Journaling allows me to block out all the other thoughts that are bombarding my mind and focus solely on one thing. As I write each word, other thoughts come into play that I can pick and choose if they fit or not. Sometimes it is only through this slow process of writing my feelings down one by one can I finally get a clear thought and focus to begin to figure out a plan of action.

        • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

          That sounds very powerful Mary.

          Sometimes when I’m journaling I like to ask myself one laser-focused question to keep myself on track and going for what I’m after. Otherwise I can just ramble on about all kinds of things. ;)

          Interesting how you do it… by only choosing to write the words that fit what you’re looking for. Sounds like we’re doing similar things but in different ways.

          Keep in touch!

          What do you mean by “inner reflecting” by the way? Is that like just contemplating, or meditating, or… something along those lines? :)

          • Mary Slagel@Financial-Lessons

            I guess my journaling could be better explained as more of a process of writing a memoir. I like to reflect on the situation and then try to discover why I feel the way I do or am reacting the way I am based on past experiences in my life. This is the same way I inner reflect. In a way it could be described as meditating but with out focusing so much on breathing and letting everything go. It’s a quiet state of mind where I like to sit and think over my feelings now and how they may be an attest to past experiences as well. It generally happens I am doing something like showering or vacuuming when I have a clear mind to focus.

  • http://www.AchieveTheGreenBeretWay.com/welcome Michael Martel

    Well. when I hear someone say the are stuck, I tend to hear a victim mentality. Stuck tends to come from outside circumstances. I suggest that you go through the very good checklist above you ask yourself “What did I do to create this and what next?”

    Once that step is accomplished, good practical things such as getting outdoors, brisk exercise has a way of changing mindset.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Agreed about the victim mentality… Though I feel that it still happens to the best of us… I was actually feeling stuck when I was writing this article!! Haha..

  • http://www.smartselfdevelopmentplan.com/ Jantje

    Thank you, Tom! I am relating most to doing research when I am really stuck, depends on what topic, though. Sometimes third party info can be greatly complemented by a good advice from a friend. In my opinion.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      You’re welcome Jantje! Thanks for sharing where you sometimes feel stuck. It’s good to hear that talking to a third party helps you. Does that mean only talking to a friend?

      What aspects of talking to a friend help you the most? :)

      • http://www.smartselfdevelopmentplan.com/ Jantje

        Maybe my English wasn’t the best. I meant I try to gather ‘independent’ info from a third party I do not know (online search, forums etc) and then I usually get backup (or not) for the decision I have come up with from a friend. Someone who knows me better. I use this ‘mechanism’ as a confirmation to move on. Very often, it works.

        What aspects of talking? For me it is rather the listening. I voice my situation and then I listen. That friend’s opinion counts.

        Cheers!

  • Emily

    i feel stuck sometimes for words, quite a bit infact. i sometimes feel stuck by the political issues in the workplace and worry that my actions will cause friction even though i am trying to innovate and improve. i talk to friends or seek ideas online and invariably find i do feel a lot clearer after excersize. the worst form of being stuck is by circumstances, but when i think about it, it is only really down to us when it comes to how we choose to feel about them :-)

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Thanks for sharing Emily! I love the last point that you made — when it comes down to it, it’s really how we choose to feel about our circumstances.

      It’s great to hear that exercising helps you feel a lot clearer about things. I’m sorry to hear about the politics in your current office environment.

      Please let me know if there’s anything I can do to help! Don’t be afraid to ask. :)

  • William

    I feel stuck because I moved abroad with my fiance and haven’t really had paid work here beyond teaching a few people English. I left a good university in London one year into my degree to come here for a better life. Things might be a lot cheaper and I have a higher quality of life in other areas than before. Only now I don’t have the dynamic social life I once had and for the past year my doctor put me on medication for my epilepsy which has made me feel like a prisoner within myself and at home.

    My fear is holding me where I am, its held me back in learning the language fast enough. It is holding me back on going after some employment opportunities because I fear that with how poor my CV/Resume is at the moment I won’t gain any position that will actually excite me, and I will only want to quit and feel a failure again. I went to university because I wanted to do a job I enjoy, that uses my brain and skill set. I have been expanding my practical skills since moving here and am almost the perfect home maker right now but that has never been enough for me even if I gain satisfaction out of it. Also my doctor has scared me so much I’m terrified I won’t be able to handle a job and be able to study.

    I feel like I don’t even know anymore that if I got a job to fund university here where I am now at a slower pace, would it even be enough? There is no option that excites me right now. Nothing jumps out as the obvious thing and says “hey this is where you want to be heading”. I’m sleepwalking into marriage and being a home maker so much so that I’m loosing my sense of self. I’m very happy with the relationship just not myself. Sorry.. rather longer post than the others.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey William! Sounds like your life’s not where you truly want it to be right now. It’d be a challenge for me to help you out over these comments.

