Ever wonder why it seems your dog is in a good mood all the waking hours of the day?  Perhaps adopting a dog’s sleep habits might help you emulate the feeling.

A bad night’s sleep is the worst when it comes to getting things accomplished and feeling good during what should be a great day.  The effects due to lack of sleep on mood, productivity, creativity, and even the quality of our relationships take a bigger toll on our health than most realize.

Anyone who does have trouble sleeping most likely have read all the “regular” things to do in order to get better sleep.  The concept becomes nothing more than a repeated set of rules that get ignored, similar to the simple rules of training a well behaved dog.

Finding a new outlook and different perspective is the answer to changing any sort of habit you’ve developed.  Sleep is no different.  That being the case here are some ideas that may just be on the level of an “ah-ha moment” and getting some quality sleep along the way.

Sleep Like a Dog

Dogs may not have the same stress and anxiety as we do, but they do have certain routines you can practice that prepare you for a great night’s sleep.

Eat Several Hours Before Going To Bed

Following this rule of the paw is much easier when you are dog, generally because dogs get fed only twice a day and they have no other choice.  Getting up off the couch and wandering over to the fridge to aimlessly snack isn’t an option.  Maybe eating like a dog is in order for better health!  Eat at meal times and don’t snack just before going to bed.

Don’t Drink Alcohol

The beverage of choice for a dog is water, again, simply because it is the only thing available.  Taking alcohol out of the picture would most likely find large numbers of people wagging more.  Not such a bad idea, yet we still willingly tip those unwanted calories with bad side effects regularly.  If you have trouble sleeping this may be one to give a serious try.

Reduce the Bright Light of the Computer Screen

Computers, Blackberries, iPhones, the television… we live in a digital age and much of our entertainment comes from our computer screen.  If we aren’t working on them, we are playing on Twitter or Facebook, “chatting” with a friend or catching up on a bit of work before going to sleep.  It is almost a ridiculous thought to make it a rule to limit screen time before bed these days.  If it is an impossibility for you, try dimming the screen, creating a low light effect to enhance preparation for sleep.

Take a Power Nap in a Sunny Spot

Ever notice how your dog will find the spot in the house where the sun is shining through the window creating a nice cozy warm sleeping zone?  Sleep is sleep is sleep and especially if you are lacking enough sleep at night by all means go for the power nap during the day.  Find a cozy warm spot, curl up, catch a few refreshing zz’s just like your dog, and go back to a productive day.

Get Out and Exercise

Most exercise should be done in the morning or afternoon.  Don’t get your heart racing just before you plan on shutting it all down for sleep.  Dogs love the chance to run around and stretch it out first thing in the morning, regardless of the weather, time of year, or lack of coffee.  Head out the door with your dog first thing in the morning to set your day off to a better start.  Numerous studies conclude exercise induces good sleep habits.

Get Enough Sunlight

Dogs typically don’t understand the odd hours we humans have started keeping.  Staying up later and later into the night is becoming normal.  Before we had such great late night television shows available people went to sleep closer to sunset and awoke at sunrise.

Dogs seems to maintain this routine better than people now days.  It may have something to do with the fact that dogs usually get the appropriate amount of sunlight.  There is a real advantage to having to go outside to go to the bathroom!  On any account, getting sunlight every day can help with your sleep cycles so make sure to get outside and soak up some real daylight.

A Comfortable Bed

Dogs sleep in many positions.  Most dogs have a little ritual before laying down.  Fluff up the bed, turn around three times and curl up in a nice warm little ball.  Once in a deep sleep you’ll see dogs roll over on their back completely stretched out.  Comfortable.  Asleep.  Set your sleeping space up so it is comfortable and dark, with room to curl up and stretch out in your best slumbering moments.

Think of it as your den.  Take the time to slow down and get away from the computer, the phone, TV and the hustle bustle of the world.  Take a rest in your own comfy den and come out refreshed and ready to wag.

Jt Clough is a professional dog trainer and writes at  www.DogTrainingSanDiego.com Creating a balanced life with calm dog training techniques through her long time commitment to health and fitness, Clough a finisher of 9 Ironmans, and creator of dog running programs inspires people by introducing playtime in life through the eyes of a dog.

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3 Roadblocks To Success

The Path To Success

"Glitch" courtesy of Luiza O.S @Flickr

Chances are you've got success on the brain if you're reading this article.  You've set your goals, you're on your way to achieving your dreams.  But they're not coming as fast as you would like.  You're ready for it to all come true right now.  You set a deadline to reach your goal, but it just didn't happen in that timeframe.  And now you feel a little deflated.  Maybe you've even allowed a little doubt to creep in, as you're not sure when (or if) it will ever happen.

