How to get Unstuck in Life: Fixed Versus a Growth Mindset
Problem: a fixed mindset causes undue stress
“It’s not how hard you can hit. It’s how hard you can get hit and keep on moving forward.” Rocky Balboa.
What is a key difference between those who dust themselves off and keep ‘moving forward’ after one of life’s ‘hits’ and those who drop like a stone?
It’s not possible in one article to cover all of the reasons people struggle to move forward. (although that didn’t stop Americans spending 13 million on personal development in 2010 trying to find out!). However, as dedicated psychologists and sociologists increasingly investigate subjects like happiness and optimism (Seligman), genius and talent (Dweck), procrastination (Steel) and influence (Cialdini) they are uncovering significant keys or leverage points which can make our lives more effective and fruitful. Read the Rest of This Article »
What to Change in 2012
It’s fair to say that most people reading this will want 2012 to be better than 2011. This isn’t necessarily negative nor am I talking recession, gloom and downturn. It’s simply in our nature to want to grow and develop – we’re designed to want to reach beyond our grasp and make things better.
It’s also fair to say most people don’t keep their New Year’s Resolutions to be better, do more to have more (and again this is in all areas: spiritual, material, relationships etc.)
Obviously, there are reasons for this (and drunkenly promising to love your dog more at 11.59pm is only one of them). The main reason is that on Jan 1st 12:01am you are actually no different to what you were a few minutes ago. (You may, of course, be drunker though.) As a result, by Jan 20th you have probably given up trying to change. Read the Rest of This Article »
The Awesome Power of Two Words
“Some men see things as they are and say why. I dream things that never were and say why not.” – Senator Robert F. Kennedy
The working of the human mind naturally lends itself to metaphor as in: the playground of the mind, the battlefield of the mind, the mind as a prison. What all these allusions depend upon is framing – the mind’s natural process of capturing an idea and using it to define and focus your attention on whatever is within its scope.
Framing is the process that truly confirms the Biblical statement: “As a man thinketh in his heart [Hebrew for mind] so is he.” If you think of your mind as a playground for ideas – it will be. If you think of it as a prison – it will be.
For some people their thinking does seem to imprison them through the spiraling of their negative thoughts; it brings ceaseless unrest.
What they need is a way to break out of that cycle to create mental freedom.
So what can help? Enter the two words: “What…if…” Read the Rest of This Article »
You are Unique: Live it Well
Other people want you to change your opinion to suit them but they won’t change to suit you. They just go on living their lives. How does that work? – Quote by My wife, 2010
John Donne said “the death of any man diminishes me” but I think a worse fate than being dead is dying inside – being diminished – while you live.
That is what happens when you poison your growth through letting others diminish, marginalize and demoralize you from reaching your potential. Let me tell you, living in fear of other peoples’ opinions sucks. I know. I’ve done it. Read the Rest of This Article »
How to Create and Live Out New Convictions
Traditionally, when we evaluate what direction to take our lives in we do a ‘values assessment’. This is a checklist of what you believe to be important to you. It might come out something like this (in a particular area):
Business/Career
- Serving customers
- Creating a great product that adds value
- Paying for my South American holidays
- Contributing to the world
- Helping people grow and develop their thinking skills
- Etc
Once you’ve ordered your list the standard advice is to seek a career that allows you to engage and live out your values. You can then feel that you are doing something that interests and compels you.
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