      Please send me an email. My email address is: “tom AT lifecoachspotter.com”

      Or you can use our contact form here: http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/contact-us/

      Looking forward to getting to know you more William and talking more about where you’d like your life to go.

      Please shoot me an email as I have no way to contact you. :)

  • inarutintheforest

    Thanks for writing this Tom. It helps to have these reminders. I am currently stuck in a business that doesn’t work for me. I had a business partner and together for the past few years we had been slowly moving the business toward opportunities that we found fulfilling while slowly minimizing and/or eliminating the areas of our business that weren’t as fulfilling. Then, in a matter of weeks, we lost our biggest client, my partner abruptly left the business, I had to lay off our staff and the main opportunity for an exciting, new line of business that we were pursuing fell apart. Now, I spend so much time just keeping the existing business afloat that I’ve given up pursuing new lines of business that I find more meaningful. Also, I’m the main breadwinner in my family so I feel like I don’t have room to take risks now.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      I hear what you’re saying. You feel stuck in this existing business which isn’t nearly as meaningful and fulfilling as new lines of business that you’d really like to go into.

      I’d love to chat with you more about. :)

      What’s the best way I can reach you?

      My email address is: “tom AT lifecoachspotter.com”

      Or you can get in touch with me through here: http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/contact-us/

      Talk soon!

      Tom

  • Estella.N.

    i feel stuck with a guy i was in love with. We have decided we can only be friend since he is in love with another girl. Then i made a bad decision to move in to same house with him and become housemate. We are close in all the aspect at life but not emotionally and physically. I want to move on from him and move towards to someone new for a great relationship but couldn’t do it by staying and seeing him everyday.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Estrella!

      I responded but my comment disappeared or was lost.

      What’s the best way I can reach you?

      My email address is: “tom AT lifecoachspotter.com”

      Or you can get in touch with me through here: http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/contact-us/

      Email me asap so we can talk more about it

      Talk soon!

  • nenita8891

    I feel stuck with my ex bf, I broke up with him about ten weeks ago.

    We were together for nine months, during this time I helped him financially, I loaned him money so he could buy a car. I also bought him several hundreds of dollars in clothes, shoes, cologne, etc. Over fifty percent of the time I paid all of our dates. He made me feel that I was being an ‘unnecessary expense.’ I didn’t mind doing all of this for him because I loved him and I was trying to help him. Things started to get shaky after I realized that he took me for granted and made me feel that I was doing all of the work in our relationship. I took the semester off from college in order to save money for us, we had plans to move in together. Once I mentioned to him that I was not doing well financially, he said to me that if I needed to “float” I could my credit cards. (really?) He has a job at a used car dealership, it always seemed that he had no money to pay his expenses. He said that he was broke, that he was helping his mom, stepbrother and his dad(who is homeless and drug addict) ((This I can’t prove, not sure if he was telling me the truth or lying.)

    For our valentines I paid dinner, gave him money for gas, I bought him several gifts.

    What did I received from him? Not even a rose? I was disappointed and sad..

    I want to make clear that Im not a gold digger. I have worked full time since i got out of high school, paid my higher education, (which i am about to complete in a couple of semesters.) and a majority of my expenses (since I still live with my parents)

    We had a good closure a couple weeks ago, we both agreed that we were better off apart, and that our relationship was just a good learning experience.

    I was doing fine, I was moving on, I felt happy…(or at least that is how I felt),

    I was offered a new job at a bank (about twenty miles away from home, & coincidentally about a block away from his apartment, all of this after I submitted over a dozen applications, and ended back close to him once again)…

    Last week we had lunch together, he said that he feels lonely, he misses me and that he wants to have me as part of his life. He said that he wants to keep the doors open. We had several issues, he relied on me financially, this brought me an enormous unnecessary amount of stress to the relationship, causing me to be financially stable as well. I feel that he took me for granted, I was the one who was giving it all in our relationship.

    All of this is making me go nuts. He is my first serious relationship. I feel that I gave everything. I also feel ‘stuck’ and all of this keeps haunting me, I feel that is stopping me from concentrating at work.

    I don’t know what to do. I don’t love him any more, but i still care about his wellbeing.

    I feel like it is out of my control. I feel like I can’t move one, all of him, memories, good and bad moments keep coming back to my mind.

    As I said, i was doing well after we had closure. Now he came back to open old wounds….why?

    I asked him what he was willing to do differently, and he said that he wasn’t sure, that there were so many things. That this idea just popped up….