You know what a missed deadline tells you?
It's just a feedback mechanism to tell you that your plans and execution of them weren't correct for the timeline you set.  You're not a failure.  You've just produced a result.  It may not be the result you wanted, but don't fret, because sometimes our greatest lessons come from when we get what we didn't want.  Maybe the deadline was too tight.  Maybe your plans weren't sound.

You're not the only one to not reach a goal or hit a bump in the road.
Michael Jordan didn't make his high school basketball team.  Famous author J.K. Rowling was living on welfare when she wrote the first Harry Potter book, the start of a series that went on to make her spectacularly rich.

So what do the champions do during the process of making their dreams come true?

1. Grin and bear it.  You probably didn't want to hear this.  You want to hear me say "you can have it all right now."  Sorry, good self help isn't like a fast food restaurant slogan.  Sometimes there will be times when your energy levels are off or something else happens in your life forcing you to put your dreams on hold for a just a bit.  It's for those challenging times that you have to do your best and tackle all the challenges in front of you.  Yes, you'll have failures along the way but when Michael Jordan he bore the rejection by practicing even more.
2. Take a time-out. You're saying, "what do you mean relax?  How can I relax when I've done everything I can and my dreams still aren't coming true."  Remember, throughout history, the great men and women who changed our world have found their greatest ideas when they were away from their usual routines.  For instance, when he was a teenager, Albert Einstein spent some time in Italy with his parents enjoying the beauty of Italy's Apennine mountains.  It was during this time he contemplated what would happen if a ray of light became imprisoned.  This idea was to be the foundation of his life's work.  So relax.  You never when the idea you need to bridge the gap between your current reality and your dreams will be found.  But sometimes you need to give yourself the space to find it.
3. Assess whether your current plans are realistic. If you've got 4 kids, a full-time job, and a mortgage, it may be hard to start your own business on the side and have it succeed within a month.  Maybe your dreams aren't coming true by the deadlines you set because your deadlines were unrealistic to begin with.   So make new plans and get underway!
4. Get support. If you're starting your own business, is there someone you know who's been down this road who can give you some advice?  Or, if you're trying to fix your life in some way – overcoming an addiction, healing from a painful past, or getting over an ex-lover – maybe you should consider getting a therapist.  Often times, having a sounding board and a supportive ear can make us feel better and even more motivated to recommit to achieving our goals.
5. Play a game called "15 Ways…" This is a little game I like to play whenever I get stuck on how to break through barriers in achieving goals.  Grab a sheet of paper and brainstorm 15 ways you can overcome whatever obstacle is standing in between you and your goals.  For instance, if you feel it's a lack of time, then brainstorm 15 ways you can create more time in your life.  I like using the number fifteen because I find the first five are usually pretty obvious, but the next 10 are usually a bit harder to come up with.  These are where the novel solutions you didn't think about usually reveal themselves.
6. Pick a hero.  Who in your mind is a noteworthy person you would like to emulate in life?  Are they extremely motivated?  Did they overcome tremendous odds to get where they are today?  Tack a picture of them on your wall.  Everytime you feel like it's too hard or you just can't do it, learn to ask yourself what your hero would do.  Now go do it.
7. Go out and execute every day. If you're done with your time out, then commit to doing one thing for your dreams everyday, no matter how small it is.  Taking action keeps you motivated and gives you momentum in achieving your goals.  Well-worn clichés like "genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration" still hold water today.

A missed deadline is just a chance for growth.  And it makes for a great story about how you overcame obstacles along the way. Every success story has them.  So why shouldn't you?

Are you a child abuse survivor wondering why you're unhappy?  Then get this free report, Why Are You Unhappy? (How To Create Happiness Through Friendship If You're An Abuse Survivor), written especially for child abuse survivors trying to create happiness in their lives.

Adam Appleson is the founder of ZenTactics, a website that helps abuse survivors develop practical personal development skills with articles like One of the Best Free Natural Remedies for Depression That You Can Do In 10 Minutes Or Less. ]]> http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/how-to-use-failure-to-trigger-success/feed/ 8 http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/5-keys-to-successful-living/ http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/5-keys-to-successful-living/#comments Wed, 10 Mar 2010 08:00:50 +0000 Mr.SelfDevelopment http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/?p=1866

“The Good Life” courtesy of Architects 51N4E

Today I want to talk about five keys that will help you live a successful life.  These are five keys that I’ve learned over the years from studying successful people.  These lessons separate those who succeed from those who fail.

We’re all capable of greatness; however, we’re all not willing to reach for it.  This article contains some of the keys that will help you reach for greatness.  If you follow these keys, I believe your life will begin to change.

