Bad Day? 5 Tips to Keep Your Motivation

Posted on March 25, 2010 by Robert Pagliarini | CATEGORIES: self improvement

A couple of weeks ago I had a bad day. Actually, it was a terrible day. Every piece of news I got was disappointing. Did it affect me? I still have bruises from the rock I tried to hide under.

Guess what? In the coming weeks you will have a bad day, too. Whether you are an entrepreneur launching a new product, an employee aiming for a promotion, or simply someone going after a big goal in your other 8 hours, you will experience disappointment and setback. How you respond to disappointment could determine your eventual success or failure. Why? A really bad day can, at best, cause you to lose momentum, and at worst, cause you to lose your will to continue.

Here are five tips to survive a bad day:

  1. Don’t add more pressure. Forget about turning lemons into lemonade. The first rule to follow when trying to turn around a bad day is to not try to turn around a bad day — that’s nearly impossible and puts way too much pressure on you. Your goal should be to survive the day and minimize the long-term damage by agreeing not to make any decisions. After a barrage of bad news, your decision making ability will be all messed up. Take a break and, if possible, escape…
  2. Escape. It’s easy to get too analytical and try to think your way out of a bad day, but often this can just cause you to dwell on the problem. Sometimes it makes sense to escape. Go see a movie. Go dancing. Play with your kids. Do whatever it takes to distract yourself and stop obsessing about your bad day. Your “problems” will still be there when you return, but you’ll come at them with a fresh mind.
  3. Insulate yourself. One of the best ways to shield yourself from negativity is by wrapping yourself in a “positivity condom.” Wake up 10 minutes early and write about those things for which you are grateful on a daily basis. About a week after I started doing this, I got some really bad news. The very first thing I thought was “this sucks!” I was shocked and angry. After about 20 seconds of this, I immediately thought back to what I had written earlier in the day. It instantly changed my perspective.
  4. Eliminate overgeneralization. What happens when you’ve been doing great on your diet but suddenly find yourself with an empty bag of Doritos in your lap and an unnaturally orange substance covering your hands? Usually generalization. This is where you turn a single negative event into a never-ending pattern of defeat, and it’s this kind of thinking that can cause you to give up after a bad day. The solution? Attack the belief. Write down all the reasons why this bad day is really just that — a bad day — and not a sentence to a life of failure.
  5. Avoid personalization. Personalization is another cognitive distortion. It is when you take credit for an event for which you didn’t have any control. Many of the negative events you will face will be beyond your control, but you might blame yourself. Got laid off? It might not have anything to do with you and everything to do with the company, but if you personalize this you’ll beat yourself up over it. Again, the solution here is to attack the belief. For each negative event, ask yourself, “Am I responsible for this or was this outside of my control?”

When you throw down the gauntlet and commit yourself to improving your life, you will face challenges. If you can follow these bad day tips, you’ll keep your motivation and you’ll spend a lot less time under rocks.

I’d love to hear what you do when you’re having a bad day. Post your bad day tips in the comments section.

For a limited time, you can download several free resources (assessment, poster, audio interview, video, and more) at www.other8hours.com and learn more about my new book, The Other 8 Hours: Maximize Your Free Time to Create New Wealth & Purpose.

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  • http://www.2knowmyself.com Farouk Radwan

    yes Robert personalization is very dangerous, when a person takes the blame for every bad thing that happens to him life becomes worse, thanks for sharing :)

  • http://www.pzizz.com SleepBarn

    that’s hard cause the whole day will be going bad.

    SleepBarn

  • http://www.craigharper.com.au/ Motivational Speaker – Craig Harper

    You make a great point on personalisation. While some things are within our control, most things are not. For this reason it’s important to de-emotionalise the process and understand that some of these events are not our ‘fault’.

  • http://enlightr.com Craig Thomas

    Nice post! I like how you’ve structured it in a survival like fashion. Avoiding personalisation is key for me. People can’t control anything outside themselves – so you can’t be blamed for it.

  • http://burstcreativity.com/ personal development guru

    I find that one of the biggest obstacles people face is the fact that people do not want to come out of their complacency. They are comfortable and don’t want to change – I think that comfort is one of the biggest obstacles to reaching ones true potential.

  • http://www.ameaningfulexistence.com Karen

    Hi,

    These are great tips on surviving bad days. We all know that life has its ups and downs, but when we’re in the down spiral it’s hard to forget what we did last time to get out of that spiral. I must admit that I favour #2 Escape for when I have bad days. Having a mental health day can be the best thing to do when the situation calls for it. Also, just talking to your most optimistic and upbeat friend can help you realize that life is not meant to be such a struggle all of the time. Tomorrow is another day :-)

    Karen

  • http://www.davidjparsons.com david

    great post, i really enjoyed it.