    I feel confused, stuck in the past,.. I really want to move on. I have a great job, with good chances of succeeding, but i feel that him and all of this stopping me from moving on….I feel stuck.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Nerita, I responded but my reply seems to have disappeared somehow. Anyway, can you friend me on Facebook or email me? Will be easier to get in touch that way. Thanks, Tom

  • Iro Nassopoulos

    Hi there,

    Iro here, going through a separation from a life partner I have loved deeply and have felt loved back, despite problems and shortcomings.

    I relocated from Greece to Germany about 5 1/2 years ago in order to build our lives together as we had fallen in love with each other.

    Back then {and currently now again} we both had our troubles to face:

    -> my bad financial management which had brought me in debts,

    -> his difficulty in proceeding in a loving relation ship and allow it to get established and grow. He was seeking refuge by having affairs parallel to his relation ship.

    He landed in my life at a moment he felt he wanted to stop being this way, or so I understood. I adviced him that no matter what, he should stop lying, cause this way people were getting hurt and that no matter which problems no one deserves that.

    I suggested seeing a partner councelor or to simply proceed with the truth and take it form there.

    In the meantime our on line friendship was growing, flirt was very evident and we were both very attracted to each other from our photos. Soon we were speaking on the phone daily. A month after he flew in to meet each other. After the first days together, we decided we are very lucky to have met each other, said he loved me and wanted to see me again. I felt like having found my long loved life partner, which was somehow lost. He was coming over every 2nd week till my movement was planned and took place, 3 months after our first meeting. He met my parents. We begun our common life in the Penthouse, http://www.flickr.com/photos/ivy_style33/sets/72157621278489894/
    where I also totally unplanned and unexpectedly starting posting pictures of our home and my first blog was born. A whole new world opened before my eyes and I was part of it!

    Now to go back to what make me feel stuck {well in fact I don’t feel stuck, just finding it difficult to adjust to all these changes in just a very short time fraction}

    -> Facing the truth that by having left myself totally dependent on him* both emotionally & financially, I jeopardized both my own growth and the relation ship.

    * according to his saying there was enough money + I should not be worrying about life expenses and food on the table. Just take care of my own self and when I could earn more, provide for our future and add to supporting our present lives, so that we could live, well… even nicer.

    Facing the fact that together with the losing a precious, important other in my life { a lover, a friend, a family member} I’m loosing also:

    -> my current home, the Pearl Birches House http://www.flickr.com/photos/ivy_style33/sets/72157628712378891/
    where I’ve been staying for the past 1 1/2 years {which was bought from him, on his name, still after my choice & complete redesign, using my qualifications in interior design + space organisation + styling}

    -> a home which is also connected with my on line work, as posting pictures of the renovation steps was part of my work {both on my personal blog, but also Ikea Family Live}.

    -> having to move again from a neighborhood I have since about year loved, well adored! and made dear friends at.

    -> not having put money aside, as my own little or bigger earnings where usually spent on our Home & my personal things

    -> currently not having the ability to stand on my own feet, cause I haven’t yet managed to organize myself professionally, so as to ensure a constant money flow from offering my services and being rewarded for that

    -> which point to having to pack the part of our home that is mine and temporarily put it in a garage, while shipping my most needed things back to Greece, my home country, in order to spend some time living with my parents at the place I redesigned for them a couple of years ago, after the crisis. http://www.flickr.com/photos/ivy_style33/sets/72157622506219313/

    -> a way of life I was used to thanks to my life partner, as he infused inside a love for travelling & photography {well the ability to photograph and express myself through that is not lost :), I just ahve to figure out new ways of affording travelling for me}

    -> facing the fact that being 38, I longed to call my life partner ma husband, to be his loving wife and to merge our strengths together in order to create and live a joyous, prosperous life, where there would be space for helping others, less fortunate.

    -> facing the fact, that I’m the only one who can make my dream come true + earning my living through offering my services and being well rewarded for that, living in a beautiful home, where love, joy and creativity prevails, having my own family, travelling the world & selectively sharing some of my experiences in order to motivate and inspire others, too.

    Thank you for reading,

    and for this blog here.

    Kind regards + best of wishes to all who seek for solutions,

    Iro – Ivy Nassopoulos

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Wow Iro! Shoot me an email or friend me on Facebook. Get in touch with me and we’ll chat! :)

      • Iro Nassopoulos

        hi Tom! Thanks for your suggestion. I’m looking forward to hearing you in fact!
        ironassopoulos [at] hotmail.com

  • Iro Nassopoulos

    Hi there,

    Iro here, going through a separation from a life partner I have loved deeply and have felt loved back, despite problems and shortcomings.

    I relocated from Greece to Germany about 5 1/2 years ago in order to build our lives together as we had fallen in love with each other.