5 Keys to Successful Living:

1. Discover why you were created

Everything created solves a problem, my eyes see, my ears hear, my nose smells.  Doctors solve medical problems, lawyers solve legal problems, mothers solve emotional problems.  You were created to solve a problem, and your success in life is dependent on your ability to find that problem and solve it.

You see, you will only be rewarded in this life for the problems that you solve for other people, so it’s imperative that you find the problem you solve best, and solve it.

2. Commit to be a Success

Success begins with a decision!  Success does not start when you buy your first Rolls Royce, or your first BMW.

Success is the progressive realization of a worthy goal!  Success is being all that “you” are capable of being.  Success is being your best, giving your best, and living your best.

Anyone can be a success, because anyone can decide to be successful, anyone can decide to give their best.

3. Have Faith in Your Possibilities

If you don’t believe you’re going to succeed, then …you’re probably right.  Faith in your possibilities is what gives you the strength to do the impossible.

If you don’t believe you will succeed, why should anyone else?  Why would anyone support you, if you’re convinced that your ship is sinking?  Work on your faith; learn to believe in the possibilities that lie ahead of you.

There’s nothing you can’t do!

4. Keep Your Life in Balance

What good is it to be wealthy and have no one to share your wealth with?  And it’s certainly not ideal to have people you love, who you can’t afford to give anything to.  Love finds its greatest expression in giving.

Work to keep your life in balance, you can have your cake and eat it to, but you have to plan for it.  Create a daily plan that allows you to be healthy, happy, wealthy, wise, and successful.  Never become so consumed with one area of your life that you let the others slip; labor to live a balanced life.

5. Help Others

To have “small” success, help a small number of people.  To have great success, you must help a great number of people.  Your success is dependent on your ability to help others.  Bill Gates has helped billions of people with his software and operating systems, so he has billions of dollars.  Michael Jordan has entertained millions of people, which is why he has millions of dollars.  To the degree that you help others will be to the degree that you succeed.

In Summary

It’s important to discover why you were created, this is critical; secondly you must commit to be a success.

Additionally, you must have faith in your possibilities, without this, you have no hope.

You must also keep your life in balance, and last, but certainly not least, you must help others.  …And you help others, not so that you can succeed, you help others because you were created to help others, and if you help enough people, the success that is your birthright will be yours.

Thank you for reading and be sure to pass this article along.

Mr. Self Development is a motivational author who teaches a practical guide to success and wealth. Please visit him at Mr. Self Development.com. If you’ve enjoyed reading this article, then you may want to subscribe to his feed, or read one of his most popular articles, “How I Manifested a Seven Bedroom Home at 24.”

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10 Secrets To Success

The Language of Success

There will come a point in your life when you feel that everything seems pointless. If you reach this stage, you need to try to look at your life and start considering what things you need to do to keep the fire in you burning. No matter how old you are, it is important to live a life that is full and happy.

If you no longer have the fire in your burning, there is a big chance that you will easily give up when trials and obstacles come your way. In order to make sure that your motivation to live and love stays strong, here are some tips.

1. Assess Your Life

The first step that you need to do is to take a look at your life. More often than not, people who are bored and unhappy do not really know the things that are beautiful and precious in their lives. They fail to stop what they are doing and to find time in assessing their achievements and losses. Once you have already determined what makes you feel down and bored, you can start to do something about it.

2. Set Goals

Many people who experience tragic or life threatening situations can stay strong and motivated to live because they have the reasons to survive. A cousin of mine who was trapped in a well for three days had the strong will to survive because his family is depending on him and he wants to be alive when his 12-year old daughter graduates from college. In order for you to stay motivated, you better know what you want to get out of life. Set goals so that you have something to look forward to in the future. Even if you are eighty years old, you can still set goals for your life.

3. Be More Positive

One sure way that can bring your motivation down is by thinking negatively. If you keep on thinking of the things that you cannot do and are not capable of achieving, you will surely start wallowing in self doubt and self pity. I once read an article about a woman born without arms who does not only drive a car, but also flies airplanes. If she can surpass hurdles in her life, there is no reason why you can’t do the same.

4. Count Your Blessings

Envy is something that can really put anyone down. Once you are green with envy, you tend to lose focus on your own goals and forget about the good things that are happening in your life. Instead of looking at the other side of the fence and feeling bad, you should try looking inside your life and count your blessings. There is really nothing wrong in admiring other people and wanting to have a comfortable life for as long as these desires will keep you motivated in achieving your goals and will contribute in making you live a comfortable and happy life.

5. Find a Hobby

Doing the same things over and over again can really make people bored. One way of making your life exciting and happy is by finding a hobby and learning new things. What you can do is to try enrolling in classes, like dance or photography, which will help you get excited and motivated. As for me, in order to keep me sane in a monotonous office environment, I collect comic books and toys.

