Comments on: Why It’s Not Selfish to Put Yourself First http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/ Thu, 18 Mar 2010 22:57:30 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Being a Good Steward: Its About More Than Money | My Super-Charged Life http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-79754 Being a Good Steward: Its About More Than Money | My Super-Charged Life Mon, 15 Mar 2010 12:00:32 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-79754 [...] Hale wrote an article for Pick The Brain called Why It’s Not Selfish to Put Yourself First, where she suggests that acting in our own best interests involves four [...] [...] Hale wrote an article for Pick The Brain called Why It’s Not Selfish to Put Yourself First, where she suggests that acting in our own best interests involves four [...]

]]> By: Festive Link Love Carnivality #30 | Free From Broke http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68873 Festive Link Love Carnivality #30 | Free From Broke Sun, 26 Oct 2008 12:42:59 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68873 [...] It’s not selfish to put yourself first! [...] [...] It’s not selfish to put yourself first! [...]

]]> By: Candace http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68582 Candace Fri, 17 Oct 2008 02:02:44 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68582 Great post. Great post.

]]> By: Craig http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68538 Craig Thu, 16 Oct 2008 07:07:29 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68538 Just a small correction, selfishness is NOT moral - it is however ETHICAL. morality is a behavioral modifier of religions and socialists. Ethics, guide the self-aware and self-determend. The distinction is worth thinking about. All the best on your life journey. $. Just a small correction, selfishness is NOT moral – it is however ETHICAL. morality is a behavioral modifier of religions and socialists. Ethics, guide the self-aware and self-determend. The distinction is worth thinking about. All the best on your life journey. $.

]]> By: Eileen http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68478 Eileen Tue, 14 Oct 2008 23:46:26 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68478 I've always liked being selfish, and I certainly don't have a problem putting myself first! I’ve always liked being selfish, and I certainly don’t have a problem putting myself first!

]]> By: Juliet http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68426 Juliet Mon, 13 Oct 2008 17:07:29 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68426 Hi Igor Apologies if this is a repeat, but my PC crashed ;) In terms of keeping with good-selfish versus bad-selfish, I think that it is important to: 1. know oneself 2. be aware of your goals and what you want to achieve 3. assess the situation If you keep your behaviour and actions in line with what you want to achieve, then you'll keep on your path. If this is a selfish path from the start, then, so be it. For example, I am a person who needs a fair amount of personal space (I know myself). My friends are important to me (I want to maintain, improve, grow these friendships). To achieve the latter, I need to spend time with my friends. However, given the former, I know that, if I am in need of space, time with friends will not be quality time. I won't be able to give as much as I would like and it will drain me even further. If I am in this in-need-of-space frame of mind, I don't think that it is bad-selfish to decline an invitation. I want to be able to give of my best to these relationships. That said, I will always muster the energy if a friend is in need. So, for me, it's self-awareness, purpose and assessment of the situation. Juliet Hi Igor

Apologies if this is a repeat, but my PC crashed ;)

In terms of keeping with good-selfish versus bad-selfish, I think that it is important to:
1. know oneself
2. be aware of your goals and what you want to achieve
3. assess the situation

If you keep your behaviour and actions in line with what you want to achieve, then you’ll keep on your path. If this is a selfish path from the start, then, so be it.

For example, I am a person who needs a fair amount of personal space (I know myself).
My friends are important to me (I want to maintain, improve, grow these friendships).

To achieve the latter, I need to spend time with my friends. However, given the former, I know that, if I am in need of space, time with friends will not be quality time. I won’t be able to give as much as I would like and it will drain me even further. If I am in this in-need-of-space frame of mind, I don’t think that it is bad-selfish to decline an invitation. I want to be able to give of my best to these relationships. That said, I will always muster the energy if a friend is in need.

So, for me, it’s self-awareness, purpose and assessment of the situation.

Juliet

]]> By: catherine http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68403 catherine Sun, 12 Oct 2008 13:36:57 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68403 Actually it is selfish to put yourself first. And it is moral. Ayn Rand was the first to prove it, philosophically. Her philosophy is called Objectivism. I'll just add a quote from her here in case that interests you. " At a sales conference at Random House, preceding the publication of Atlas Shrugged, one of the book salesmen asked me whether I could present the essence of my philosophy while standing on one foot. I did as follows: 1. Metaphysics: Objective Reality 2. Epistemology: Reason 3. Ethics: Self-interest 4. Politics: Capitalism If you want this translated into simple language, it would read: 1. “Nature, to be commanded, must be obeyed” or “Wishing won’t make it so.” 2. “You can’t eat your cake and have it, too.” 3. “Man is an end in himself.” 4. “Give me liberty or give me death.” If you held these concepts with total consistency, as the base of your convictions, you would have a full philosophical system to guide the course of your life. " Actually it is selfish to put yourself first. And it is moral. Ayn Rand was the first to prove it, philosophically. Her philosophy is called Objectivism.

I’ll just add a quote from her here in case that interests you.

”
At a sales conference at Random House, preceding the publication of Atlas Shrugged, one of the book salesmen asked me whether I could present the essence of my philosophy while standing on one foot. I did as follows:

1. Metaphysics: Objective Reality
2. Epistemology: Reason
3. Ethics: Self-interest
4. Politics: Capitalism

If you want this translated into simple language, it would read: 1. “Nature, to be commanded, must be obeyed” or “Wishing won’t make it so.” 2. “You can’t eat your cake and have it, too.” 3. “Man is an end in himself.” 4. “Give me liberty or give me death.”

If you held these concepts with total consistency, as the base of your convictions, you would have a full philosophical system to guide the course of your life.
“

]]> By: igor http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68383 igor Sat, 11 Oct 2008 14:06:50 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68383 An important topic and some helpful remarks. But let's not pretend selfishness doesn't exist. A lot of current new-agey self-affirmation fashion does actually make people selfish, in my view. The question I'd like to be able to better answer is: how to distinguish between healthy self-nurturing (good) and selfishness (bad). There may be a grey area in the middle, I'm afraid. An important topic and some helpful remarks.
But let’s not pretend selfishness doesn’t exist.
A lot of current new-agey self-affirmation fashion does actually make people selfish, in my view.
The question I’d like to be able to better answer is: how to distinguish between healthy self-nurturing (good) and selfishness (bad). There may be a grey area in the middle, I’m afraid.

]]> By: Links For Super-Charged Living - October 11, 2008 | My Super-Charged Life http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68382 Links For Super-Charged Living - October 11, 2008 | My Super-Charged Life Sat, 11 Oct 2008 13:01:16 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68382 [...] Leadership by Example           When You Come To A Fork In The RoadWhy It’s Not Selfish to Put Yourself First [...] [...] Leadership by Example           When You Come To A Fork In The RoadWhy It’s Not Selfish to Put Yourself First [...]

]]> By: Harmony http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/comment-page-1/#comment-68301 Harmony Fri, 10 Oct 2008 06:15:24 +0000 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/put-yourself-first/#comment-68301 Thanks for this healthy post! The thing is, if we don't monitor ourselves and nuture US we then expect others to do it for us. And that = TROUBLE. :-) Thanks for this healthy post! The thing is, if we don’t monitor ourselves and nuture US we then expect others to do it for us. And that = TROUBLE. :-)

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