    Back then {and currently now again} we both had our troubles to face:

    -> my bad financial management which had brought me in debts,

    -> his difficulty in proceeding in a loving relation ship and allow it to get established and grow. He was seeking refuge by having affairs parallel to his relation ship.

    He landed in my life at a moment he felt he wanted to stop being this way, or so I understood. I adviced him that no matter what, he should stop lying, cause this way people were getting hurt and that no matter which problems no one deserves that. Facing the truth that by having left myself totally dependent on him* both emotionally & financially, I jeopardized both my own growth and the relation ship.

    * according to his saying there was enough money + I should not be worrying about life expenses and food on the table. Just take care of my own self and when I could earn more, provide for our future and add to supporting our present lives, so that we could live, well… even nicer.

    Facing the fact that together with the losing a precious, important other in my life { a lover, a friend, a family member} I’m loosing also:

    -> my current home, the Pearl Birches House http://www.flickr.com/photos/ivy_style33/sets/72157628712378891/
    where I’ve been staying for the past 1 1/2 years {which was bought from him, on his name, still after my choice & complete redesign, using my qualifications in interior design + space organisation + styling}

    -> a home which is also connected with my on line work, as posting pictures of the renovation steps was part of my work {both on my personal blog, but also Ikea Family Live}.

    -> having to move again from a neighborhood I have since about year loved, well adored! and made dear friends at.

    -> not having put money aside, as my own little or bigger earnings where usually spent on our Home & my personal things

    -> currently not having the ability to stand on my own feet, cause I haven’t yet managed to organize myself professionally, so as to ensure a constant money flow from offering my services and being rewarded for that

    -> which point to having to pack the part of our home that is mine and temporarily put it in a garage, while shipping my most needed things back to Greece, my home country, in order to spend some time living with my parents at the place I redesigned for them a couple of years ago, after the crisis. http://www.flickr.com/photos/ivy_style33/sets/72157622506219313/

    -> a way of life I was used to thanks to my life partner, as he infused inside a love for travelling & photography {well the ability to photograph and express myself through that is not lost :), I just ahve to figure out new ways of affording travelling for me}

    -> facing the fact that being 38, I longed to call my life partner ma husband, to be his loving wife and to merge our strengths together in order to create and live a joyous, prosperous life, where there would be space for helping others, less fortunate.

    -> facing the fact, that I’m the only one who can make my dream come true + earning my living through offering my services and being well rewarded for that, living in a beautiful home, where love, joy and creativity prevails, having my own family, travelling the world & selectively sharing some of my experiences in order to motivate and inspire others, too.

    Thank you for reading,

    and for this blog here.

    Kind regards + best of wishes to all who seek for solutions,

    Iro – Ivy Nassopoulos

  • avroopa.thinks

    I am not sure why am I able to share this on a public platform. I love the article, no doubt, but Iv been trying, Or a think I am, to fix my current mindframe. I used to be a very happy person, Im sure of that, and to an outsider, appear like a person who is loving life every moment,. I am not sure how, but lately my personality has been taking a major dip. I cry at the drop of a hat, so easily that its hard to be taken seriously now. I can exchange a limb to fix that. Its draining my of my confidence completely.
    I am so lucky to have a wonderful family and a difficult long distance but a strong and happy relationship. But im stuck, mostly career wise, because I cant seem to be taking any direction. I try to take each project as a learning experience, but I don’t think im able to take the next step professionally. Just when I think that I am going to pursue something to the best of my abilities, it takes a bad turn. Because where and how I decide to work will affect my relationship, which further will change things with my family, since its all far apart. So its almost at a point where im choosing between these important things in life. I don’t think I can keep everyone happy, which I know shouldn’t be the point, but this increasingly sensitive and a paranoid state of mind is not accepting that. I just want to be able to find myself a direction, be good at what Im doing, hope that all my loved ones are happy and proud of me, but I seem to failing at that since a while now. Its really pushing me further into dark place where I don’t want to go, because I know I don’t belong there. But I don’t know how to steer in the other direction. I really looking for something good to happen, anything even small, to get a little bit of my confidence in my decisions back.
    Its sounds like a cliched sob story, but I am realizing that its not easy living it.

    • Iro Nassopoulos

      just breathe in all gratitude that you can feel for all blessings in your life, like your wonderful family.

      start paying attention to the little things that bring you joy

      when you feel you are falling into darkness, allow it for just a little while, feeling it as warmth, knowing the every night evolved into a day full of light.

      accept the dark part of yourself as a sign that there is a little voice inside you that speaks to you and has been left unheard… it is a chance to grow, a chance to heal, a chance to reach to deeper happiness.

      allow yourself to know that the road will get easier as you proceed… like someone who begins to jog, in some day further ahead, you’ll see that you’ll be able to run on roads that you thought you could only walk before, you’ll see that you can run while keeping your breath and feeling fit, when in fact you could have never imagined that you could do anything than just walk there.