6. Don’t Be Afraid to Change

Lastly, do not be afraid to change. Simply trying a new route to the office or eating at a new restaurant can help perk up your otherwise boring life. Having a new haircut or trying a new hair color may seem trivial for men, but they sure can give you a new image and make you feel afresh.

Author’s Bio:

Discover how you can achieve all that you want in life in The 77 Traits of Highly Successful People. Mark Foo has brought together 48 personal development bloggers and writers to co-author this success eBook that spells out all the success secrets. Claim your FREE copy of the eBook now at http://www.77SuccessTraits.com.

The most important person behind each of your decisions has to be yourself. Your health and attitude are what give you the ability to perceive everything else around you. Often times, we initially make our decisions based on how someone else will react, or how fitting the decisions are to society’s standards, but society would not be visually available if you couldn’t see it, or audible if you couldn’t hear it.

This is a reminder to put yourself first in a big way. Although it may be a big way compared to what you were doing before, it is probably not big enough compared to how relevant your presence is in the world.

Conversation Example

With all the hesitation that you may face when going up to someone in a public setting, conference, or party, most of that hesitation doesn’t take into account that, if it was not for your senses and perception, the person would not be there for you to make conversation with. You’re a puzzle piece in the interaction just as much as they are a puzzle piece in the interaction. When we assume that our presence is not meant as part of an event, we lose the majority of our socializing energy, and get stuck in a mental circular loop of doubt or questioning.

I might have written this article, but as you read it, all the marbles are on your side of the table. If you close your eyes, my text is not there(except in visual or verbal memory), and the only person that is left will be you and your thoughts. You have to keep this in mind when making decisions. After various interactions or questions with others, the point that you always return to is home base in your own mind. This constant reminder gets you to toss away any debilitating thoughts of how people will react, which I know have cut off my actions an immeasurable amount of times.

Two Thought Patterns

Here are the two patterns I routinely see us take, if I had to bifurcate(split) them into a common type and a successful type:

Common Type

1. Have a thought
2. Doubts come into the mind about how others will perceive it
3. Worry and fear comes from each option related to that thought
4. Disappointment comes from not even being able to carry out one idea
5. The result is nearly no action, and a bit of frustration

Successful Type

1. Have a thought or idea
2. Have a doubting thought about it, or how people will perceive it
3. Crush the doubt in the mind, based on the idea that you also have a say in how the world works
4. Keep crushing any doubts while implementing the idea
5. See the gains from taking action, and end up without that frustration from not putting yourself first

As you can see, the common way to act gets you almost no output, and also gets you frustration or disappointment, so it is a lose-lose scenario, regardless of the first intent to not let others down. Now, looking at the successful way to act, you can see that it might look rude during the process, in that it doesn’t seem to include much concern about others. However, the result is real action and productivity, lack of disappointment because the process was completed smoothly, and lastly, a result for others that is more beneficial to them than the intent the average type of person would have during the entire time. This case is a win-win scenario. Don’t let that “intent to be proper or not offend” be what constantly leaves you with no end product.

Discard Any Hindrance From Family And Friends

I also have to add in this section about how your family affects you. For those of you who constantly limit yourself due to your family, and don’t want to disappoint those closest to yourself, realize again that you are “numero uno” in that context as well. Family provides larger internal pressure than friends or colleagues, but you have to take this pressure and use it to create more for yourself. Doing something just to impress a family member will leave them wondering if you have your own foundation of goals and intent.

Put yourself first in a big way, because this whole world is only there because you can see it and hear it and feel it.

Armen Shirvanian writes words of wisdom about mindset, communication, relationships, and related topics at Timeless Information. You can follow him on Twitter at @Armen.

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A Smarter Approach To Time Management

The Only Time Management Tip Your Really Need

Before you open another door, follow this three-step process:  Stop. Pause. Enter. It might take an extra 10 seconds, but doing this will help you become more conscious of your objectives and help you connect with your spouse, children, boss, mother-in-law, or whomever.

If you’re like me, you have a thousand things you’re thinking about and commitments you’re juggling. You’re probably bouncing from one thing to another, trying to keep it all together. You might feel overwhelmed, overworked, and mentally exhausted. You also might spend a good deal of your mental energy focused on the future — wondering how you should reply to that email from your nosy colleague, thinking about your grocery list, or even daydreaming about your upcoming vacation.

You could say I’m a little future-focused as well. Okay, you could say a lot future focused. My three-year old daughter continuously asks, “What’s the plan Daddy?” because even at her young age she has learned that I always have a plan.

I took the Zimbardo Time Perspective Inventory — an online quiz to determine where you spend your mental time (past, present or future) — and my score for “future time perspective” was off the charts.