  • http://www.hypnosis-self-help.com Sherri Frost | Self Hypnosis

    I think it’s best to just wallow in it for a while and fully experience what’s happening. Then it’s easier to move on. I think we get into trouble when we tell ourselves that everything is ok when clearly it isn’t.

  • http://nlp-way.com Ben Tien

    I really agree about the second one… Many people think that escape will never give any result. Well, it’s not right at all… We have to know, we escape for what?? If we escape for ‘refreshing’, I think it is the best choice and with fresh thinking, we will able to face the problem again

  • http://www.OptimisticJourney.com Jarrod@ Optimistic Journey

    Great post! Disappointments are a big part of life. We should learn how to deal with it and not add salt to the wound and put more pressure on ourselves. These tips are very helpful, thank you!

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  • http://sandyxuan.com sandy

    i like the idea in tip 3, “write about those things for which you are grateful on a daily basis”.

    though i always hear this advice, i know the adorable benefits, still i hardly implement it in often basis. and i like to right start involving myself in the grateful mindset. i don’t want to let the bad day’s darkness over-shade the rest of shinny things all the time.

    and for me, when i am in my down days, depending on the various occasions i react variously.

    sometimes, the emotions are too overwhelming, then i just cry them out. it’s great healing for me. after that i can easily let go of my negative emotions and be bubble back.

    sometimes, i spend the rest of my bad day simply escaping, like mentioned in the tip 2. i am just too lazy to deal with the problem at the right moment. it’s no big problem for me to be little laid back in my loose days. music, movies, shows, sports, social activities…there are tons of things i can jump in to distract myself from my real problem. anyway, i know i will be back with freshy again right in tomorrow morning when the sun is new and my day is brand new too :)

    sometimes, the day is messed up but i still feel like battling out. then i will try my best to use my energy in wise ways. when i can truly calm myself down, i can figure out what’s indeed went wrong and persuade myself out of my little box successfully. and every time i make it, i will feel much stronger, which encourages me to cope with my next coming trial more confidently.

    everybody got his/her own ways to play with dark days and by walking through countless of them we will develop better moves :)

  • http://www.livingwords.net Doug Cartwright

    There’s a great book called Increase your Adversity Quotient which I think I will re-read after seeing this post. It does teach how not to personalise and how to overcome adversity. Great post, thanks.

  • http://poweressence.com self empowerment

    your point about the motivation is very well and you give the 5 Tips to Keep Your Motivation but not described the whole things about the motivation. i can improve your tips if you forward this to my email address

  • http://www.ruinedmyday.com Michael

    I understand how horrible some days can get – from little annoyances to the big world-ending problems. I’ve also noticed that venting out your problems is a sure-fire way to make you feel better – which is why I go here: Ruined My Day

  • http://www.flashgameport.com flashgameport

    Thank you very much for your contributions.

    Flash game

  • http://www.flashgameshark.com flashgameshark

    Keep yourself away from all kinds of grief.

  • Mazinkarom

    Working out is a great way to deal with a bad day!

  • guest

    This is a great article except for the last sentence ”
    Am I responsible for this or was this outside of my control?”  This is not helpful to people in my situation who are responsible for the bad day.

  • irene gil

    today i had  a bad day my friends and i are fighting or arguing with our “ex friend” and i have 3 periods with her in a row and i ride the morning bus with her i dont sit by her but near anyways she use to sit right next to me in 5th p but today seh change herself i am mad ,sad,frustraded because is like shes telling everybody the fight and making me and my friends look bad the truth is maybe we are wrong but i dont think so because is 4 against 1 we are not messing with her or talking to her is like indifference between us but .and that hurts because i share plenty of stuff with her .i know her since almost a year ago she came to my b-day party and i came to hers .im mad at her for making me not like her anymore .it all satrted on thursday we didnt have school on friday luckily on thursday we went to the park with the school and she spent the whole time whith her new friends we had another friend whos not even as close as her and when she weent to play with her new friends she came and ask if we needes anything but the other didnt she didnt even talk to us she completly ignore us she said it was because she was in a fight with another of our close friends .seh fights with 2 of them and she be so mean with the other one nobody likes her in our grioup anymore but i still miss her . she got her own friends so ist not like i should care i feel gilty HELP PLEASE

    • Guest

      Let go now and give her up but don’t be mad at her about it. That will never help being mad at her.  Just give up on her. Trust me. I’d say just find someone else. There are 6.3 billion people on this planet don’t be soo focused on one, play the field. Don’t get with anyone who doesn’t share the same values you do. Never bend for anyone!  Just move up and move on, never stay. Good luck. You probably won’t be able to do this