      And then you’ll see you have the choice of which roads to follow, which paths to take, where you feel like slowing down, when your feel it’s proper to find strength in being fast & powerful.

      Whatever it is you can make it happen.

      • avroopa.thinks

        Thank you Iro. Kind and encouraging words from a stranger are very powerful. It makes you feel that there are people who can understand and empathise even without knowing you and that you are not alone. I can see that you are going through a tough time yourself, and I hope that you will get through it. In fact judging from what you told me, yoy definitely will, you know the path. All the best to you, and thanks for this, means a lot.

        • Iro Nassopoulos

          Really heartwarming reading this, so great that you replied :) t
          Thank you also for your kindest words and wonderful wishes. I still don’t know how, but I’ll get through this, till walking on my path is again joyous, simple, giving & rewarding.
          All the very best for you, too.
          Looking forward to the day we hear from each other, while both feeling relieved and being in a nice flow with our lives.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Avroopa!

      Friend me on Facebook or email me so that we can chat.

      Looking forward to getting to know you better. :)

      Tom

      • avroopa.thinks

        Looking forward to it Iro. Im sure that time will come:)

        Thank you Tom, looking forward to talk soon. :)

    • travel-soul

      Avroopa, just reading about your situation, it feels like I am reading about my own situation at the moment. Except that additionally, I have health issue at the moment and feel that my relationship is not quite right. I do understand how you’re feeling. It’s just amazing how reading some comments randomly, you may find your own life reflected in somebody else’s. I’m trying to think positive so I can get better and find ways of picking myself up and get into action to move forward. I sincerely hope you sort things out and my best wishes for you.

    • Colleen Payne

      The main thing to do is to love yourself first, and be absent of any negative judgements of yourself and others. Go with the flow of life. Dream BIG!!

  • marwa

    i want to make something good and useful but i can not achieve anything till now

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Marwa! Would love to know more :)

  • Dave

    This is good stuff, but there is stuck, and the there is STUCK. I’m stuck on being stuck. When I try to pinpoint where I’m stuck, I find multiple sticking points. When you realize you’re stuck in so many areas, it is overwhelming to even begin to consider how to tackle them. Hiring a life coach is out of the question due to budget constraints, journaling and meditation are things I’m already stuck on. I lack close friends particularly successful ones, so who to talk to?

    What I could really use is an article on how to self-motivate, how to make a drastic change, and how to stake your claim on a whole new life.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Friend me on Facebook or hit me up Dave. I’m actually about to submit an article on several ways to get motivated. :)

  • Ericson Ay Mires

    Journaling has been a core part of my lifestyle these past few months. It’s served as a great method to keep me moving forward, preventing any stagnation on my part.

    It works because I can work out what exactly is holding me back in life and how I can overcome it. In interesting way to handle the problem-solution method of fixing things.

    It’s like you’re having a dialogue with yourself, and both of you want the best for yourself. I highly recommend its use as well.

    Great post!

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Thanks Ericson, and thanks for sharing. :) Keep in touch!

  • Jaime

    Hi Tom I been feeling stuck for years on not being able to be social my email is shakp559@ymail.com I would like ur help. Thanks

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Jaime, just sent you an email :)

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Is the email address you wrote correct?

      The email I sent bounced back..

  • http://www.consciousnessjunkie.com/ CJ

    Regarding the meditation, I have found it very valuable to FEEL into the stuckness itself — meaning feel it fully and directly as a feeling itself, without getting into mental analysis of it. This often brings a type of clarity to it as opposed to spinning the wheels. Thanks for sharing.

  • babycakesAST

    I think i’m stuck mentally, I was not exposed to career or goal achievement opportunities as a kid and teenager now i’m almost 25yrs and I don’t know what is it I want to become, I don’t have a goal, I’m now working on a plan but i’m not even sure if that’s what i really want to do. I’m stuck…

  • nero_s

    Thanks for the starting steps.

    I am long stuck in career planning, for 6 years now. Going through the insanity phase defined by Einstein, trying a new thing each time but i end up in the same spot.

    It all arises because i am very creative (and not necessarily as intelligent). I am much smarter than my job requires me to be; that makes me not respect my job as much as i should and that also makes my bosses think i am not “aligned” and further reduces my growth at my current job in the way i aspire.