According to Philip Zimbardo (I revered him when I was earning my B.S. in psychology), future oriented folks make more money, are more hopeful, make the best of failure, and simply, get the job done. You might think I’m bragging, but there’s also a dark side. According to Zimbardo, future-focused folks sacrifice family, friends, and sex for success (his words!). Apparently we are so driven for a better future, we fail to recognize and appreciate the present. And that’s where the doorknob principle comes in.

If you find yourself focused on the past or the future and want to “live in the moment” a little more, the next time you come home, don’t just automatically open the door. First cleanse your head of all of the extraneous thoughts and baggage. Do this by consciously clearing your head. Forget about the traffic jam you were just in, the angry customer who couldn’t be pacified, how your son was a horror all day, or what you’re going to say at tomorrow’s meeting. Pause and focus on the doorknob. What color is it? It is wood or metal? Does it feel cold? By examining the doorknob you’ll help flush out the mental noise.

Now focus on who is on the other side of the door. It is your spouse? Your children? Whoever is on the other side of that door is probably one of the most important people in your life. Think about what they mean to you. With your heard cleared, open the door and enter. Make it a point to properly greet whoever is inside. For a great example of this, check out Jim Fannin’s video of the 90 Second Rule:

This simple three-step process is effective because it forces you to experience the now and become conscious of your intentions. It works just as well at the office as it does at home. Instead of rushing in to talk to your boss or a co-worker, first clear your head. I can’t think of a better way to spend 30 seconds a day of my other 8 hours.

In my next post I’ll share how I didn’t follow this advice and really blew a key meeting as a result.

For a limited time, you can download several free resources (assessment, poster, audio interview, video, and more) at www.other8hours.com and learn more about my new book, The Other 8 Hours: Maximize Your Free Time to Create New Wealth and Purpose.

“Into The Bloom” courtesy of PopArtMachine

I’m sure you’ve noticed that a lot gets said about productivity – not just here on Pick the Brain, but around the web. We’re always keen to squeeze a little bit more out of our day, fighting against all the interruptions and distractions of modern life.

It’s easy to end up struggling much harder than you need to, though, by trying to be productive in the wrong ways, at the wrong times. Working with your body clock and your natural peaks and troughs of energy lets you maximize your productivity all day long … rather than struggling through several miserable hours by sheer willpower, only to end up too tired and tetchy to carry on working.

Morning Lark or Night Owl?

A great place to start is figuring out whether or not you’re a morning person. Given the chance, would you prefer to get up early to finish off some work, or stay up late? I’ve been an early riser since my teens – I find I have plenty of mental clarity and self-discipline first thing in the morning, whereas my brain seems to turn to mush in the evenings!

There’s no inherent virtue in being an early morning or a late night person, and while you definitely can try to shift one way or the other, it’s easiest to just work with what you’ve got.

If you have any control over your hours, can you start earlier (if you’re a lark) or later (if you’re an owl)? Of course, that’s easiest if you work for yourself – but many employers are becoming more flexible about working hours now. If you feel that a shift genuinely would make you more productive, try asking!

Peaks and Troughs of Energy

Throughout the day, you probably find that there are regularly times when you focus well – or not! Again, I’m a morning person here: I get most of my creative, energy-draining work done before lunch. Others find that they need much of the morning to get going, and make big strides in the afternoons.

This might seem obvious, but it will really help if you can do harder work – like writing, designing, brainstorming and planning – during your “peak” times. Leave more routine tasks – most emails, phone calls, filing, photocopying, etc – for times when your energy is at a low.

In some cases, this might mean having a think about your normal working habits. If you regularly start the day by answering emails, would it be more effective for you to spend those first couple of “peak” hours working on something more high-level?

During times when you know you’re going to be struggling to focus, be particularly wary of letting distractions creep in. It’s all too easy to end up reading blogs, answering emails or playing around on Twitter or Facebook – and, often, distraction can become a vicious cycle. If it’s a real problem for you at particular times of day, look into software which will allow you to block websites during those hours.

Keeping Meetings and Appointments Outside Your Peak Times

I’ve got Charlie Gilkey of Productive Flourishing to thank for this tip, in How Much is Your Creative Time Worth?

Let’s imagine that you have the option of going to a doctor at 10am – right during your creative peak – or 4pm – when you’re off-peak. Let’s also say it’ll cost $60 to visit the doctor and your creative time is worth $128. If you choose to go at 4pm, then the net value of the visit is $100. If you go in the morning, it’ll be $188. If the receptionist at the doctor said that it’d cost you $88 extra to visit in the morning, I’m sure you’d choose to go in the afternoon. Left to our own devices, though, we’ll give up that $88 without thinking about it.