    So i have been trying to re-enter academics with a view of discovering the “aha” moments again and do something creative. Every year i got admissions into some really good schools in my field of interest and i ended up not taking up the admissions and remaining in my same old state. Sometimes my reason was not enough funds for education, but most recently my reason was that academics and industry are quite disconnected in my field (tech) and upon graduation, one has to fight hard in order to get a job.

    After 6 years of trying, i have the right academic opportunities at my doorstep but i do not have the energy nor the guts to take those up. At the same time, my inner desire to work on the latest/futuristic things in tech has only increased all the more, driving me into a state where there is only one issue in my mind, doing a lot of chatter with me — what should i do next?

    I’m one of those guys who can do wonders at Google if Google ever hires me (as i am highly creative and have tech skills, and some of my thoughts/vision are the same as what is done at Google. Recently, i created a realtime road-traffic tracking application only to learn later that Google has it in place already). However, given the fact that i am not intelligent to solve those tricky puzzles in the way Google wants me to, and in the limited time they give, i do not stand a chance of being hired by Google.

    Sometimes i feel my creativity is the reason of all this problem and the world has no space for creative people as creativity cannot be measured yet.

    Is there a way out?

  • Debbi

    I’m stuck in an abusive relationship. The house is in my husband’s and my father co-signed the loan. I have two kids and I work part-time and cannot afford to be on my own. I know I have to get out and the drama is horrible and I want the drama gone.

  • QNN

    it’s very useful for me right now, many thanks. At this moment I am facing with some problems at University and it seems that I cant overcome. I am really in need of help!

  • Donna

    I’m 40 years old and been in the same career for 20 years. I’ve been fired from my last three jobs (well one was laid off) but the point being this is clearly not the right career path for me in upper management. I have no other passions or skills to pursue. I’m totally stuck. I don’t even know where to start. A teacher, a nurse, a vet, a real estate salesman. I am so overwhelmed. Where do I begin?

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Donna! Friend me on facebook and we’ll chat :) “Tom Casano”

  • Tamara C

    I feel like my life has been on hold for the past 3 years. I am stuck in this very dark place and can’t seem to find myself and my new normal. My father died 2 years ago due to cancer. He lived with me at the end so I could help him. At the same time my husband of 20 yrs had been hurt in a freak accident and was in and out of the hospital for 18 months. He died 4 months after my father. Since they died, I have been plagued with one illness after another. I fell and broke my wrist, pneumonia, 2 hospital stays and 7 ER visits for a migraine that wouldn’t go away, Cervical cancer. I spent Thanksgiving an Christmas in the hospital for a rare heart condition and had to have a pacemaker put in. I just seems like it is one thing after another. I kind of had a meltdown in January and had to be hospitalized in a mental hospital. I have been in two different ones since then. I haven’t worked since Thanksgiving. I have been at my job for 17 years. I am looking to loose it if I don’t “pull it together .”
    I have tried to kill myself on 3 different occasions because I just don’t see a future. A life worth living. I feel like I am just existing. My identity was tied a lot to being married and my husband. I know not the best way but none the less I don’t know who I am or my new normal. I know my life can’t be the same but it has been a struggle trying to pull out of this. I want a life worth living but I just can’t figure it out.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Tamara. Wow you’ve been through a lot. I’d love to be able to help you, but it sounds like a therapist would be better suited to help you.

      Have you seen one or thought about seeing one? :)

  • Guddee

    I have been in a 4 year relationship which turned long distance relationship 2 years ago due to circumstances beyond our control. We have a child together and I care very much for this man. We are not able to build a life together at this time. We have tried and tried to make this work but it has become emotionally and financially draining. I feel tied to this man not just through our child but also because I felt he was truly my soul mate. It is very hard to let go although that seems to be the most obvious solution to everyone around me. Honestly, I am not afraid to be alone. I actually enjoy my independence, I work full-time, and am a responsible and loving single mother. But I still feel stuck because of my tie to this individual. I want to be able to build a better life and future but I feel so stuck in these present circumstances – I feel like so many people are depending on me – including him and I don’t want to be the “hero” – I want everyone to be happy – but I also realize that I need to identify my own happiness if I am going to get unstuck from this situation. I’m tired of feeling stuck and overwhelmed. I want to take the next step towards some kind of improvement for my life – but I’m not sure how to go about it. What is that “first step” to take and how can I conquer any fear that might hold me back from taking that first step?