Perhaps because I’m a “morning person”, I used to invariably schedule appointments at around 9am or 10am – generally because I hoped the doctor/hairdresser/etc wouldn’t be overrunning already at that hour! However, taking a big chunk out of my morning means I lose my best productive time – whereas having the same appointment in the afternoon would only take time which I’d be spending on routine admin or chores.

Do you have a bad habit of scheduling appointments or meetings during times when you’d be better off at your desk? Can you adjust any of these?

Staying Productive Throughout the Day

Even when you’re working with your natural peaks and troughs, it’s still a good idea to do what you can to keep your energy levels up. For most of us, that means following some simple good health practices like:

• Drinking plenty of water – dehydration saps your concentration.
• Eating sensibly: neither too little nor too much. If you regularly find yourself sleepy after lunch, try eating a lighter meal and having a small snack mid-afternoon.
• Getting sufficient exercise. A brisk walk will wake you up if you feel drowsy during your working hours – and exercising during the day means sleeping better at night.

It’s also important to take breaks during the day. None of us can concentrate fully for long at a time (many estimates suggest that we can stay focused for about 45 minutes and then need to take a break). You might try taking, say, a ten minute break every hour, or working for a couple of hours then having half an hour’s rest.

When you do take a break, make it a proper rest – answering emails or doing the dishes isn’t really a “break”! For maximum rest in minimum time, try sitting in silence for a few minutes, perhaps with your eyes closed. It’s surprising how taking just five minutes like this can help you get perspective on your day – and can help you refocus and concentrate on the next task.

How do you stay productive each day? What practices have you found which help you make the most of your energy levels – or what stories can you share of when things haven’t gone so well?

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The Path To Success

I was a touring comedian for ten years and a very successful one at that; in fact, I hold the entertainment industry record of 106-straight weeks touring on the road. At the same time, I managed to retain my anonymity, which was important to me. In those ten years touring, I met tens of thousands of audience members after shows. The most common opening phrase they used? “I wish I could . . .” followed by their goal or dream that they just didn’t know how to go about achieving. In small towns, it was often just “I wish I could move to a big city where I could have some options.” (Small town people often feel trapped and because of it often become so.)

I found myself uttering the same phrase back in college at nineteen. Mine was, “I wish I knew how to figure out what I should do with my life.” Whether you wish for a new career or better life or more money or to lose weight or to become a rock star, it really all boils down to the same wish: You wish you knew how to make better choices.

It’s choices that determine how much money you make, your career, whether you realize your dreams, who you date, how much weight you lose or gain, and so forth. It’s what I really wished for at nineteen, as well. “I wish I could make better choices.”

Unfortunately, no matter what our education, no one ever teaches us how to make good choices. We never learn a decision-making process we can implement repeatedly, no matter the topic. That’s what I needed desperately in college and when I couldn’t find one, I originated it.

The key to making good choices is to answer what I call the Basic Life Concept Questions (BLC’s). Once you answer the BLC’s, you simply refer to your answers any time you have a decision to make. The BLC’s are your foundation for making good choices. What are the BLC’s?

What do you need?

What’s important to you?
What are your responsibilities?
What are your limitations?

Answer your BLC’s simply and revisit them from time to time, as your answers will change, especially following life-changing events, such as getting married, having a baby, or quitting your job. (What you want today may not be what you want tomorrow.) I find it most helpful to illustrate using my own life. At nineteen, my BLC’s were:

What do you need? A roof, food, clothes.

What’s important to you? Entertaining people, seeing Canada and the U.S., camping and seeing nature.

What are your responsibilities? Finishing college.

What are your limitations? Not talented enough to be a jazz trumpet player.

Another nineteen-year-old might have had completely different answers, like needing off-campus housing so he didn’t have to hear his neighbors combing their hair through the thin dorm walls. This is why it’s crucial to answer the BLC’s for yourself.

Armed with your BLC’s, you can make the right decision about anything thrown at you. I was good at math, so my parents, professors, and high school dean told me I should be an accountant or math teacher. Was either a good choice? I simply checked my BLC’s—nothing in them about math or teaching; hence, becoming an accountant or math teacher would have been a bad choice. I passed.

Since I was ten, I had wanted to be a jazz trumpet player. My BLC’s enabled me to see I wasn’t good enough to cut it. It was hard but I quit pursuing that dream. At eighteen, I had started performing standup comedy. I was quite good. Should I be a comedian? Again, I checked my BLC’s. As a comedian I could travel across the U.S. and Canada, camping and seeing nature on my off-days. I could entertain people while earning enough money for a roof, food, and clothes. Comedy completely satisfied my BLC’s! I pursued comedy as I completed college. (I didn’t quit college because my BLC’s told me it was my responsibility to graduate.)

As I noted earlier, I was a successful comedian for ten years. I have seen and camped the entire contiguous U.S. and most of Canada. So why aren’t I performing comedy any longer?

Remember, you have to revisit your BLC’s, as your answers may change. After ten years as a comedian, look at how the answers to my BLC’s changed:

What do you need? A roof, food. (I had plenty of clothes.)

What’s important to you? Helping others achieve their goals, having a strong social life, playing in sports leagues, seeing family and friends.

What are your responsibilities? Honoring comedy bookings.

What are your limitations? Touring as a comedian.

Whoa, what a difference! What was important to me at nineteen had become a hindrance to what was important to me at thirty-one, actually showing up on my BLC’s as a limitation. (As a comedian, I couldn’t play in sports leagues or have much of a social life—outside partying with audiences after shows—because of the travel schedule.) Seeing Canada and the U.S. was no longer on the radar screen.

I stopped booking new gigs and resigned from comedy after honoring my last gig. I then got a job in education, where I could help others achieve their goals. I currently play sports four nights a week, run two open gyms, have a very active social life, and frequently see my friends and family. I am an educational consultant and wrote a book that was a bestseller and got translated into Russian—God is a Woman: Dating Disasters—which shares my dating and sexual misadventures as a touring comedian, offering what I learned after each story as advice; hence, I am helping others achieve their goals. (The reason I am writing this article, too, of course!)

Many people are unhappy because they fail to realize what’s important to them isn’t part of their life; or, what was important to them years ago isn’t any longer but they are still giving it top priority. If you are struggling with choices or simply identifying your goals, the BLC’s are the ticket. They are universal; applicable to any topic or aspect of your life, no matter how big or small. You can use them to plan your wedding or redecorate your kitchen. (What do you need in your kitchen? What’s important to you in your kitchen? And so forth.) I made a BLC-list to plan a trip for me and my eleven-year-old nephew. The answers pointed to camping in Yellowstone. It was a huge success; he loved it! Additionally, the BLC’s give you balance, as they provide a complete, yet simple picture of your life. Make a list of your BLC’s and start using them!

Ian Coburn is a comedian-turned-author and speaker focused on helping others achieve their goals. He is honored to have the opportunity to contribute this article. He has one bestseller under his belt and shares his entire tangible decision-making system in his new book, Choice – The Meaning of Life: How to Have More and Better Choices in Business, Relationships, Government and Life, which shares his complete system for making good choices (known as the COR-system) and offers examples of its use in numerous topics. Visit www.bestpossiblechoice.com, where you can currently find a free copy of the book! (This early release is available for free for a limited time only.)

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You’ll cut back and forth between lanes on the freeway to save a minute or two from your commute. You’ll analyze and obsess over choosing the shortest and fastest checkout line at your grocery store.  And you probably even reply to emails while on conference calls. You do all of these things and more while telling yourself you need to use your other 8 hours as efficiently as possible. But there’s a HUGE difference between using your time productively and investing your time effectively.

Some activities are clear cut. Watching the same Seinfeld episode for the 15th time or playing online poker provides little growth or substance beyond adding entertainment and levity to the day, but what about all of those activities that trick us into thinking we’re using our time smartly when we’re really just wasting time?

One of the most egregious of these time and life suckers is information pornography. Information pornography is information in the form of books, magazines, newspapers, TV shows, and yes, even (and by some accounts, especially) websites and blogs that entice and promise us a good time, but in the end, just leave us feeling empty and used.

Information pornography has been around for years, but I’ve had to think a great deal about it since my post on Michael Jackson’s death. There were several readers who were offended by what I wrote. My point in that column was to question what’s meaningful and important and not to get sucked into what the media thinks is important. Breaking news isn’t the same thing as important, useful, or even relevant news.

Likewise, you (me, too) need to erect better barriers against information pornography. Be honest; you’re addicted to information. You must have the latest news, read the newest books, and peruse the most recent blog posts.

For a time, I was spending a great deal of time on productivity blogs (how’s that for an oxymoron?!). I love reading and learning about how to be more productive, but I found that I was spending a little too much time reading about productivity and not enough time doing anything else.

One of my favorite bloggers is Merlin Mann of 43folders. At one point it was a productivity blog, but after some soul searching, he too recognized the irony. Merlin has since shifted his focus away from productivity for productivity’s sake and now encourages 43folders’ readers to actually DO something.

So don’t make the same mistake I did. Create an information barrier. Don’t read this blog or anything else just because it’s in front of you. Really question why you’re reading, watching, or listening.

Here are three questions to ask yourself:

1. What’s the purpose? Unless you’re reading fiction for entertainment, there should be some goal for reading. What do you hope to learn? Ask that question up front — before you dig in — to set your expectations.