  • Tam

    I am feeling stuck as well. I graduated from college 3 years ago and I still haven’t made my “breakthrough”. I have been working for a small company that has been in danger of going under for the past 2 years, in a position that I absolutely loathe. No matter how many positions I apply to, I never receive a call back for an interview. On top of career issues, I have began experiencing relationship issues after learning that my boyfriend had been unfaithful after nearly 2 years into our relationship. I am also really close with my family, but I have reached the point where I feel that they are also limiting my growth because they would rather push their opinions onto me instead of letting me live and make mistakes on my own. I just do not know how to break away to live my life where I am satisfied within myself, regardless of how someone else feels.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Tam! Friend me on Facebook and we’ll go from there :)

  • Dave

    I really want to run my own courier business but i have failed in running my own business twice before so i am stuck on knowing what to do for the best.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Dave, I’d love to help you! Please friend me on Facebook and we can talk from there :)

  • Ayo

    I have been stucked in my business for some time now. I can not make a living for my self. I am also stucked in my social life because of my bad experience and my present situation

  • Rida Khan

    i love u guys!

  • henrylozano

    Henry
    I’m feeling stuck because I’m not doing as much as I can. I have a journal I just suffer from lack of self discipline.
    its like even though I know how important the 9 ways to move my life forword could help me its like after I read things that could help me to live a better life
    I don’t do it or I only do it for a few days. I even hired a life coach a few years back and I didn’t stay consistent with that.
    The other thing I feel stuck with is I have a one year old lil girl that I get to be responsible for and I try to forgive her mom. my ex girlfriend. and just right now as I wrote the last sentence I unstuck my self lol writing helps I’m glad you said leave a comment below.

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hey Henry! Friend me on Facebook and we can get in touch :)

  • Jerry

    Hi everyone,
    I’m having trouble trying to figure out were all I’m stuck at I know I’m stuck in the relationship area just ended a 11 year relationship and she still lives with me cause she has nowhere else to go and I can’t make her sleep outside but now she refuses to let me go and refuses to acknowledge that we are threw and plays it off as a joke that she broke up with me. I don’t want to be with her and she won’t accept that I’m afraid to try and be forceful about her leaving cause she has talked about hurting herself before. But all that drama aside in life in general thou I can not figure out what’s wrong but I just feel lost and don’t really have any idea why and don’t see what the problem is I have a decent job that I like. I do live kinda a hermits life I don’t socialize with very many people probly 20 people and all but 6 of them are family the others are employees were I work but I feel like I’m happier to be alone t

    • http://www.lifecoachspotter.com/ Tom Casano -Life Coach Spotter

      Hi Jerry, friend me on Facebook and we can get in touch :)

  • Bruce

    Bruce here. Came across your blog. Feeling stuck and without direction. Have an invention I made yet fear keeps me from moving forward. I HAVE TO CHANGE….also I have a desire to go back to grad school in Spiritual Psychology. I got lost along the way and I want to grow in an upward spiral to feel more joy, happiness and love. I remember feeling this so long ago prior to my drug addiction years…sober 15 now…I have had a Near Death Experience and so I know the love that exists and is all around us….I want to find that in myself….to be a Light in the world…..how do I get started…..my depression is telling me not to do things and my friends are saying take contrary action…I am tired of living in fear…..I have tried many medications and none work…plus I don’t believe in them. I am being treated by a MD/Naturopath/ Acupuncturist to make sure I have all the proper nutrients to support my system naturally and build it up again. My main thing is feeling alone all the time and having low esteem and confidence……I know that nothing in the external work will bring one happiness unless one is serving….I am a server in a restaurant yet it is not what my soul wants……..I yearn to feel more alive and explore the world and know that it is OK to do so……I also want to feel whole and complete……I am ranting here…. I want to know who Bruce is and find my inner power and strength instead if feeling like a victim in life by just taking each day as it comes…..my other desire is to know God and to know he loves me and to hear his voice and trust and have faith again….I know my thoughts and perceptions create my reality and I need to know where and how to start…..I desire to love and be cheerful again and to feel alive again…that’s it…any stepping stones would help……I want to love life again like I used to…..thank you for listening…..

  • Diana

    After quiting my corporate job & following an artistic career I have moved to another country just packing my suitcase and starying all over. After 3 years of struggle, but in a good way, after finally getting my roots here, I feel stuck again & bored mainly because of the life where I live. Most likely because of the cultural differences.
    Due to my job I also travel a lot which makes me very happy & I have lots of new friends ( well more like I know a lot of people ) all over the world. But when I am home & my work here I really started lately to feel really bored, unusefull, demotivated and well stuck and feel like I need a new challenge.

  • Yvonne

    I am completely stuck. In my job with a difficult supervisor and because of my age I’m almost 60 I find it difficult to find other work. I’m lost and need to find a way to move forward but feel completely overwhelmed!
    In past I have always been positive and upbeat just don’t know how I got here!

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  • Sara

    Im stuck in my relationship, and as much as i try get away from unsolved problems, they always come back to find me, solving them isnt easy, and iv lost much of the patience i have, i found speaking to god does help as you cant always rely on friends, i seem to hold on to things that may not mean much to my partner, and i no by doing that may make the problem worse, but im stuck with trying to always fix things, and trying to always keep things right. i dont know how to take that step back

  • Cat

    I feel stuck with my life because I feel I am not accomplishing enough, and I am slowly moving forward. I am not working or going to school because I want to work on my novel, write music, etc, but I am not feeling motivated to do any of that.

    I feel like I have been going in circles, because even if I do get a job or take some classes, I do not feel motivated to do those either.

    I fear I am stuck in this circle and I will never get where I want to be.

  • B.Brian Freel

    I feel stuck in life. Nothing is moving forward at all. I am 28 I want to move out of my parents house and make life start happening for me. I wrote a book. I managed to self publish it, but that was over 3 years ago. I haven’t really been able to get any other success with the novel, besides publishing it online but without the word getting out or people knowing who I am, their won’t be a lot of buyers. I am currently writing a second novel, but living with my parents and having my brother move back in, then my aunt move in with us. It a lot of times gets hard to find time to write where I lose the flow of what is happening in the story I somewhat have to start all over, after 27 chapter and 307 pages. After starting over so many times I somewhat lost the motivation, but I do feel the urge to write which has me continue. I try enter short stories, but usually I have to wait 10 months before I even know if I win or not, and so far haven’t won. So waiting all that time to find out I didn’t win, really discourages a person. I want to try and get a literary agent, but I need to write a book proposal. I sent what I had to an editor who helped with the book proposal but said it still wasn’t good enough to find a publisher. Best thing to do is try to work on my novel myself without finding a publisher. I will be spending more money for it, and most likely won’t find a publisher. Which is exactly what has been happening. I’m on disability, and I only need the medication, but I can’t pick just one they supply the medication plus govenrment money. Which I’m thankful for, but I feel someone else may need that money more then I do. I just need the medication. One of the downsides of being on disability you are only able to work 25 hours. I work as a delivery driver for this pizza place, but my work only has me working 15-18 hours. I am thankful for the job, but whith that amount of hours, I am unable to make enough to be able to at least affored a place of my own, which will make me feel I at least took one small step forward in life. I’m trying to find another job, one that will pay better and will give me a bit more hours, at least the hours I’m able to work due to disability, and I’ve been applying. So far I applyed to 8,9 jobs, and haven’t heard nothing yet. The money I do get from the government most of it goes to student loans I am paying off from college, which I wasn’t able to get the degree. The only reason I went into college was because people were pressuring me into going and I was young, and didn’t realize I had a choice if I wanted to go, and now I’m paying the loans off I feel very stuck.

  • Courtney

    Right now for myself, I am feeling like I am stuck in my professional life. I have been out of collage now for almost a year and I am feeling stuck in my life.I had been in a relationship with a man who challenged me and always supported me and who I truly loved for about almost 2 years. We were physically near each other for the most part of our relationship but after August I finished college and instead of going back home and I moved to another city, thus entering into a long distance relationship ( 3 hours away) while he was still in school ( he’s 21, I’m 23) . I was very much happy with him although we couldn’t see each other as much as we wanted, we still made our relationship work. But in recent months, I had 2 job opportunities that didn’t end up working out and I was depressed from that and let that depression seep into my relationship with the man I loved and still love. He let me know that he doesn’t want to lose me, but I recognize that how I am right now, would just further damage us. We decided to focus on ourselves for the moment and maybe that would change things. I unfriend him from all social media and deleted his number and deleted the photos we had together because I know if I see those things, it’s just going to harm me and I won’t be focusing on myself. We both still very much love each other and I truly believe that he is my soulmate but how I am right now would just drive us apart. All this happened 3 days ago and truthfully, I’m still hoping that this is a nightmare that I don’t have him to call my own right now, but I know that I need to work on myself, getting myself where I need to go. It still very much hurts because in this time , there was no promise that we would get back together but I believe if we are meant to be together, then it will happen but I need to work on myself FIRST.
    And it begins with figuring out what I want in my life, right now I am trying to just to not focus that I’ve separated from him and focus more on me and I know he’s doing the same. I told myself that I wouldn’t contact him for at least 60 days and today is day 2. I just have to figure out what I want from MY life and God has our paths cross again, then it will just be the icing on top. And I been praying to job and really trying to think am what it is Courtney wants, plus I’m working out again, getting a tattoo , getting a new hairstyle, just trying to take care of myself and trying to change my thinking so my inside will match my outside.
    I guess I just really needed to get this out and focus on getting myself UNSTUCK because the most important relationship that I’ll have is with myself and I’m going to work on that.

    Thank you for reading and if there’s any advice that you could give, I would appreciate it but if not, then thank you for reading this.