2. Am I satisfied? While reading, listening, or watching, continue to evaluate whether your needs are being met. If not, cut your losses and move on to something else.

3. What do I need to do now? This is one of the most important questions you can ask yourself. What action do you need to take now that you have this information? Remember, unless you’re reading/listening/watching for pleasure, there should be some tangible result. Is there an action you need to take? A change of behavior? Even if the information only produces a change in thought, by asking yourself this question you will hone in on the payoff from the information.

Information pornography is lurking everywhere — it’s not conveniently wrapped in a brown paper bag and, unfortunately, you often don’t know it when you see it. But once you get better at filtering the important from the immediate, you’ll have more time to invest in yourself and create something.

For a limited time, you can download several free resources (assessment, poster, audio interview, video, and more) at www.other8hours.com and learn more about my new book, The Other 8 Hours: Maximize Your Free Time to Create New Wealth and Purpose.

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You own the code. This code is not a secret and it doesn’t have to be broken or translated in order to understand its meaning. All you have to do is to make the choice to enter the code into any aspect of your life to begin receiving what you want.

Whether it’s improving relationships, losing weight, finding success at work, or making more money, the code is applicable to all areas of life and uses the exact same logic. The code isn’t hidden in a secret vault; it can be found in clear sight when we choose to look for it and then use it.

Getting Past Go

Perhaps the biggest obstacle to getting what you want is to just get going. Sometimes after you make the decision that “I will [fill in the blank with your goal]” you begin to hear “I can’t do it because…”

These self-limiting tapes perpetuate the lie that either (a) you are not worthy to have what you want, or (b) negative self-talk will begin to convince you that you are not able to do what you want to do. The lie begins to win and its power is seemingly too great to overcome.

We are not born listening to these lies. But over time our self-confidence weakens when a parent or authority figure labels us and tells us what we are and are not capable of doing. The answer to the code at this point seems much more difficult to figure out.

We begin to think we are able to do some things, but not other things. This belief in our inadequacies begins to define who we are; and what we will do with our lives.

To change this, you first must change your thinking. Get in touch with the source of these self-limiting tapes and begin to reassure yourself that it is possible for you to do what you want to do. Surround yourself with supportive, like-minded people. Find groups in your community who you can lean on for strength and encouragement.

Replace the lie with the truth to begin the process of moving past go and cracking the code.

Risk Versus Reward

One definition of insanity is when you keep doing the same things over and over, yet expect different results. Take your career, for example. You may feel under-valued, under-appreciated and under-compensated, but look the activities (or lack of activities) you are doing to change this situation.

Are you making it a point to remind your employer of all of your accomplishments? Are you looking to add new responsibilities? Are you looking for a new job?

No matter the situation, we often don’t realize the rewards we are seeking because we don’t take the appropriate risks. Modest risk is sometimes needed to begin seeing different results.

Fear is often times the barrier to taking risks. At work it may be the concern of upsetting your employer. In your marriage it may be the fear of creating tension and distance with your partner.

But if you are not getting your needs meet, what’s the worst thing that can happen? Your partner will resist and the status quo will continue until there is a more significant intervention. But look at the potential rewards if you take the risk and then ask for what you want

Be The 5%

The 80/20 rule suggests in any given organization or group, 80% of the people are mediocre and 20% are truly exceptional. In my profession, 20% of my company’s sales representatives are responsible for over half of all the company’s yearly revenues.

The 20% of any group is usually the nucleolus, the backbone. These are the people who can get things done. The next level of analysis is to look at the 20% of the 20; or the 5% of the entire group.

This sub-set of a sub-set is made up of the people with the most passion and drive to achieve. These are the people who will not give-up and will see any project or goal to a successful conclusion.

Want It More

The folks in the 5% want it more than the other 95%. These people may not be the smartest or the most experienced, but they are the most motivated to achieve. They understand the code to crack in order to have the life they want is to stay focused and to work very, very hard.

The five-percenters are willing to get up early in the morning, day after day, and go to bed late to keep their momentum and progress going. These are the people who “get it.” They understand their will and determination will deliver what they want. It will not be a matter of if, but only when.

To want it more means to do more. To work harder and to be prepared to do whatever it takes to get what you want. It’s one thing to say you want to retire at age 50, or you want to run a 10K race in less than an hour. But what are you really willing to do to make this happen? How badly do you really want it?

Saying you want something and putting forth the activities and the effort to achieve it are indeed two completely separate things. The code can distinguish between the two. You crack the code when you can, too.

Alex Blackwell writes for The BridgeMaker, an honestly-written blog about faith, inspiration and personal change. To receive twice-weekly articles subscribe here.

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